step into the open air

don't you know i'm no good for you?

Her hand extends a small amount before it drops, and internally there’s some form of relief that she remembers what Ronin has told her. “Good.” He hums to her before he goes to stand, listening for Loren’s retort, feeling the unhappiness and frankly not caring one bit about it. I meant that I want to say I’m surprised that you think I’m her father. Y’know, somehow having to conceive her likely when I was... committed. He explains, voice thickly accented here yet still muted, still dull, trailing off.

There is a pulse of surprise beneath the bond at what Seren says, a shake of his head with a snort, pushing away the sorrowful thoughts for now. She’s just arrived recently. I’m not sure she knows what a best friend is. I imagine I’m more of the uncle type but whatever. He adds in quickly, though his gaze remains on Loren like a hawk when he kneels beside Seren.

“You can tell him.” He rumbles toward Seren, gaze flickering toward the little girl, knowing nothing of what might have happened between Loren and Ronin.

i've learned to lose, you can't afford to

SUNJATA

Seren

I am magnet for all kinds of deeper wonderment
Destined to seek, destined to know

The show of approval was just as small as the touch had been, yet by the way she brightened, Sunjata could just as well haven given her the most precious gift in the world. Seren was eager to please, learned quickly and generally a very uncomplicated child; it really didn't take much to earn a place in her heart.

It was Loren's turn to kneel this time, and his comment reminded her of where they had been in the conversation before Sunjata appeared. The girl glanced up at her self-appointed best friend, then turned back when he left it to her to reply.

"Oh!" she exclaimed, "I forgot. My dad's name is Ronin. My full name is Seren Taliesin." She only stumbled a little on the long last name. The pride was no smaller now than when she had announced her mother's name. Seren looked closely at Loren, expecting a good reaction to the announcement.

I am a princess on the way to my throne
Destined to reign, destined to roam

Despite the situation, Loren couldn't help sending a pulse of amusement towards Sunjata. She's a demi-god. Fuck if I know how they're conceived. Indeed, the healer was completely confused by Safrin, which was evident from the way he looked between Seren and the bartender.

The Launceleyn's amusement grew at the other man's almost embarrassed response. Just take the complement. However, Loren's understanding filtered through their link.

There was definitely not a good reaction to the announcement. In fact, he actually blanched, and found himself rocking back, falling onto his ass. "What?" His shock and dismay was evident.

Scrambling to his feet, he stared at Seren for a long moment. Then he looked around almost fearfully, and definitely nervously. Astra crept to his side, and her presence calmed him. "Sorry. I just...sorry. You surprised me, is all." He bit his lip, then forced himself to meet the girl's gaze and smile, though it definitely didn't reach his eyes.

"It was very nice to meet you, Seren, but I have to go now. Be good for Sunjata?" Silently, he told Sunjata, I swear. I swear to you I didn't know. Tell Ronin that, please. There was something almost desperate behind the thought, and though he wasn't afraid, per se, he very much wanted to be anywhere else.

you are lost, hope is gone

but you must go on

Loren

Base Code by Sky!

don't you know i'm no good for you?

I’m pretty sure it’s the usual way when it comes to Safrin. He replies truly, a pant of experience with having kissed the goddess twice now. But he ignores the idea of a compliment in favor for watching Seren reply to Loren — stumbling over the last name in a way that makes him rather amused. Loren’s response on the other hand has him raising a brow, inching a bit closer, hands lowering to rest one on Seren’s shoulder, brows furrowing together.

What the hell, Loren? He asks, shifting to turn in his step to focus on Seren again. “He gets easily surprised, it’s okay.” He assures her, flashing a grin, though a brighter pulse of annoyance is sent toward Loren — again, not knowing the history between the two other men. He looks back toward Loren with a bit more of a narrowed gaze, more focus. “They’re my neighbor, now.” He offers by way of explanation of how he’s involved, why he had come seeking the girl out in the long run.

i've learned to lose, you can't afford to

SUNJATA

Seren

I am magnet for all kinds of deeper wonderment
Destined to seek, destined to know

She had hoped for surprise, a touch of awe perhaps, and recognition of her father who obviously had to be as important in the eyes of everyone else as he was to her.

But Loren flew to his feet like she had said something bad, like he was almost scared, and it made a strange feeling grow in her stomach. Like the opposite of the happy lightness she had made before. It pulsed from her in a wave of heaviness, and Sunjata who had come to stand by her feel it too, as if the weight of everything had suddenly trippled. Pinning both him and the small girl in place.

It lasted only for a moment. Sunjata's hands on her shoulder made the unease fade, and Seren turned eyes on Loren that were terribly sad. "You don't like my daddy?" she asked him. "You do not have to go already." Not like this, when it felt as though he was running away. From her?

I am a princess on the way to my throne
Destined to reign, destined to roam

Sunjata's question was met with a heated response from Loren. Ronin and Remi both hate me, so I'm pretty sure they won't want me hanging out with their latest miracle daughter. It was out equally parts angry and annoyed.

However, at Seren's words he stilled completely. For a long moment he said nothing, just stood there, swaying a bit. Then he sighed. "I like your dad just fine." Kneeling, he gave her another sad smile.

"But I hurt him, and his husband, very, very badly. So badly that it's unforgivable. He's absolutely right to feel that way, and it is definitely entirely my fault." He took a deep breath. "My fault, okay? Not his, and definitely not yours." That came out with as much certainty as he could muster

Rubbing suddenly sweaty palms on his thighs, he looked about again before returning his gaze to the girl. "He would be unhappy if he found out we were hanging out, though, and I can't say he'd be wrong to feel that way. And you don't want your daddy to be upset, do you?" He sent an almost desperate plea for help through his bond with the bartender, more sensation and emotion than actual coherent thought.

you are lost, hope is gone

but you must go on

Loren

Base Code by Sky!

don't you know i'm no good for you?

If Sunjata had been shifted, there absolutely would have been some pinning of his ears for the response he receives through the bond. His gaze narrows on Loren a bit more, jaw clenching lightly. Did you have to fucking react like that though? He replies back, similar heat to the words. Sunjata might not be fatherly material or want to be anywhere close to it, but he certainly does know a thing or two about how children might perceive things that abrupt.

But suddenly, he feels a tightness in his step, a sort of heaviness cascade toward his feet that feels almost like it’s threatening to pull him through the earth. Another clench of his jaw as his hand reaches for Seren’s and Loren’s words reach the air between them. Nor did you have to explain everything to her. I’m sure it’s enough for her to find out when she’s older. He adds with a bit more bite to his tone.

He keeps his hand on Seren’s shoulder though, gaze flickering down toward the girl despite the feeling that gets lifted when he offers that small touch. “It’s okay Seren.” He repeats toward her, shifting a small amount in his step to focus back on the girl, feeling the plea of help from Loren and deciding whether or not he wants to help. “He can explain it better when you’re older.” He offers the girl another softer smile, though it’s edged with a bit of frustration slipping through. “Do you want to take Haai and start going down the path to home? I think it's almost lunch time.” He offers, just as a distraction, a way to get the girl to go away for a brief moment hopefully out of earshot.

i've learned to lose, you can't afford to

SUNJATA

Seren

I am magnet for all kinds of deeper wonderment
Destined to seek, destined to know

It wasn't okay, and Seren knew it was right to think so precisely because of the way Sunjata's voice softened and became reassuring. There really was something to be upset about here, and germs and whiskey smells didn't matter one bit; she inched back until she could press her back against Sunjata's leg, in desperate need of the warm, solid support as she struggled to accept what Loren said.

He hurt Father? And Remi? They didn't like him... and that meant she couldn't be friends with Loren either? But she did like him, so... was she already hurting Father without even knowing?

It was a bit too much for her undeveloped emotions to handle. Sunjata offered her an escape route, by mentioning lunch and Haai, and without saying anything, the girl nodded. Reaching for the winged wolf, she buried a small hand in the dark fur, and began to walk off towards the path that would take her home.

After a few steps she turned, and waved a small gesture of goodbye to Loren. He had healed her, after all. And she didn't actually want to say bye bye like this.

But it was quite difficult to be Seren all of a sudden.

I am a princess on the way to my throne
Destined to reign, destined to roam

At Sunjata's words and the way Seren shied away, Loren deflated. Still kneeling, he looked even sadder than he had, and tears once again sprang to his eyes, though he refused to let them fall. "I'm sorry. I really didn't mean to upset or confuse you." The guilt on his face and in his voice was apparent.

Silently, he sent a sorrowful thought to the bartender. I'm sorry. I fucked up. I'll stay away, promise. From Seren, from Ronin, from Remi, from Sunjata, the healer didn't specify, because honestly he didn't know. Probably all of the above.

He stayed right where he was , though, as the girl followed the griffin. Watching her, he waved sadly, then glanced up at the other man. I know. I'm an asshole.

you are lost, hope is gone

but you must go on

Loren

Base Code by Sky!

don't you know i'm no good for you?

Seren steps back against him for some form of solid support, and he gives it to her – despite the discomfort it might bring. She likely needs it better than he does now – having found his vices already. But none of it seemed to make sense to Seren in a way that she could process, and so he lets her go with Haai – the griffin content to wag her feathery tail toward the girl while they walked to try and brighten her mood.

Sunjata, meanwhile, is less than amused with the results of what’s occurred.

His gaze sharply returns to Loren, one hand moving to rub against the tattooed wrist to try and itch it without actually scratching at it, focusing on the words that leave him from the attuned bond. There’s a slight grimace to that, gaze narrowing. Look, we’re all going through our shit. He says sharply, shadows crossing into his gaze. Maea just died and if I can hold it together enough around her to make her think that life’s going just fine, the least you can do is the same. He reaches up to run a hand through his hair.

“So if you need to find me or meet with me or whatever, send me a letter and I’ll meet you at the Kraai or at the boxing ring in Haulani. Just, I think it’s best you don’t come to the house for a while, deal?” He offers, out loud, focusing on Loren as the summoner remains kneeling in the grasses.

i've learned to lose, you can't afford to

SUNJATA

Staying silent as Sunjata admonished Loren, he just nodded mutely, still kneeling on the hard ground. When the bartender finished, the healer swallowed. Luckily, the other man couldn't make the Launceleyn feel worse than he already did. "Deal." It came out hoarsely, and he closed his eyes and took a deep breath.

When he opened them he rose to his feet. "I won't be a problem. Or in her life at all." With that, he turned to go. However, he only got a few steps away before he stumbled to a stop.

I'm not going to call on you. But...if you need me, for any reason, even just to talk, or not talk, or whatever, I'll be there. With that, he resumed walking, almost in a daze. Only Astra's nudges kept him on the path back to the portal.

you are lost, hope is gone

but you must go on

Loren

Base Code by Sky!

Seren

I am magnet for all kinds of deeper wonderment
Destined to seek, destined to know

Short legs didn't carry her very far, but the silence behind was very heavy. Enough so that it made Seren wonder if the men weren't actually speaking to each other, in a way she just couldn't hear.

After a little while, she turned to look back, to see if Sunjata was coming. Loren was still sitting in the grass, and she wondered at how small he seemed. Even though he was a grownup.

She recalled him saying he was sad about losing his friend. If it felt anything like how her tummy ached right now...

I am a princess on the way to my throne
Destined to reign, destined to roam

don't you know i'm no good for you?

There’s a nod given to Loren at the comment that he wouldn’t be around – something like a sigh of relief almost for if he did ever end up having to explain to Ronin what might have happened – still unaware but able to guestimate between the comments Loren had made and knowing what he did. So he steps back when Loren stands to his feet, watching the summoner as he goes to leave. Sunjata turns away too, hearing the response from Loren with a pang to his gut, jaw clenching once again.

But he doesn’t respond, not as he shifts to his macaw form once more and pushes off from the grasses with wide wings to head toward Seren. The girl has turned back now, and Haai remains a touch away from her as Sunjata nears, shifting back into himself and landing rather heavily in the ground a small ways from the path as he moves to take those typical long strides to catch up. “What should we get for lunch?” He asks quietly, trying to mask up that pang within him to focus on something else.

i've learned to lose, you can't afford to

SUNJATA

Seren

I am magnet for all kinds of deeper wonderment
Destined to seek, destined to know

The men parted, Loren's figure walking away while Sunjata's shimmered and changed into the blue bird. He came flying on quiet wings, and Seren managed a small smile when he changed back into himself and landed in the grass not far away.

Truth be told, there wasn't much room in her stomach for lunch, with all the worry and sad there to cram it full. "Maybe just a sandwich?," she said anyway, knowing there was no point in trying to skip meals.

Seren gazed up at the man, tall and dark and brooding. They were very similar and very different - it wouldn't be a stretch to guess at some relation of blood between them - but it was with the quiet sadness in his eyes and voice she connected most in this moment.

"Loren said he was sad because his friend died," Seren said. "Did you know her too? Are you sad too?" There was a lot of it going around, in the eyes of everyone around her. Seren wasn't blind, she knew something wasn't right. With Father, with Remi, with Sunjata...

Oh, how she wished she could bring them comfort.

I am a princess on the way to my throne
Destined to reign, destined to roam