Maea
Stars, hide your fires
Don't go. The words burned on her tongue, curdled and sour, a plea that never actually made it past her lips. As the door creaked open and snicked shut behind Liam, she sank deeper into the nest of blankets and stoked the fire with her magic, for want of other fuel. It was the only light source she tolerated, the only luxury she allowed herself on this LongNight. It didn't seem to matter how many years passed without incidents or a hint of shadows to stalk the night, the dread was always the same, and her rituals had fallen back into old habits now that she had a home of her own to protect. Shutters blocked the windows on the outside, heavy curtains on the inside, and between every pane of glass and the cracks in the threshold sat moss to cancel out noises that may leak to the outside.
Of course, it wasn't completely safe. She couldn't refuse Liam the simple habit of going outside to fetch firewood, or take his usual run, no more than she could explain why the idea of looking out into that pitch blackness all but reduced her to a gibbering mess. 'Something might look back' was a child's reply, and indeed it was a child's fear that lingered in her chest, a trauma so deeply embedded into her marrow that it might never come away completely. Perhaps it was worse this year because of all the things she had gained; suddenly there were all these things she stood to lose, and she just... couldn't, wouldn't, ever find herself in the position where a lack of caution became the reason why it fell apart.
Perhaps she should have been more clear about the problem with going outside. Flipping a page in the book, she stared unseeing at the words, taking in none of their meaning. Maybe she should have gone with him. It was really such a simple task, collecting more firewood - and they'd compromised already by stacking it so close by instead of inside, like she'd wanted - but the cold was so painful now, and realistically there hadn't been any problems with monsters anywhere outside the Grounds, and yet... When she heard the tread of steps walking up the staircase, crossing the snow-clad porch, when she geard the handle turn in the door... for a second, her heart was in her throat again. Suffocating her, singing a dread keen in her ears, painting visions of all the possible and impossible nightmares that might spill over that threshold just because she failed to keep it closed.
Maea sat up as her name was called, made alert by the shift of his voice. A thought was all it took to cause every single candle to flare up, sudden and bright - it was pointless to huddle in darkness if troubl already found its way inside - and as she came to her feet it was with a tangle of blankets still snarled around the plain dress, her braid askew and eyes wide; ready for a fight or, when no immediate threat could be seen, a damn good explanation. Liam never just forgot things he was doing, not once in all the time she'd known him, so either this wasn't him or something had happened to shake him enough to shift his priorities.
"Why, what's wrong? What happened?"
Only Shii didn't seem at all bothered. Drifting across the room towards Liam, it pulsed with recognition before making a beeline for his pocket, drawn in by something Maea couldn't quite make out.
Of course, it wasn't completely safe. She couldn't refuse Liam the simple habit of going outside to fetch firewood, or take his usual run, no more than she could explain why the idea of looking out into that pitch blackness all but reduced her to a gibbering mess. 'Something might look back' was a child's reply, and indeed it was a child's fear that lingered in her chest, a trauma so deeply embedded into her marrow that it might never come away completely. Perhaps it was worse this year because of all the things she had gained; suddenly there were all these things she stood to lose, and she just... couldn't, wouldn't, ever find herself in the position where a lack of caution became the reason why it fell apart.
Perhaps she should have been more clear about the problem with going outside. Flipping a page in the book, she stared unseeing at the words, taking in none of their meaning. Maybe she should have gone with him. It was really such a simple task, collecting more firewood - and they'd compromised already by stacking it so close by instead of inside, like she'd wanted - but the cold was so painful now, and realistically there hadn't been any problems with monsters anywhere outside the Grounds, and yet... When she heard the tread of steps walking up the staircase, crossing the snow-clad porch, when she geard the handle turn in the door... for a second, her heart was in her throat again. Suffocating her, singing a dread keen in her ears, painting visions of all the possible and impossible nightmares that might spill over that threshold just because she failed to keep it closed.
Maea sat up as her name was called, made alert by the shift of his voice. A thought was all it took to cause every single candle to flare up, sudden and bright - it was pointless to huddle in darkness if troubl already found its way inside - and as she came to her feet it was with a tangle of blankets still snarled around the plain dress, her braid askew and eyes wide; ready for a fight or, when no immediate threat could be seen, a damn good explanation. Liam never just forgot things he was doing, not once in all the time she'd known him, so either this wasn't him or something had happened to shake him enough to shift his priorities.
"Why, what's wrong? What happened?"
Only Shii didn't seem at all bothered. Drifting across the room towards Liam, it pulsed with recognition before making a beeline for his pocket, drawn in by something Maea couldn't quite make out.
Let not light see my black and deep desires
