Table for Three
Jigano Silversmith
the Sage
Provost of the Loreseekers Soul Shepherd
Portal Guardian
Age: 36 | Height: 6'2" | Race: Attuned x Abandoned | Nationality: Outlander | Citizenship: Hollowed Grounds
Level: 12 - Strg: 30 - Dext: 45 - Endr: 38 - Luck: 42 - Int:
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#15
It was the fairest answer she could give under the circumstances. Whether Rory would see her or not was the question, but forcing herself on the farmer so that she could deliver her apology would be a deed done for her own sake, not for his. By being willing to wait for when he was ready to hear it, she proved herself more sincere than Jigano had expected, and he found himself nodding solemn acknowledgment inflected with genuine respect for her words. Then that is enough for me, he said simply, holding back the for now until he knew whether or not he meant it. Her actions going forward would define whether he would ever find himself able to relax around her, knowing the killer that dwelt in her skin, but after all that had happened and all that he had learned, he found he could no longer hate her so easily.

His question was met with acquiescence, and he puffed up his throat hackles thoughtfully as he considered his next words, knowing how important they might be. Isuma looked up from cleaning her talons to peer between raven and wolf, and she peeped quiet encouragement to them both.

Will you continue to be an assassin, here on Caido? the bard asked slowly. In the barrierlands and the Greatwood, there is no such thing that I have found, except what Outlanders have brought. Will you continue to make killing people your vocation? Or will you instead break a new trail for your future here?
Messenger

Age: 28 | Height: 5'0" | Race: Attuned x Abandoned | Nationality: Outlander | Citizenship: Hollowed Grounds
Level: 7 (lvl 3 Attuned) - Strg: 10 - Dext: 27 - Endr: 19 - Luck: 14 - Int:
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#16

Ashe
remember why you started.

   He took a moment to think, and her ear flicked toward the little peep of his griffin. She watched him curiously, cautiously, and when his question came... well.

   Her eyes widened a fraction, a shudder passing through her pelt. She didn't know what she expected Jigano to ask her, but that wasn't it. And what a weighted question it was. Her heart thudded loudly, and she had to drop her eyes from the blue eyes raven. Would she continue being an assassin? Or would she write herself a new fate?

   I had never... The wolf paused, looked back to meet a gaze of ice. I never truly believed there was a choice. That no matter what I do or want, now matter how hard I try, a killer is what I am. As if I have any right to claim to be anything better.

   Ashe let out a heavy breath, looking up toward the colorful trees, to the sky beyond, if only to free herself from Jigano's discerning eye for a moment. It wasn't as if she hadn't faced this quandary in the last three and a half years. She had tried so hard for so long to do good, to help people. But the monster always lurked with dripping teeth.

   If she wasn't an assassin, then who was she?

   ...No... she finally answered, dropping a raw gaze back down to Jigano. No. It felt like finality. Like an absolution. Like a terrifying step off of a cliff, and she couldn't see the bottom, and her heart thundered with the plunge. I don't think I will be an assassin anymore.
Jigano Silversmith
the Sage
Provost of the Loreseekers Soul Shepherd
Portal Guardian
Age: 36 | Height: 6'2" | Race: Attuned x Abandoned | Nationality: Outlander | Citizenship: Hollowed Grounds
Level: 12 - Strg: 30 - Dext: 45 - Endr: 38 - Luck: 42 - Int:
ISUMA - Mythical - Griffin (Venomous)
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#17
Perhaps oddly, her reaction didn't surprise him. From what Vai had said, Ashetta's childhood had been spent in brainwashing and indoctrination. It was not the conscious, adult choice that Rizz had made, but something forced upon her. That she had still continued to do it, and had proudly declared herself an assassin even after leaving her world was more than enough reason for him to be wary of her. But... after a lifetime trained to kill and never being offered other options, it was not so strange that she had never realized that she had them.

Perhaps not to claim you are better, he acknowledged bluntly. Not unless you try to become something better. It is something you will have to earn, for yourself and from others. But it is a possibility. Especially here, on a new world. One with new opportunities and chances to break old molds. Was that not what he had set himself to do? If he would allow himself that mercy, he had no right to deny it to anyone else.

Even an assassin.

An ex-assassin, it would seem, and he nodded his white head gravely, heavy beak dipping in acknowledgment of the decision she had reached. Only time would tell if her actions would suit her words, but he found himself willing to give her that time. Not quite the benefit of the doubt - he was still cautious of her and her past, the instincts that would not be so easily blunted - but she had earned the chance to prove the truth of her words, to herself even more than him.

It was, in many ways, like the conversation he had had with Kiada in the guildhall, and he found a certain wry amusement in that realization. Then find out who you are beyond that vocation. Vai's daughter. Remi's sister. Kalt's partner. Unicorn rider. Lightning caller. Hunting wolf. Food is always welcome in the Settlement, and Long Night is just around the corner. Stockpiling meat for the Rathskeller and Infirmary would help many. I'm sure the Monster Hunters will have more to do, too, when the snows bring other hunters closer to farms and homes, seeking easier prey among the livestock and humans. He stretched his wings, then looked down to Isuma, who looked up at him and gave a happy, tiny burp. Or seek a different path entirely. You have a choice now. And there is nothing so valuable - or so terrifying - as freedom.
Messenger

Age: 28 | Height: 5'0" | Race: Attuned x Abandoned | Nationality: Outlander | Citizenship: Hollowed Grounds
Level: 7 (lvl 3 Attuned) - Strg: 10 - Dext: 27 - Endr: 19 - Luck: 14 - Int:
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#18

Ashe
remember why you started.

   Ashe didn’t look away from Jigano this time, canine brows drawn together as she listened. This wasn’t the first time she had heard similar things: that she could pave a new path, that she didn’t have to be the monster she was shaped into. And she had tried. And she had failed, and failed, and failed again. How many lives had been lost with her ineptitude?

   But… but.

   How many had she saved, simply because she tried?

   The wolf huffed and gave a nod---freedom was terrifying, to be certain. She had been healing, or trying to, this last year. After I toppled my Guild, she started, unsure of why she would share it with him. Did he care? No, likely not. But there was a certain comfort in telling someone who did not have the bias view her family did that brought a new reality to it all. I was hunted, for years. I was never free, my Master shadowed my every move, murdered my friends, stalked me, deceived me… but I was trying. To defeat him, to protect… everyone.

   And she had fought and bled and wept for that stupid settlement. I found him. Killed him perhaps only weeks before we ended up in Caido. I didn’t… I had never planned for a life after that. I never thought I’d even live to see nineteen, let alone twenty. But after embracing Mort... things are different. The world became… different. She shifted her paws and wrapped her tail around, thinking of it. So much pain, pain so immense her mind couldn’t grasp it. But the love. If she had been in her human form, her eyes would have been filling. I was a messenger in Northaven. I was good at it. Maybe I’ll start there.
Jigano Silversmith
the Sage
Provost of the Loreseekers Soul Shepherd
Portal Guardian
Age: 36 | Height: 6'2" | Race: Attuned x Abandoned | Nationality: Outlander | Citizenship: Hollowed Grounds
Level: 12 - Strg: 30 - Dext: 45 - Endr: 38 - Luck: 42 - Int:
ISUMA - Mythical - Griffin (Venomous)
Played by: Cirago Offline
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Posts: 3,914 | Total: 7,219
MP: 10170
#19
If anyone had tried to tell him even a season ago that he would be sharing a meal with and listening to an (ex) assassin speak of her former life, he would have scoffed and checked them for fever. Much had changed in the world in even so brief a time, however, and though he did not trust this woman, his unreasoning hate at her had finally guttered out.

It left room for his curiosity to prickle and itch, that most dangerous of his vices. As she spoke the raven listened, cocking his head to the side curiously as he absorbed her words. A guild? For assassins? Terrifying thought, but though he fluffed his feathers in dismay he stayed silent, sensing something of the hesitancy with which she shared part of her past.

A confused and angry young assassin, it sounded like. Even a frightened one. But still, an assassin who had proudly identified as one even when her guild and master and entire world were shadows of a past distant in space... though not time, it sounded like. Jigano watched her with bright blue eyes, offering no absolution but withholding further judgment as well.

No plans for a life beyond the singular goal her existence had devolved to? Ah, but he could understand that, even if he didn't want to admit it. It was the mention of Mort, though, that caught him like a fish on a hook, reeling him in as his gaze brightened and he straightened up. Mort? Ronin had mentioned the god of death being involved, but Jigano had foolishly assumed he meant Ludo. You've met Mort himself? 'Immortal,' Ronin had called the friend who had sacrificed in exchange for his life, and the raven made a connection he should have put together months ago when Edy had mentioned Ashetta's disappearance in relation to the Fallen Star's return.

A messenger? Yes... that would be useful, he agreed, though it was a distracted agreement as he explored the ramifications of what he had just understood. But... How did you gain immortality? Was it something from Northwind?
Messenger

Age: 28 | Height: 5'0" | Race: Attuned x Abandoned | Nationality: Outlander | Citizenship: Hollowed Grounds
Level: 7 (lvl 3 Attuned) - Strg: 10 - Dext: 27 - Endr: 19 - Luck: 14 - Int:
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#20

Ashe
remember why you started.

   She was contemplating what she had just said---to become a messenger---but Jigano zeroed in on the life-changing piece of her recent story: Mort. The tip of her tail swished across the ground, unbidden, her eyes softening a fraction. Yes, she confirmed, her voice holding something akin to reverence. I met him.

   Then came the question of her immortality, and she held a deep breath. For the most part, the role she played in bringing Ronin back had remained blessedly under wraps. She had spent enough of her life with eyes on her back, and she didn't want it now. But of course, Jigano was a perceptive man, wasn't he? It was strange to know that her soul would have wandered this world for an eternity. To know now that it was gone, when she had never been aware of it before. She shook her head finally, tilting her head with thought.

   I didn't know that I was, not until Mort came to me. He was the one to tell me that I would live forever. Her voice had gotten low, thinking back on her meeting with Death - a piece of time that seemed to exist separately from the rest of her life.  He believes it was something that happened to me when falling between the worlds, that the Voice had a hand in it. It was... unnatural, and upset the balance. She gave a distinctively human shrug of her shoulders, dropping her eyes down to the half eaten deer, now free of the soul that no doubt bounded with Mort now.

   I haven't confronted the Voice about it yet. I'm not sure that I want to. She looked back up at the white raven, meeting his icy blue stare. She sounded almost like she was convincing herself as she went on, Mort has that piece of my soul now anyways. It doesn't matter anymore.
Jigano Silversmith
the Sage
Provost of the Loreseekers Soul Shepherd
Portal Guardian
Age: 36 | Height: 6'2" | Race: Attuned x Abandoned | Nationality: Outlander | Citizenship: Hollowed Grounds
Level: 12 - Strg: 30 - Dext: 45 - Endr: 38 - Luck: 42 - Int:
ISUMA - Mythical - Griffin (Venomous)
Played by: Cirago Offline
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Posts: 3,914 | Total: 7,219
MP: 10170
#21
Jigano listened raptly, his wariness not forgotten but distanced a little by the story that was unfolding. No matter his uneasiness with her former profession, the bard in him could not simply walk away from such a tale! Then came mention of the Voice, and Jigano's eyes narrowed a fraction. Had the goddess attempted to take Ashetta among her Ascended? Except the goddess had still been sleeping then, hadn't she? And yet, the assassin-turned-messenger was like Remi, both Attuned and Abandoned. Perhaps it was not so strange that the new goddess had taken an interest in her.

Somehow he wasn't surprised to hear that something the Voice had done had upset a balance. Whether that was for good or ill he wasn't sure, but he had his suspicions. You came with the first wave from Northwind, yes? First, confirmation, to make sure his assumptions weren't completely baseless. That was before the Voice had been properly woken, I thought. It's possible that she didn't do whatever she did consciously. You're like Remi, one who can wield magic yet still shift into animal forms. Abandoned and Attuned, a paradox... and a powerful one. It's possible that in her slumber she grasped after that power, trying to claim it for her own as one of her children, but found your soul already too close to the old gods to complete your Ascension before you passed through the portal. A hypothesis that was more based in story than fact, he knew, but it was a place to begin. Confronting her might not gain you anything but being brought back to her attention.

He tilted his head, surprised and - though he didn't want to admit it - more than a little impressed that she had given away her immortality and showed no regret at its loss. Even if she had only found out about it right before she gave it up, it was still a test of character he would not have expected from an assassin, no matter how righteous she painted her fight against her guild. Giving up immortality to save the life of another? He did not know how many people she had killed, or how many deaths she would spend her life atoning for, but that was undeniably a mark on the other side of the ledger.

A far greater mark than he could claim, and he squirmed a little on the inside as the confrontation with his bias grew deeper. Would you tell me of Mort, please? he asked, instead of dealing with the embarrassing twist of guilt that soured his full stomach. What was he like? He had Safrin's stories and memories of the god of death, but it was somehow even more 'real' to hear about it from a fellow mortal.
Messenger

Age: 28 | Height: 5'0" | Race: Attuned x Abandoned | Nationality: Outlander | Citizenship: Hollowed Grounds
Level: 7 (lvl 3 Attuned) - Strg: 10 - Dext: 27 - Endr: 19 - Luck: 14 - Int:
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#22

Ashe
remember why you started.

   Ashe nodded, though at first confused and almost saying No, I was in the second wave from Northwind. Of course, he was talking about here, to Caido. They had all been drawn from Northaven, after there had been multiple waves sent there from Northwind. Here though... she listened, one ear folding back in shame at her own ignorance. She'd had a direct hand in freeing the goddess, but she knew precious little about her.

   At the mention of ascending though, of claiming, her pelt bristled involuntary, her lip twitching with the want to snarl. Only the knowledge that the goddess was unsuccessful if that had infact been her intention kept her in check. She nodded again, throttling down the sudden desire to head straight for one of those shrines and confront the Voice. The last thing I need is her looking at me, I have enough to worry about, she agreed, forcing her fur to relax. I don't know much about her, but what I've heard is never good.

   The raven went on to ask her more specifically about Mort, and much of her tension bled away. What was he like? Ashe stretched her paws, flexing claws into the dirt as warmth spread through her. He's... he's hard to describe, she replied softly, eyes shining. When I saw him, it was like I had always known him somehow. I guess in a way, I have. His face is gentle, his eyes are vast and warm. And.. well, the story might do better. The wolf took a heavy breath. She had never believed in gods before coming to Caido, and even then, she had resented them. There were mixed feelings still, but awe in which she spoke of Mort was different than anything else she had ever felt before. She could hardly consider herself devout, but there was no denying that she held a certain alignment with the god of Death.

   As soon as the barrier came down, I left that tower. I needed it down, because Safrin had told me I wouldn't be able to reach Mort as long as it still stood. When I went to the shrine with Kalt, she appeared first, and... and then Mort. Ashe's tail thumped against the forest floor, going on in quiet reverence. He shielded us from the rest of the world, and he was so warm and bright. He's ageless. Young in appearance, curled hair, dark eyes that went on forever, and his smile... When I saw him, it was like I had always known him. In a way she had, hadn't she? The once-assassin had maintained an intimate relationship with death for most of her life... she had just catastrophically misunderstood Death for too long.

   As I told him that I was there to bring Ronin home, whatever the cost, whatever would have been asked of me... he explained that I was immortal. That I would never join him in any afterlife. I...I told him to take it. Take it, and in exchange, my best friend could come home where he belonged. And...he did. Even in her furs, her breath turned shakey as she remembered, as she retold. Had she told anyone the full story yet? No.. she supposed she hadn't. But Jigano knew anyways, she saw little reason for him not to have the whole truth, especially after the revelation he'd given her. I... embraced Death. We went somewhere, and everything was Mort. He held me, my essence I think, when he broke my soul open, split it apart. That's.. what it felt like. It hurt. A lot... but Mort was there. Everywhere. Holding me through it, soothing me, loving me. "Death and rebirth all in one," he had told me. And it was. She had been reborn in the arms of Death that day, broken down and put back together. It prickled on her skin suddenly, the conversation here with Jigano. She had been reborn. Wasn't this as good a chance as any to be something more than a monster? He knew me, Jigano. He knew me, saw me, all the terrible things I've done, the thing i had become... and he only had love. More than I can comprehend. It was... humbling.

   Ashe was more than glad for the wolf then, for that inhuman barrier between her retelling and the emotion that wanted to overwhelm her, for surely she would have been overcome with tears. It was hard for this damaged beast to think back on that endless love from such a being and not want to break down. Her pelt rippled with a shiver, feeling suddenly very exposed before the loreseeker that harbored such resentment for her. She swallowed roughly. I could come to the atheneum sometime, she offered with some hesitance. And I can tell you more of him. Of what happened.
Jigano Silversmith
the Sage
Provost of the Loreseekers Soul Shepherd
Portal Guardian
Age: 36 | Height: 6'2" | Race: Attuned x Abandoned | Nationality: Outlander | Citizenship: Hollowed Grounds
Level: 12 - Strg: 30 - Dext: 45 - Endr: 38 - Luck: 42 - Int:
ISUMA - Mythical - Griffin (Venomous)
Played by: Cirago Offline
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Posts: 3,914 | Total: 7,219
MP: 10170
#23
He took note of the bristling of Ashetta’s fur at the mention of the Voice’s possible machinations, and thought her discomfort wise. It’s only speculation, he cautioned. A possibility, nothing more than that without proof that is probably impossible to get now. But… I agree. Though I have friends among the Ascended, I do not trust their goddess. It was an admission that carried heavy weight with it, a sense of a tipping point being reached soon, and choices that would have to be made.

Mort, despite being the god of Death, was an easier topic for them both. Given how Safrin had described him, Jigano wasn’t surprised to see the assas—no, to see Ashetta relax as she fell back into memory. He tilted his head, not interrupting as she switched from recollection to proper tale, curious and respectful of both the subject matter and the story about to unfold. A professional teller of tales himself, he could hardly ruin someone else’s story, especially when he had asked for it! And besides, it proved a welcome distraction from his own guilt.

He had seen Mort in Safrin’s vision, but it was still intriguing to hear Ashetta describe him. Not simply his appearance, but his bearing and demeanor as well. She had given up the gift that most people saw as a blessing, but that the wise knew for a curse, without a second thought to save someone she loved. Although… he wondered, briefly, what she would do in the future if it was Kalt who died. She was young, he decided, impulsive and not used to thinking of consequences when she had never planned on living long enough to face them. And perhaps she would be lucky, and such a decision would never need to be made. What use saving for a rainy day if it never rained?

The bard had not expected the tale to continue, to lay out the process by which her immortality had been taken away, and he found himself fascinated, almost wincing in sympathy before he caught himself with the memory of Rory’s tears. She had endured much, this wolf, but she had done much, too, to hurt so many people. And in the end, she had been accepted by the gods of this world, in spite of all her sins and flaws, in spite of all her strength and pride.

He felt his feathers starting to fluff out, prickling as his skin crawled uncomfortably beneath them, and he forced himself to slick them back down, turning his head to preen his wings in a decidedly avian mannerism. That… would be welcome, he said cautiously, testing the words to see if they were true, and not finding an answer past the unexpected surge of envy that shadowed his heart. It was a petty emotion, one he was ashamed of, but he could not entirely deny it in that moment. I haven’t been to the Atheneum in a while, and I don’t know when I’ll be back but… I should return there, when this business of Queens and proclamations has passed. He walked more openly now, but until he knew whether there was still a warrant for his arrest he didn’t intend to make it easy for any Launceleyn to lay hands on him until he was good and ready on his own terms.
Messenger

Age: 28 | Height: 5'0" | Race: Attuned x Abandoned | Nationality: Outlander | Citizenship: Hollowed Grounds
Level: 7 (lvl 3 Attuned) - Strg: 10 - Dext: 27 - Endr: 19 - Luck: 14 - Int:
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#24

Ashe
remember why you started.

   The raven's feathers fluffed for a brief moment, and she half expected him to deny her. She couldn't blame him. Perhaps this unexpected meeting with him had gone better than she would have imagined. Maybe.. maybe she realized things she had been to afraid to look at before. But that didn't make them friends, did it? He was a smart man. An objective one. Even if she knew that she was no threat to him, how could he possibly be sure of that? An assassin raised, she knew better than most that anyone could betray anyone.

   Ashe still felt an unexpected relief at his acceptance of the offer. She didn't quite understand why. Perhaps this was a man she wanted to get to know, to understand, and something about that worked uncomfortably under her skin. She didn't want to want to know him. He had no desire for it, he knew what she was and was appropriately put off, so why in the five hells would she care?

   Then he mentioned the queens, and she was careful not to react too strongly. Still, even she could not hide the bristle of fur at the back of her neck, but she managed to quell the growl rising in her throat with a snort of air from her nose. They are no queens of mine, she half growled. She didn't know if she would ever release that knife, the one poised against those who thought to lord over her. She huffed a breath, looking down to the corpse beside them. But I understand. I'll keep an eye out for you.

   She met his eye then, considering him carefully. He would not appreciate it, would not want it, but she extended an offer she realized she hadn't given anyone since Northaven. If you ever need anything, Jigano, she said, her voice carrying the weight of what the words meant to her. ...I would help. Her ear flicked, and her eyes held a touch of an amused glimmer. If you ever find yourself in need of a messenger with a specific skill set.
Jigano Silversmith
the Sage
Provost of the Loreseekers Soul Shepherd
Portal Guardian
Age: 36 | Height: 6'2" | Race: Attuned x Abandoned | Nationality: Outlander | Citizenship: Hollowed Grounds
Level: 12 - Strg: 30 - Dext: 45 - Endr: 38 - Luck: 42 - Int:
ISUMA - Mythical - Griffin (Venomous)
Played by: Cirago Offline
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Posts: 3,914 | Total: 7,219
MP: 10170
#25
There was something to be said for 'the enemy of my enemy', and he found himself soothed and oddly satisfied at her bristling response to mention of the Launceleyn usurper. Nor mine, he agreed. Zariah talks a big game, but a lot of people aren't happy with her. She seems particularly unhappy with people who don't fall docilely in line with her commands, he admitted, deceptively innocently as he bent to preen the blood from his talons with a diligent beak. Something about not signing up for her little private army made her especially grumpy, I think. And if there was an air of satisfaction to his voice, well, who could blame him?

When he straightened he was surprised to find her eyes on him, intense blue meeting his own cooler, warier gaze. He waited to see what she would say, and when she made her offer he almost laughed at how similar it was to the unexpected support he had recently received from Remi as well. It would seem he was awash in well-wishes of late, from those he would never have expected to reach out to him. He controlled the impulse, though he cocked his head to the side, some of the chill melting from his eyes at the wolf's earnest tone. I will keep that in mind. ...Thank you, he accepted, managing to be gracious rather than grudging. That is kindly said. He did not return the offer, but the open hostility had faded from his carriage. He was wary, but he was at least willing to give her a chance now. And if she was serious about leaving her old life behind and beginning a new one?

Well, he'd cross that bridge when he came to it. Perhaps it wouldn't even catch fire behind him this time.
Messenger

Age: 28 | Height: 5'0" | Race: Attuned x Abandoned | Nationality: Outlander | Citizenship: Hollowed Grounds
Level: 7 (lvl 3 Attuned) - Strg: 10 - Dext: 27 - Endr: 19 - Luck: 14 - Int:
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#26

Ashe
remember why you started.

   Ashe lifted her head slightly as he elaborated on his thoughts on the self-proclaimed queens. Zariah in particular. Her ear flicked, and there was a thrum of grim appreciation at his defiance that would ripple down their attuned link. There was no mandatory enlistment now, but the thought of it had her blood boiling. I know the Launcelyns. I know Zariah, she all but spat. The Hawthorne's most loyal hounds. The sooner they're ousted, the better. She rose to all fours, her tongue drawing over the blood still on her maw, her eyes glinting with warning. She would recreate Northwind here, Jigano. And Northwind was country that festered with corruption, cruelty, and war.

   Her tail traitorously swished behind her at his acceptance, and she glanced out to the trees, ears burning. She had meant it, she had never before extended such an offer without meaning it. Once, she had been accused of stretching herself too thin, and helping the wrong people had hurt her before. Could she trust her instincts better now that her Master was dead, now that no one hunted her?

   Maybe. Maybe not. Her instincts told her that Jigano was a man that had no interest in manipulating her, but there would always be the hissing curl in the back of her mind. Idiot girl, it told her. Anyone can betray you.

   I should get back to the Guildhall, she said looking back at him, subtly letting him know where to find her should he need to. Don't want Remi or Ronin thinking I've vanished again. Feel free to carve up the rest of the deer, if you'd like. I'll hunt another. She gave a dip of her head to the loreseeker before turning toward the trees. There was.. a lot to think about. Still, her pawsteps slowed by the treeline, and she looked back toward Jigano. Thank you.

   For what, she wasn't entirely certain. She watched him and his griffin a moment longer, and then she turned away, the jet black wolf swallowed by the dappled shadows of the trees.

{end}


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