{SEASONAL EVENT} offshoots

LOREN

Not trusting himself to speak after the display of new magic—and Peter’s fearful response to the unknown energy—Loren just nodded. Thankfully the adopted Launceleyn cheered up immensely as the conversation went on. They both did. Or at least they did until the topic of Zariah came up. Sighing, the summoner ran a hand through his hair. It seemed that the lingering trauma from that time was still something he needed to deal with. At the other man’s admission that Loren was helping, he smiled gratefully. ”I’m glad to hear that.” It was progress, and that was all he could really ask for at this point.

Luckily, the summoner’s affected accent was enough to lighten the mood again. However, it faded away quickly again. Normally, he’d be touched that he was the first person Peter opened up to. However, Loren was far more concerned with how distressed the adopted Launceleyn still was when talking about his past. ”Hey, look at me.” The summoner would wait until the other man hopefully actually looked Loren in the eyes. If not, though, he’d say his piece. ”You are not broken. You hear me? You survived. And yes, you’ll have scars, both physical and emotional. They will take a while to heal, and some of them might never heal fully.”

He took a deep shuddering breath. ”It’s...it’s not easy, feeling like you’ve finally escaped. You might not feel like you’re ready to move on for a very, very long time. I didn’t feel that I could until recently. Still don’t. Sometimes I still feel like all this is a dream, one that will get ripped away at any moment. Because I lived with uncertainty, pain, and fear for so long I can’t trust the happiness I’ve found.” He fell silent for a moment, letting it all sink in. ”But you can’t let those fears, those memories, stop you from living your life. From seeing all the good you have.” If the adopted Launceleyn needed to hear it again, the summoner would explain again and again until Peter finally believed it.

look at how a single candle can both
defy and define the darkness

Look at me. The words were soft, but still a request (an order), and in his state Peter couldn't do anything other than listen, wide eyes moving up, finding Loren's and staying there. The words took a moment to reach him, to actually have meaning. Peter blinked, then leaned in, almost visibly clinging to the words. He knew, objectively, that Loren was right, but knowing something and believing it were different things. It was the believing he needed to work on.

When the other man paused, long enough to take a breath, Peter breathed with him, swallowing the lump in his throat and trying to keep it there, stifled inside. His gaze hadn't moved, still locked on the summoner, but they were watery now, just for himself. The certainty with which Loren spoke, the way every word was right made his chest pound. Finally having words for what he felt, and knowing someone else felt it too, it was... indescribable.

It wasn't enough to actually heal anything, but it was a start. Maybe. Hopefully. Peter looked away then, back down at the holes they'd been making, the seeds they'd planted, and he nodded. "I... Thank you. I'm um... yea." He rubbed at his face, as if scrubbing away any of the evidence of his distress, and looked back up Loren, his eyes red, along with the places he'd rubbed at too hard. "Are... are you...?" Peter didn't know what he was trying to ask, but hoped somehow Loren would.

PETER

I always thought I might be bad
Now I'm sure that it's true
'cause I think you're so good
And I'm nothing like you

LOREN

Hopefully Loren’s words would help Peter. However, only time would tell. Luckily, the summoner wasn’t planning on going anywhere any time soon, so he’d be around to help the adopted Launceleyn remember what they spoke about today. ”You’re welcome.” They both pretended to ignore the tears in the other man’s eyes, or at least Loren did. It seemed like the kind thing to do in the moment. While he would’ve offered comfort, he seriously doubted Peter would accept it from the summoner. Not yet, at least, not physically.

He also didn’t know what the adopted Launceleyn was trying to ask. However, Loren would do his best to answer anyway. ”I’m getting there.” He gave the other man a gentle smile. Indeed, after LongNight the summoner was feeling hopeful for the first time in a long while. It was hard not to feel that way: the sun was shining, the birds were singing, he had a burgeoning something with a handsome man, and Loren was planting something that would bring beauty to his home with his remaining kin.

look at how a single candle can both
defy and define the darkness

The words were simple, just a response to his thanks, but they meant more to Peter than Loren could know. To have someone like Loren, someone to call family, however tenuous, was a blessing he had relegated to his most wild fantasies, though he always chased it. Peter drew in a shaky breath and nodded, glad Loren had gotten the gist of what he meant to ask, even if there had been nothing actually said. The smile was appreciated, and even returned, equally as gentle, and far more shy. "Good. I... I'm glad." And he was. Really and truly, he was glad for the trust he was building with Loren, for the family that was finally starting to feel like just that, for everything and everyone else he has somehow gained.

"Should we um... should we finish?" Its mostly a rhetorical question, Pter already moving to catch up to the holes that had been made, and wait for Loren to take up the lead again. He was looking forward to seeing the fruits of his labours, to seeing the bloom of everything he planted. To sharing the sight and the progress with others.

PETER

I always thought I might be bad
Now I'm sure that it's true
'cause I think you're so good
And I'm nothing like you

LOREN

Loren gave Peter a genuine smile, one of those smiles that made the summoner look his age for once, young, and happy, and if not carefree, at least willing to take on the world's burdens happily. Not the brooding Launceleyn, but a man who’d been freed to live the life he wanted. ”I’m glad too.”

At the other man’s question, Loren nodded. ”Sure.” They continued walking down the path, completing their respective tasks; the summoner would make a hole in the ground with his water and the adopted Launceleyn would plant the seeds. The time passed in companionable silence. For Loren, at least, it was nice to be growing something once more.

And he wasn’t just talking about the seeds.

look at how a single candle can both
defy and define the darkness