From being an Abandoned who had rarely left the Hollowed Grounds, to embracing the call of adventure, to dying and being reborn first as an Ascended and then as an Ancient, Maea has gone through quite the amount of changes in her life. One thing remains common, though, in her attempts to find out just where she belongs; she’s always had a craving for knowledge which has brought her to so many places and to meet so many people here in Caido. We can’t wait to see what else is in store for her!
Congratulations, Maea!
Credits
Court of the Fallen was created in October of 2018 by Odd, Honey, and Crooked.
Skinning and hosting by the epically talented Kaons, and functionality fanciness by the coding magic of Neowulf. If you ever see either of them around, make sure to show them some love!
It was only confirmed by how Loren responded that he only offered to listen due to customs. He had no real interest in hearing all of his troubles or experiences going on recently, so why waste Loren's time or energy expelling all of his tales? Maybe if he had something positive to say he would indulge Loren, but seeing as he had nothing, he chose to remain quiet.
Loren remained quiet, which Oliver of course over-analyzed. Most likely, the man was internally mocking him. Seeing his plight as an admission of his stupidity and inability to properly function in life. Of course he had to get fucked over by Frey, the boy who craved the attention of the gods so dearly. Loren's response, though, confused him ever so slightly. "Fulfilling and exciting lives? How so? And how exactly am I supposed to live one of these lives if I can't exactly....do what Frey centers around." The last part came out more as a question since he wasn't entirely sure how to word it. Didn't Frey's motivations revolve around sex? So why take that away from him?
What Loren said next wasn't too surprising and honestly, he agreed with him. "Trust me, I know." He was tired and exhausted, somewhat annoyed that Loren would assume that he thought his issues were bigger than others. "It's honestly more embarrassing than anything else. As you saw, it's kinda hard to hide. It's an inconvenience and there are certain people that I really hope don't see me like this." So while Harper knew he couldn't have sex anymore, he didn't need to see that. It was far too much for Oliver to force on him and it was terribly embarrassing as well.
"Frey just kinda...did it. One moment it was in front of me and then the next? My di- body was altered and...yeah." It was a bit more of an explanation of what happened than actually answering Loren's question. "I don't know... I don't know how to fix it and I don't see why it wouldn't be permanent... I guess I just don't wanna get my hopes up."
I JUST WANT MY EXISTENCE TO BE MORE THAN TREMBLING
Glancing up from his work, Loren frowned slightly at Oliver. "Well, first of all, Frey isn't just about sex." Looking down again, the healer resumed sewing his fellow hybrid's pants. "They just don't want people moping or whining to them. However, even if sex was all they cared about, nothing's stopping you from helping other people orgasm." Despite the subject and the words, the Launceleyn's voice was mostly just matter of fact, and there was no hint of cruelty in it.
Indeed, his tone was entirely informative. "It doesn't have to be about your pleasure, after all. In fact, it shouldn't be just about what you want." He shrugged.
"Then don't get your hopes up. But lots of people live happy lives without sex." Loren's voice grew a little sad towards the end of that statement. "Plus, you can still, you know, enjoy yourself even without a dick." Only now did he flushed a little, embarrassment coloring his cheeks.
That didn't stop him from shooting Oliver a sly glance. "What people?"
There was....a lot to process. Almost all of what Loren said sounded incorrect, like he had made massive assumptions about him. Shaking his head, Oliver bit down on his lip briefly, trying to actually consider what he was going to say next. He had to choose his words carefully since already he had been misunderstood. "If you could...I want to learn more about Frey. Tell me what you know so that I may improve myself for the future....what I have done probably wont be forgiven because I know that I was immature and stupid, but I at least want to better myself." He truly did want to learn from his mistake because he knew that he was the only one to blame. Frey was only giving him what he deserved.
And speaking of what he deserved, Loren had misunderstood him. "Listen, I know that life isn't all about sex. Trust me. I'm completely fine with not doing it ever again or only carrying about the other person. What my worry is that someone will be incapable of loving me because of my mistake." His voice trailed off as he turned to look off to the side momentarily before his eyes returned to land on Loren. "I worry that someone will think I'm stupid and that they will be incapable of loving me because I'm broken. I'm happy with my current self, trust me. It's just so embarrassing because...I don't know. You already assumed that I miss sex, but guess what, I don't! His voice wasn't angry nor agressive, he simply sounded tired and like he had given up. Oliver wanted to live a normal life, he didn't care anymore that he couldn't have sex. "I want to make someone else happy...but what if they refuse to love a man who was so stupid that he got a wooden dick." The words slipped out without him realizing it, revealing to a person for the first time the full extent of his curse.
Letting out a soft sigh, he ran a hand through his hair. "I mean...I'm not sure if they really count....but there's a guy I kinda like and I told him and....gods he was so nice about it...but...it's complex." Complex because we still don't know what happens in the thread due to timeline issues. Complex because he still lives in fear that if Harper and him never work out in the end, that he wont find someone as nice and supportive as his friend. "But...he doesn't know what it is. He only knows I cant have sex...so I'm kinda just...scared of showing him...but that's assuming he even wants to see me like that." He wasn't self deprecating, really, he sounded more confused than anything else. This was a new area for him and he felt lost.
Trying to cheer himself up and not be a sad little bitch, Oliver tried to put on a fake face. "But hey, you didn't notice anything until I was almost butt ass naked. So maybe I can hide it for the rest of my life."
Letting out a bitter laugh, Loren shook his head. "The one thing I really know about Frey is that I'm the last person you should be asking for advice about them." Shrugging, he gave Oliver a wry look.
However, as his fellow hybrid continued to speak, the healer sighed. He simply sewed in silence as the other man expressed his concerns. The Launceleyn only looked up when the other man finished. For a long while, Loren chewed on his lip.
Finally he sighed. "Look, I'm not really the person to ask about relationship advice either." Leaning back a bit, he spread his hands a bit helplessly. "But it seems to me that anyone who won't love you for who you are, both the good and the bad, warts and all, isn't worth your time, attention, or affection." Voice quiet, he gave Oliver an apologetic smile.
02-21-2020, 02:42 AM (This post was last modified: 02-21-2020, 02:43 AM by Oliver.)
OLIVER
Oh that only sparked Oliver's curiosity even more. Loren really should know him better as any tale is a good tale in Oliver's mind...okay, any tale where someone doesn't die is a good tale. "Would you mind telling me more? About why that's the case?" He was clearly very intrigued and wanted to know more. Already, he knew why Jigano had a massive hatred for Safrin, so might as well find out why Loren and Frey's relationship sucked. '
Loren had allowed him to ramble and rant, which honestly was something he absolutely needed. At this point, he had run out of steam and was now simply simmering in his own distress and internal monologues about how much of a failure his was. That was, until, he heard the kind words that Loren had to say. Even if Harper had already said the same thing, it made him smile and blush ever so slightly. Loren really did care about him...aw...so much for not being a good friend.
"Thank you Loren... I'll try to make sure I find someone who will treat me like that." He offers the man a grin before adjusting the coat, clearly not happy with the fact that his legs were bare. It was freezing as fuck and he really needed to put something on his legs. "I think this curse is actually a good think, ya know? It allows me to relax and not give a fuck about that kind of shit." He offers Loren a shrug, trying to think of the positives currently.
Clearing his throat, he glanced at Loren's work. "One second." He then proceeded to shift into his leopard shift, curling up into a ball and relishing in the warmth the fur gave him. He left out a soft purring noise as continued to watch Loren, his tail swishing with delight. Thanks for fixing my clothes for me, it means a lot. Are you okay? I kind of stabbed you, didn't I?
I JUST WANT MY EXISTENCE TO BE MORE THAN TREMBLING
Loren raised his eyebrows at Oliver. "Because last time I spoke to them I completely failed the task they laid before me, and they called me terribly dull?" Unsurprisingly, the healer's voice was a little curt, though he sent a pulse of apology through his bond with his fellow hybrid.
Nodding at the other man's words, the Launceleyn set down his sewing needle. Moving the mended clothes towards Oliver, Loren rose from where he'd been crouched. "Those are done." Returning to his cleaning, he moved the table back where it belonged. "You're welcome. And I hope you find someone. I'm glad you're seeing the upsides in all this in the meantime, though." It came out quietly, and he waved a hand over the pitcher, refilling it with his magic since it had spilled out during their training session.
Glancing at the other man, the healer rubbed a hand against his thigh. Of course, that, and Oliver's reminder about the stab wound, just drew Loren's attention to it. "Right. I didn't even notice." Frowning a bit, sparks of sky blue knitted his flesh closed.
That comment caused a very obvious frown to appear on Oliver's face. He wanted to know what the task was, obviously, but there was something far more important about what Loren said. "Hold up....Frey called you dull? Loren? Dull?" He was clearly surprised. Frey clearly didn't know anything. "I mean, I don't think you're dull. Not in the slightest. Yeah, you don't always show your emotions, but that doesn't mean you're dull nor is anything wrong with that!" Okay, maybe that was a tad bit too blunt, but he genuinely meant it. "You have such a vivid passion for what you believe in. And you have such dedication, that's far from dull in my eyes." Yet another rant, but damn would Oliver defend his friend. Frey was such a fickle god, so it seemed.
Then an idea came to his mind, a very saddening one. "Did....did Frey hurt you at all? Are you okay?" If Frey and Loren didn't get along....had something bad happened? He had to make sure his friend was okay, that Loren wasn't hurt or hiding something himself. His own safety mattered far more than a wooden dick.
Watching as Loren cleaned, the now leopard followed him along, somewhat wishing he could somewhat helped, but everything else had already been cleaned up and finished. Once the wound was healed, a strange thought occured to him. Wait...why aren't you bundled up? Aren't you cold? I know I am. It's clearly why he shifted into his leopard form, to feel warmth and comfort. A fire would be damn nice right now, as would a hot drink and hot food and- gods now he's hungry. It's probably obvious seeing as he was now screaming through the bond that he was very hungry....and his stomach also happened to growl at just the right time. Splendid.
I JUST WANT MY EXISTENCE TO BE MORE THAN TREMBLING
Loren sighed, and pinched the bridge of his nose. "I think it had something to do with the fact that I was in mourning for the man I loved." Voice soft and sorrowful, he turned away from Oliver, not really wanting to continue talking about it.
However, the healer glanced over his shoulder at his fellow hybrid's question. "No, I'm fine. They just told me not to call upon them again until I was exciting again." Facing away from the other man again, the Launceleyn poured himself a glass of water and chugged it, then rolled the empty cup between his palms.
Shrugging, Loren shook his head at Oliver's observation. "Not really. I think membership in the Arcane Academy bestowed some sort of magic resistance to the cold." At least, that's what it had seemed like during the initiation. As hunger filled the bond, the healer stared at the wall. "You must be famished after our spar. Come along then." It came out idly, as if it wasn't readily apparent. Turning, the Launceleyn began to lead the other man out of the sitting room and to the kitchens.
A silence settled between the two as Oliver contemplated everything Loren had said. It was tragic and honestly awful that Frey would be so rude to a man who was mourning the lost of his lover. It was horrible and honestly, Oliver was happy that he hadn't been present to see the death of Abasi. While the two had disagreed and Oliver believed the man to be unfit to have a place of ruling, he didn't want him to die. Loren deserved to feel happy, not to face loss after loss. No words would help the situation, so all Oliver could do was offer his comfort and be there for his friend.
The topic would thankfully shift and it became plainly obvious that Oliver was hungry. Sheepishly, he shifted back into a human and hurriedly rushed to get dressed, realizing that he was both cold and a little too indecent to be venturing around the palace, didn't need anyone other than Loren to see him like this. Fumbling around, Oliver managed to get his pants back on and almost ripped off his coat to put back on some of his tops before the coat was picked back up and draped over his shoulders once more. It was honestly a very comical sight of a man who was very uncordinated trying to get dressed as fast as he could in the name of receiving food.
Offering Loren a grin, he followed after him, clearly eager to see what cuisine the palace had to offer. "Thank you, for you know, offering food and stuff."
I JUST WANT MY EXISTENCE TO BE MORE THAN TREMBLING
Thankfully, Oliver didn't follow up about Abasi, for which Loren was grateful. Discussing his dead love, or his recent encounter with Frey were both just likely to result in the healer lashing out. Waiting patiently as his fellow hybrid shifted and got dressed, the Launcleyen nodded. Then he began walking through the halls to the kitchen.
Glancing over at the other man, Loren shrugged. "Of course." Smiling faintly, he waved a hand vaguely in the air. "You're a guest, and entitled to our hospitality. It would reflect poorly on us if we didn't feed you." The words were awkwardly formal and stilted, but the faint sense of acceptance he sent through their bond should hopefully make up for it.
The two had made a silent agreement of sorts to allow the situation with Frey and Abasi to rest, that there was no need to speak more on the subject. Oliver wasn't there for either of the situations so he had no reason nor any right for that matter to speak on the subject. It was a mood changer, for sure, but it didn't completely ruin the day for either of them it seemed, for Loren was actually...smiling?
It was small, but Oliver caught it and in turn, he smiled back at his friend, far bigger and more obvious. While Loren was attempting to act like this was some form of diplomacy, Oliver just saw it as his friend being kind. Oliver didn't have anything to really offer to the palace and Loren probably didn't have anything to gain from feeding him. It was a nice offer and he would gladly take it. Following along Loren, Oliver looked around as they made their journey to the kitchen.
"Have you enjoyed the palace so far? I mean...do you cook at all anymore? Do you have a favorite dish you've discovered since coming here?" Oliver clearly was trying to talk more about life in the palace rather than emotional recovery at this point. Of course Loren was still mourning the loss of Abasi so he wouldn't be overjoyed, but maybe he had something to talk about when it came to his new palace life. "How many people live here?"
I JUST WANT MY EXISTENCE TO BE MORE THAN TREMBLING
Rubbing a hand on the back of his head, Loren glanced at Oliver. "It's fine?" Shrugging, the healer looked ahead again as they turned the corner. "Obviously the accommodations are nice." The words came out slightly stiltedly and unsure.
Shaking his head at the next question, he dodged around a servant. "I don't cook anymore, no." His tone was fairly neutral about that. "No I don't have a favorite dish. It's mostly just meat of various kinds."
Brow furrowing, he tilted his head to one side. "Not that many. Halo has a very small population." Drumming his fingers on his thigh, he looked at his fellow hybrid again. "How is everything back in the Hollowed Ground?" There was mostly just polite interest in the Launceleyn's voice.
Yeah...so maybe what he asked was a tad bit awkward, but honestly, when was he not awkward around Loren. This was at least a massive improvement from when the two first met and Oliver was a scrambling little twink who couldn't even lift a stick without fucking up. Now he could lift big sticks. "Sorry...I've just never been in a palace like this...your manor was like, the biggest home I can remember being in." Oliver enjoyed exploring and seeing what the world had to offer, more specifically, he liked being indoors within the safety of a home. New homes were always cool to explore and this one was no different. And that's when an idea came to mind, but he'd wait a small bit.
Loren's responses were vague, but he couldn't really blame him. "Do you...miss cooking? Or baking?" Who knows, maybe Loren did. It was a tad bit sad that Loren didn't have a favorite dish. Maybe someday he'd be able to find one. Everyone deserved a dish they could eat as a pick me up or something to show to someone on a first date. A dish to perfect the recipe of and to take pride in. Hopefully Loren would be able to find that for himself.
When Loren actually asked him something, Oliver's eyes clearly widened. Even if he was just being polite, Oliver didn't really expect the topic to come up. "Since you've left, I've taken over the manor. I keep things clean and, you know, have the place open for people if they need a home. Nobody new has come in, not yet, but I promise to keep up what you started." He offers him a faint smile, but he was a bit embarrassed he had failed thus far. "Otherwise? I mean...nothing really big honestly? I can tell you all the small things while we eat, if you'd like? None of it is super important, but if you wanna hear I'll share." He doesn't want to bore Loren with all of the tiny little details. There was a small hint of something else, though, like Oliver was waiting to say something.
I JUST WANT MY EXISTENCE TO BE MORE THAN TREMBLING
Glancing around at their surroundings, Loren shrugged. "The living quarters are the smallest portion of the Palace, to be honest. It's mostly the seat of the government, including the military, magical, and religious portions." The facts rolled easily off his tongue, though he looked at Oliver in case the other hybrid had any questions.
The healer shook his head at the other man's question. "Not really." Though the Launceleyn's voice was quiet, Oliver should be able to tell from the bond that Loren was serious about that.
Nodding along with the explanation about what his fellow hybrid had been up to, the healer smiled a bit. "You can tell me, if you'd like." It came out fairly neutral, albeit polite and friendly. Turning another corner, he pushed open a small door, revealing a large kitchens that was currently deserted, though there was the smell of food stewing and baking bread in the air, as well as the sharper sent of mulled cider.
