Self-interest is divine
Amalia
Samuel Wordsworth
Book maker/seller / Naturals Advisor
Portal Calibrator
Age: 27 | Height: 5' 5" | Race: Ascended | Nationality: Natural
Level: 6 - Strg: 19 - Dext: 17 - Endr: 22 - Luck: 21
MIA - Regular - Ragdoll Cat
Played by: Lancydulac Offline
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#29
You know I still like you the most
The best of the best
"And what did she have to say about it? Being in Mort's realm?" Was she having a good time? felt a little reductive, but it was basically what he meant. Though he had no doubt the grandmother of the Shield of Safrin would be well cared for in the afterlife of the Old Gods.

They'd slipped back into interrogating each other, hackles raised and irritation obvious in their words. Sam sighed, shrugged his shoulders. "I don't know. The Voice won't tell me everything yet - she reveals things slowly...much like the Old Gods, I suppose. But I think it had something to do with it." He was sure Amalia would take this as an admission of defeat, but he believed eventually The Voice would provide a good explanation of the final resting place for his family.

"Mmm...I still don't want to go to Mort, though. I've never felt any love from the Old Gods and frankly...I don't want to be in their afterlife. Why is not alright for both to exist? For the Ascended to go where we wish, and for those that want to to go to Mort's realm? Why do The Voice's options always have to be destroyed in favour of the Old Gods?"
and the worst of the worst
You'll always be my favorite ghost
SAMuEL
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Amalia Chandrakant
the Shield of Safrin
Baker
Portal Guardian
Age: 22 | Height: 5'6 | Race: Attuned | Nationality: Natural
Level: 11 - Strg: 30 - Dext: 30 - Endr: 30 - Luck: 31
JYOTI - Mythical - Starwhale (Humpback)
Played by: charks Offline
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#30
until i'm ready, let me be
"That she was happy." She doesn't say more - her mouth clamping shut, her teeth coming together, the moment and memory too much to bear on top of everything, everything else.

"What about the dead Ascendeds? The ones who died in the Spire? Would the Voice let you speak to them?" At least her gods have proven something, while all he has to say about the Voice is further evidence she's obfuscated the truth. That the Voice won't tell him anything everything makes Amalia roll her eyes; she can't help it, already irritated again.

Why anyone wouldn't want to go to Mort's realm is beyond her. It also isn't the point. "Shouldn't you at least get to know? To make the decision - Mort or the Voice - don't you want to know what it will mean?" She runs her hand through her gold hair, the stubs of lilac horns appearing on her forehead.
i have to heal myself
AmaLiA
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Samuel Wordsworth
Book maker/seller / Naturals Advisor
Portal Calibrator
Age: 27 | Height: 5' 5" | Race: Ascended | Nationality: Natural
Level: 6 - Strg: 19 - Dext: 17 - Endr: 22 - Luck: 21
MIA - Regular - Ragdoll Cat
Played by: Lancydulac Offline
Change author:
Posts: 1,713
MP:
#31
You know I still like you the most
The best of the best
'Happy' did not mean much. Sam was sure most people that had followed the Old Gods would claim to be happy when finally in their deitie's realm. Besides, as much as he was trying to be kind and understanding to Amalia's view, he could not be entirely sure she was telling the full truth.

Of course, she could not be sure of that from him either. "No, but I have never asked to. Perhaps I will, next time I see her. I will tell you what she says." Hopefully Amalia would see it was reasonable for him to have never seen a dead Ascended soul when he had never expressed a wish to.

"Shouldn't you have the decision?" He automatically turned the question back to her, but then paused and sighed, tried to formulate a less antagonist answer. "I am sure by the time I do die, I will know where I am going and I will be happy in it. So far, the Voice had always cared for me, looked after me, healed me when I needed it - why would she abandon me upon death?"
and the worst of the worst
You'll always be my favorite ghost
SAMuEL
Base Code by Sky!
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Amalia Chandrakant
the Shield of Safrin
Baker
Portal Guardian
Age: 22 | Height: 5'6 | Race: Attuned | Nationality: Natural
Level: 11 - Strg: 30 - Dext: 30 - Endr: 30 - Luck: 31
JYOTI - Mythical - Starwhale (Humpback)
Played by: charks Offline
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Posts: 1,698
MP:
#32
until i'm ready, let me be
She's growing more frustrated by the minute - with him, with herself, with this whole situation. They can argue each other in circles until the sun comes up, and then what? Neither will have changed their minds.

Biting firmly on her lips, Amalia turns her head from Sam. The weariness is returned to her face; shaking her head as he speaks, she reaches out for the letter again. It feels so heavy in her hands, so dry against her fingers- so meaningful, but meaningless, too.

"Sam..." Trailing off Amalia sighs, staring down at the paper on her lap. "Do you think... Do you think we'll ever have a relationship? Do you think we'll ever be able to, to actually talk? And be a... A fam... Or whatever? Or will the gods always be in the way?"
i have to heal myself
AmaLiA
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Samuel Wordsworth
Book maker/seller / Naturals Advisor
Portal Calibrator
Age: 27 | Height: 5' 5" | Race: Ascended | Nationality: Natural
Level: 6 - Strg: 19 - Dext: 17 - Endr: 22 - Luck: 21
MIA - Regular - Ragdoll Cat
Played by: Lancydulac Offline
Change author:
Posts: 1,713
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#33
You know I still like you the most
The best of the best
Clearly, this was not going well anymore. They'd both retreated back to their own camps, were just throwing rocks at each other out the window now, truce dropped. The irritation on Amalia's face matched Sam's own and he looked away too, to stare down at the floor. Few people managed to annoy Sam rather than upset or scare him, but Amalia had done it in the way only family could; bickering like siblings already, he supposed.

Her question made him sigh, made him wish he wasn't having this conversation because of how difficult it was. "Do you want that...? I mean...I talk to Jigano still, and we disagree on this. I think we'd have to see if we have anything in common, you know, in our everyday lives. When we aren't talking about the Gods."
and the worst of the worst
You'll always be my favorite ghost
SAMuEL
Base Code by Sky!
Reply
Amalia Chandrakant
the Shield of Safrin
Baker
Portal Guardian
Age: 22 | Height: 5'6 | Race: Attuned | Nationality: Natural
Level: 11 - Strg: 30 - Dext: 30 - Endr: 30 - Luck: 31
JYOTI - Mythical - Starwhale (Humpback)
Played by: charks Offline
Change author:
Posts: 1,698
MP:
#34
until i'm ready, let me be
Does she want that? To be a family- to have a family again, one forged in blood and shared experience? Of course she wants it. Why else would she be trying now to find common ground, impossible as it may seem?

But does he want her? That she doesn't know. Dysfunctional as the lot may be, the Wordsworths already are a family, and Amalia isn't part of that. She's an accident, an interloper, possibly one of many. Something curls and boils in her chest, pushing up into her throat; it will be easy for Sam to read the anxiety in the way she begins to fidget and fret, fingers pulling at each other, her lip sucked in between her teeth.

She doesn't look at Sam when she speaks, her voice hoarser than she'd like it to be. "Do... Do you want it? To... To try?"
i have to heal myself
AmaLiA
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Samuel Wordsworth
Book maker/seller / Naturals Advisor
Portal Calibrator
Age: 27 | Height: 5' 5" | Race: Ascended | Nationality: Natural
Level: 6 - Strg: 19 - Dext: 17 - Endr: 22 - Luck: 21
MIA - Regular - Ragdoll Cat
Played by: Lancydulac Offline
Change author:
Posts: 1,713
MP:
#35
You know I still like you the most
The best of the best
Clearly they'd struck onto something difficult for Amalia to talk about, from the way her features shifted from the irritation at Theological differences into something that looked more simply upset, sad. Sam felt some of the frustration in his chest melt away watching her, recognised that look from his own sleepless nights.

"...Yes. After all, I've never had a good family. I'm only just starting to make good with Evie. We...none of us have had an easy time. We might need eachother for further things to come." Weakly, he smiled at her. "Even if thats killing each other through bickering."
and the worst of the worst
You'll always be my favorite ghost
SAMuEL
Base Code by Sky!
Reply


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