From being an Abandoned who had rarely left the Hollowed Grounds, to embracing the call of adventure, to dying and being reborn first as an Ascended and then as an Ancient, Maea has gone through quite the amount of changes in her life. One thing remains common, though, in her attempts to find out just where she belongs; she’s always had a craving for knowledge which has brought her to so many places and to meet so many people here in Caido. We can’t wait to see what else is in store for her!
Congratulations, Maea!
Credits
Court of the Fallen was created in October of 2018 by Odd, Honey, and Crooked.
Skinning and hosting by the epically talented Kaons, and functionality fanciness by the coding magic of Neowulf. If you ever see either of them around, make sure to show them some love!
Wessex's surprise surprised Cam in turn, but they returned her smile, tentatively. Wessex seemed to approve of Cam's reaching out to the Voice, of their potential Ascension, and that was comforting. They didn't know what they would have done, what they would have felt, if she had immediately shot them down.
Tradeoffs: "I know the Ascended can't taste, can't feel certain things ... can't walk in the sun. And I know, well, a lot of people hate them -- you, sorry. Are there other things I should be aware of?" They'd already discussed this with Nate, and they felt like they might be forgetting something in the list of side effects, but they wanted to hear Wessex's take too.
"That's a good reason," Cam said, nodding. They didn't think of themself as sick, exactly, but maybe they should -- they knew how bad they could get, off medication, or just when they'd been on the wrong medication. They'd gone through so many different pills over the last 10 years before they'd finally found some that worked.
"I'm not sure, honestly. It ... definitely seems like a big choice, one that I'm a little nervous about making." "A little nervous" was an understatement. If someone had put them on the spot about it, they would have panicked; they only coped now by regarding it as a distant hypothetical, rather than an immediate reality. "Something about having my body changed in such a fundamental way is ... terrifying. But I've never been very comfortable in my body to begin with. There are some things about it that really appeal to me, actually -- I've always wished I didn't have to eat, for example."
cameron ?
"Cameras" by Ennev is licensed under CC BY-NC-SA 2.0
Nibbling at the back of her lip, Wessex fights the urge to sugarcoat everything - when the truth is that there are some changes she wishes weren’t included.
“Right. There are some things to think about like - you won’t be able to get drunk or high anymore and you won’t be able to have sex unless you’re in this special room in the Grounds. There’s pleasure from biting, but it’s not the same as an orgasm.” Did they have this kind of friendship / relationship? Well, they do now, as Wessex barrels right through normal conversational barriers.
“But you can see in the dark. And you’ll be twice as fast. No more headaches. Or anxious nausea. No more pain at all, really, or being hot or cold… no need to breathe, so you can swim as far as you want without coming up for air.” Her lips purse, thinking about other common complaints. “But yeah, for awhile you’ll be pretty weak during the day. It sucks, but it’s something we’ve all been through.”
Looking at her hands, she rubs them against each other, looking at Cameron with a soft smile. “But we have a unique sort of family, here. Unlike any of the other races. We’re all very different, but there’s this… unspoken bond for many of us.” They might like that. Or not. But it’s clear that Wessex has a deep affection for her fellow Ascended.
there was a time that we were kind, but now don't write me, you're not fooling anyone
Cameron nodded as Wessex went through her list of pros and cons. Drinking, drugs, sex: none of them were things Cam had enjoyed at home, so they didn't mind cutting off those possibilities. And, whatever they might think about the "pleasure from biting someone," they didn't intend to try it out anytime soon. (And yeah, maybe they would have been flustered by the mention of sex, but Wessex's brisk tone made it feel more like a discussion with a doctor than something illicit.)
"No pain, no temperature, no headaches, no breathing ... Those sound like some strong advantages to me." Cam tried a smile, though it was a little awkward. "And I've always been a bit of a night owl anyway."
Honestly, Wessex's words encouraged Cam, made them feel like Ascending might actually be a good idea. Even if it was drastic -- the benefits seemed drastic too. They'd spent too much of their life with a headache, or some kind of body ache, or too sweaty, or too cold, or ... and so on. To leave it all behind, to finally have a body that obeyed them rather than imprisoned them ... It sounded good.
And so did the idea of the Ascended as a family. Cam nodded at that too, adding, "There aren't very many Ascended, right?"
cameron ?
"Cameras" by Ennev is licensed under CC BY-NC-SA 2.0
She can’t help the grin that sweeps across her face as she crosses her arms, suddenly a little more relaxed than she’s ever been with them. “Well, with that kind of outlook, I’m sure you’ll be just fine!” A throaty chuckle makes her pause briefly, before, “Our Lady will help you make yourself into whatever and whoever you want to be.” At the very least, and perhaps, maybe a bit beyond what they think they might need.
She doesn’t even have to take the time to count, answering their question with a shrug. “Fifteen, including myself, who are willing to be included in the family. I’ve no doubt there are others who seek a quiet life and let them be. We’ve had some older Ascended pop up recently - those who somehow survived the first war. And then those who were brought back to life.” Settling again into a thoughtful stance, she glances out the window.
“We’re really quite varied, when you think about it. Something I’ve always liked about us.”
Even when it drives her crazy and she feels like she's utterly alone, Wessex is proud of them for being who they are.
there was a time that we were kind, but now don't write me, you're not fooling anyone
Cameron couldn't help being a bit surprised by Wessex's enthusiasm, but they answered it with a grin of their own. "That sounds great. I really appreciate it."
Even if they weren't quite sure who -- or what -- they wanted to be. They felt secure, now, that the Voice could and would help them, whether that was through Ascension or something else. And Ascension sounded like a pretty cool option, honestly, even if it was also quite intimidating. Also -- they were honored that Wessex seemed to like them, to approve of their thoughts, even to want them as part of her family. Wessex seemed like one of the coolest people they'd ever met -- self-assured, capable -- and having her treat them as an equal, as a comrade, made Cam feel important in a way they weren't accustomed to.
Cam nodded as Wessex spoke of her family. The low number was a little scary, in a way -- so few, so precarious, and Cam instinctively realized that in such a small group, there would be no anonymity to protect them from scrutiny, no crowd to blend into. But maybe that was a good thing, actually. Maybe here, accepted by their new family, there would be no need to hide.
"The first war?" they asked, and then: "Wait, when you say 'older' ... how old?"
Nobody had ever told Cam that Ascended didn't age, but it made sense, if they thought about the whole "vampire" thing.
cameron ?
"Cameras" by Ennev is licensed under CC BY-NC-SA 2.0
Wessex knows she’s able to take quirks like people being over three hundred years old in stride, because there were a couple of Ascended already who were far older than she was - 108 (a number, only, the year she Ascended) and Kristopher, who was… well, she can’t remember, but it was older than she was.
Something thrills her a bit - probably just being able to shock them when not much seems to shock her - and she smiles out of the corner of her mouth a bit. “At least three hundred and twelve. Not certain of the specifics, I’m not really one to ask about exact ages.” Dipping her head, she pauses a moment before looking back up at them.
“The first war is a longer story, though. It’s what caused the barrier, the Grounds’ isolation - the Old Gods’ first attempt at wiping out the Ascended and getting rid of the Voice. And they couldn’t succeed then, so now they want to try again. At least that’s the short version.”
Something changes in her and she seems a bit sadder now, even though she's been talking about the war for seasons now, and with multiple people, the prospect of it doesn't change her dismay about it. Sometimes her resilience cracks.
there was a time that we were kind, but now don't write me, you're not fooling anyone
"Wow," Cam said. On one hand, that didn't seem that old, for immortals -- but on the other hand, that was older than the entire country Cam came from, so ... yeah, that was old. And also cool. They were going to have to take some time -- later -- to wrap their head around the concept of immortality, around the idea that they could achieve immortality. They'd always been afraid of dying: not so much the fact of death, but the total oblivion they envisioned coming after, since they were an atheist. The idea of weakening and losing themself to old age. But if they Ascended, they didn't have to worry about that ... It made the already appealing idea even more alluring.
At the description of the war, though, Cam frowned, wrinkling their nose in distaste. "They just can't abide anyone not worshiping them, huh? What happened to 'live and let live'?"
Then again, such ideas of tolerance had probably never existed in Caido. Cam's own world had seen enough religious violence; they couldn't imagine how much worse it might be here, with real and tangible gods actively encouraging their followers to wipe out the "heathens."
cameron ?
"Cameras" by Ennev is licensed under CC BY-NC-SA 2.0
“Yeah,” Wessex agrees with a small arch of her brows. “Cal is really a fount of knowledge about the world back then. It’s incredible.” And the one most likely to talk about it, whereas Aamu… she’s sure he has his reasons and he’s trying to let them be. Death seems to have muddled his memories, too, and the Wraith just doesn’t press as much as she used to.
“It’s not just that, it’s that the Voice took too much from them and sought to call herself their equal. And if she can do it, why not others? It’s why they’re cruel to Abandoned now, because theoretically, one of them could become powerful enough to do it again.” Or so she thinks.
“Anyway -” Wessex is about to take her leave when there’s a knock on the door and Daphne pokes her head in. Which is a convenient exit point for the Queen. She nods and turns back to Cameron. “Let me know if you need anything. Really. Otherwise - I hope you find the answers you’re looking for with the Voice.” She offers them a fanged smile before she departs out the back door, leaving Daphne to show them back out.
{Fin}
there was a time that we were kind, but now don't write me, you're not fooling anyone
