From being an Abandoned who had rarely left the Hollowed Grounds, to embracing the call of adventure, to dying and being reborn first as an Ascended and then as an Ancient, Maea has gone through quite the amount of changes in her life. One thing remains common, though, in her attempts to find out just where she belongs; she’s always had a craving for knowledge which has brought her to so many places and to meet so many people here in Caido. We can’t wait to see what else is in store for her!
Congratulations, Maea!
Credits
Court of the Fallen was created in October of 2018 by Odd, Honey, and Crooked.
Skinning and hosting by the epically talented Kaons, and functionality fanciness by the coding magic of Neowulf. If you ever see either of them around, make sure to show them some love!
Nodding at Evie's suggestions, Loren smiled at her. It wasn't faint at all this time, and a little bit of the formality and seriousness left him, leaving him looking much more his age. "That's an excellent idea. Would you be willing to help me figure out the best information to include?"
When she mentioned still holding meetings, he nodded again. Then his lips twitched with amusement. "Maybe you'll have better luck than me. People in Halo don't like outsiders, let alone Outlanders, but they might be more willing to respect a natural." Tone wry, he shot her a quick glance, wondering if she'd encountered the same difficulty he had in that regard.
"Of course," she agrees chipperly, excited by the prospect of compiling the most efficient and useful data to be included in their pamphlets. Evie is certainly no artist though, but she knows there's a Guild in the Grounds at least.
"I've noticed it has more sway here, though certainly not as much as a Natural Halovian. It's quite a difference from the Grounds, where the Outlanders were so saturated." Despite the nearly imperceptible bitterness to her tone, Evie doesn't hold a negative stance on the Outlanders. Merely their brutish, narrow minded views that had drowned out the voices of those who'd lived in the barrier their whole lives. Speaking of...
"With the notice that Neron made...will you be staying here for LongNight?" Who needs timelines because she hadn't quite decided herself.
and it's my whole heart while tried and tested, it's mine
As Evie talked about her experiences with the people of Halo, Loren smiled. There was something a bit chagrined about the expression. "As an outsider and an Outlander, I will take all the help and advice I can get."
His features grew more serious. "I really do just want to help the people here. But only in the ways they want." It came out quietly, and it was a far cry from his previous Outlander arrogance of thinking he knew best.
Nodding at her question, he gave her a curious look. "That I am. Are you? I know you have...ties to the Hollowed Ground." Looking away awkwardly, he swallowed, clearly embarrassed about something.
04-19-2020, 02:28 AM (This post was last modified: 04-19-2020, 02:29 AM by Evie.)
EVIE
"If that's what you want, and you express it through actions and listening to what they have to say while giving it more weight and merit than your own," and that was the kicker that most Outlanders couldn't grasp, that show of respect of letting them have more weight while realizing it didn't invalidate your own opinion entirely, "then they will warm to you in time." A small delayed giggle escapes at the unintentional pun, but that's truly all the advice she can give him. He can't change his designation, but he can make his actions count.
His embarrassment is perplexing, and the redhead's brow crinkles as she tries to drum up any particular reason for it. Finding none that jump immediately to the forefront of her mind, she hesitantly replies. "I...admittedly I'm not sure. The idea of not having to deal with the LongNight monsters is more than appealing...but being away from my family, with no news of whether they've survived? For more than the span of LongNight, but an entire season?" Waiting on pins and needles, praying to Gods that will never hear her plea? Alone with her anxiety and her guilt and her terrible potential outcomes? "And I may not be much of a fighter despite how much training I've done with Deimos, but if I could help them with my healing magic, and I'm not there to do it..." She sighs, hands automatically wringing together to try and soothe her restless anxiety. "I've been turning it in my head since the notice was put out."
and it's my whole heart while tried and tested, it's mine
Loren laughed at Evie's pun as well. "I will do my best. My ego will just have to deal." Tone entirely self-deprecating, he gave her a grateful smile.
Expression growing serious as she explained how she was feeling about LongNight, he listened without comment. When she finished, he tentatively laid a hand on her shoulder. "I can't help you make that decision. But I know whichever one you do make, it's the right one."
Then he took a deep breath. "For what it's worth, I think your family, friends, and loved ones would be glad to know you're safe. And seeing as Halo is accepting any and all who wish to stay here for Deepfrost, maybe you can convince those you care about to stay here with you."
"Ego kills more men in Caido than any illness or monster," she agrees lightly, not commenting on his self-deprecation so soon. Is it truly her place? Just how close are they as friends? Evie doesn't want to overstep her boundaries.
"You bring up some good points," and there's gratitude in her tone as she says it. "I just...feel like I'm betraying them somehow. I've lived my entire life in the Grounds, and now I'm in Halo more often than not. And now I'm not there to help with preparation much less staying the entirety of LongNight." An aggrieved sigh leaves her and she shakes her head, copper curls flying about haphazardly. "Sorry I've just been very morose after a conversation with my brother. I seem to be losing more faith and hope in the Gods by the day, and I had little to start." Which is blasphemous to many, but at least she'd rather be honest with him about why she's being such a stick in the mud.
and it's my whole heart while tried and tested, it's mine
Letting out a huff of laughter, Loren nodded at Evie's assessment. "I'll strive not to be one of them." His tone came out wryly, both because he was egotistical and because he had a nasty habit of rushing headlong into danger.
Simply listening to her, he reached out to clasp her shoulder in what he hoped was a reassuring way. Lips twitching in amusement, he let his hand drop. "If you've come for someone to reaffirm your faith, you've come to the wrong person. I'm not particularly beloved by the gods." Obviously he was being self-deprecating again, but he was also telling the truth. "But I'm sorry you have to make this choice. All I can do is say that whatever decision you make will be the right one for you."
Then he scratched the back of his head a bit sheepishly. "How ah, is Sam?" It came out quietly and awkwardly.
Evie hums in a noncommittal fashion, but it's far from a snub towards the man. She can give all the advice she wants until she's blue in the face. Most are not inclined to listen to her, her own family included. Which makes her decision all the harder when she knows both Sam and Amalia are the types to throw themselves right into the proverbial fire.
The squeeze to her shoulder is responded to with a grateful, if watered down, smile. "Certainly not. They've never answered my calls, and the one experience I have is The Voice telling Sam I am Abandoned after hiding it from him my whole life. Shared frustration? Yes. Reaffirmation? I'm not sure if that's even possible." Likely not the best stance to take in a world so dominated by gods and spirits as theirs. But Evie has never been one to walk the beaten path, why start now?
Slow realization comes to her expression at his fumbling question, auburn brows rising in mixed suspicion and incredulity. "Oh please tell me it's not what I think it is." Shakes her head with a wry laugh to ensure he knows she's not truly bothered by whatever entanglement she assumes he had with her twin. "Well, as far as our last meeting. Perhaps a bit directionless, but he always has been in one way or another."
and it's my whole heart while tried and tested, it's mine
Loren gave Evie a sympathetic look. "The Voice basically ignored me the one time I met her, Safrin thinks I'm arrogant, and someone channeled Ludo on me." Then he let out a huff of laughter. "And Frey's the one I've met the most. They think I'm terribly dull and a try-hard. In fact, in the depths of my grief, they called me boring."
Sighing, he ran a hand through his hair. "But they also blessed me and made me into a hybrid. Healed my broken heart and answered my prayers more than once." He shrugged. "The gods aren't kind, nor do they care about us. Not in the way we want." Giving her an understanding look, he smiled faintly. "But they're a part of this world, and I don't think I need to tell you that we can't really avoid them." However, his tone was wry, and he was fully aware of the irony of him, of all people, telling a Natural about the gods.
Letting out a huff of laughter, he scratched the back of his head sheepishly. "We were seeing each other. Don't worry, he called it off when I wasn't ready to fully commit to it. To...him." His lips twisted into a sad smile. "So I'm sorry if I hurt him, and if some of his lack of direction is my fault." Shaking his head a bit sadly, he couldn't quite meet her eyes.
Evie boggles at his succinct descriptions of his encounters with the Gods. "Well. I have to say I'm grateful the most they've done is ignored me then." She has been surrounded by praise of them for so long, it's both affirming and disappointing to hear of the opposite end. The praise (or perhaps gratitude) that he follows up with only makes her more conflicted. Is a God's gift truly worth it when accompanied by such belittlement? Would she do the same, grovel and grit her teeth against the unfairness of it all, if only to receive some measure of power?
She's not sure she would. Her bitterness has lasted an entire lifetime, and Loren is an Outlander. It seems nobody else can understand how she feels which only makes it harder to discern the proper course. "I fully intend to avoid them," she refutes with a cold fire in her blue eyes. "I did not choose to be born Abandoned. Their prejudice has haunted me since I took my first breath. With what you've told me of them, why would I go and be belittled for something as silly and transient as power or purpose?" Evie does not need magic or direction to live a fulfilling life. She's surprised Loren has continued trying at all.
She turns away from the topic with a grit of her teeth, chasing back the deeply rooted injustice that blooms eternal in her breast. Instead she focuses on his admission of having been with Sam. Maybe it's the old adage of "I can hurt my sibling but you can't" but she narrows her eyes slightly at him. "I won't rule either of your relationships, but surely you should have known that Sam does not do anything by half measures. Especially romance." It's the kindest chastisement she can muster while still defending her brother's soft heart. "I'm not the one you should be apologizing to. But of it's over, there's nothing more to say. I hope you can both move on to whatever makes you both happy."
and it's my whole heart while tried and tested, it's mine
Loren shrugged. "Honestly, I haven't had it that bad. I've heard of far worse stories than mine." However, as Evie went on he gave her an understanding look. "And I didn't choose to come to this world at all, let alone as an Abandoned."
He shrugged. "Only seek them out if you want. But...I don't know. They...don't care, really. They're more forces of nature than anything resembling human. In some ways, that makes it...easier. Because I don't expect them to care, one way or another. It's always impersonal." However, his voice was gentle and kind, not judging her for whatever decision she chose to make.
Raising his hands in a placating gesture, he gave her an apologetic smile. "We're both okay with how it ended, I promise. I even have a letter from him if you'd like proof of that."
Evie holds her tongue on the topic of being an Outlander. Her vitriol is not needed against a friend, not in this moment or any others if she can help it. But she is eternally frustrated that so few understand. That they parade around pretending to, empathizing and crooning, and yet they will never know the depth of taboo to being Abandoned as a Natural. "Forces of nature do not have prejudices. Forces of nature do not create an entirely new term for a whole race just to make clear they have Abandoned them. Impersonality only counts if it is fair." She tries to control the heat of her words, to make clear that she's not mad at Loren but at them. That she can't subscribe to his idea of them, not when she is still so bitter.
Instead she focuses on the secondary topic, shaking her head slightly. "No, you're both adults. I won't pry into your private matters any more than I need to as his sister. Though I am curious why you don't feel you can commit to anyone?" Ironic how so many feel that way, and yet Evie has been patiently waiting, content in her solitude but always reaching for a hand to intertwine with her own.
and it's my whole heart while tried and tested, it's mine
Sighing, Loren ran a hand through his hair. "You're right, it's not fair." It came out more sharply than he'd intended, and he gave Evie an apologetic smile. "But the world, and the people and beings in it, don't care how unfair it all is. Nor do they care about our complaints." This time, his tone was much gentler and certainly much more understanding.
Biting his lip, he rubbed his hands together nervously. "I lost someone I loved." His mouth twisted into a grimace as sorrow even now, after all this time, stole into his eyes. "And it has left me wary of letting anyone into my heart again. But that...the fear is fading a little bit more every day." Managing to muster up a smile from somewhere, he paused by an entrance to the Palace.
"I've already taken up more of your time than I intended. Thank you, again, for agreeing to help me with my duties." Reaching out, he laid a hand on her shoulder. "And whatever you decide, for next season, I understand." With that, he nodded and took his leave of her.
His understanding tone helps soothe her helplessly raised hackles, and her expression takes on an apologetic tinge at her reaction. They're relatively aligned in their thoughts and opinions, and there's no real joy or satisfaction on her side in being pedantic. Instead she abides with an understanding tilt of her crown, nodding slightly.
Loren's mention of loss has more draw on her attention, empathy softening the corners of her eyes previously tightened with stress over the previous topic. "It takes time to heal. It's certainly not a race. I'm sorry that you lost someone so dear to you." Perhaps if they were closer she would have reached for his hand or elbow, or perhaps put an arm around his shoulders. Loss is a familiar friend to the Naturals, and to the Outlanders who had been thrust into their chaotic world without any warning or experience to help shield them.
"Anytime," she assures, the warmth of her smile strengthening back to its normal amount. And with an amicable wave, they part ways and she ventures off into the snowy town to do her own necessary shopping.
- FIN
and it's my whole heart while tried and tested, it's mine
