Aurelia
I wanna heal, I wanna feel
like I'm close to something real
like I'm close to something real
"Yeah," she purses her lips and clenches her jaw, though, because, "I mean, I don't really want to but... I should figure out how to use it, and control it..." Let's face it, Aurelia didn't ask for this, either. Well... any of this, actually. She didn't ask to grow up poor, or for both of her parents to die, leaving her the sole provider of her younger sisters, for the world to be so cruel that it left her no choice but to become cruel, too, just to survive.
It feels like such a shitty reason, now, but even as the thought takes shape, she can't catch hold of it. She's far too exhausted to face these things now - at least, more than she already has tonight. These steps she's taken are in the right direction, at least, and she can rest a little easier knowing that. Can rest a little easier now that Milo knows everything.
To actually air her guilt, her truths, felt... cleansing in a way that's hard for her to describe. Between all those years of intensity and being in constant fight or flight, she's never faced herself. And she knows there are more obstacles that lay ahead, ones of her own design and ones of this world, but at least... she has him.
And she nods, agrees to the desensitization, even though it sounds like such a medical term that it's off-putting. She'll try anything, if only it means she can make this up to him and not fuck it up one day. But for now, she's tired, and all she wants to do is sleep. The rest can be figured out later, because in the morning she won't have to begin again. Instead, she can keep going, keep pushing on, keep working at this.
fin.
It feels like such a shitty reason, now, but even as the thought takes shape, she can't catch hold of it. She's far too exhausted to face these things now - at least, more than she already has tonight. These steps she's taken are in the right direction, at least, and she can rest a little easier knowing that. Can rest a little easier now that Milo knows everything.
To actually air her guilt, her truths, felt... cleansing in a way that's hard for her to describe. Between all those years of intensity and being in constant fight or flight, she's never faced herself. And she knows there are more obstacles that lay ahead, ones of her own design and ones of this world, but at least... she has him.
And she nods, agrees to the desensitization, even though it sounds like such a medical term that it's off-putting. She'll try anything, if only it means she can make this up to him and not fuck it up one day. But for now, she's tired, and all she wants to do is sleep. The rest can be figured out later, because in the morning she won't have to begin again. Instead, she can keep going, keep pushing on, keep working at this.
fin.
I wanna find something I've wanted all along
somewhere to belong
somewhere to belong
code credits go to Skylark!<3
