without you things go hazy

walked out this morning and i wrote down this song.
i just can't remember who to send it to

It's maddening to try and force himself to relax while wanting nothing more than to tense up in anticipation, as if the steel of his muscles might somehow hurry the Star along. He doesn't want him to hurry though; much as Remi loves and hates the tension that covers him just as completely as Ronin does, this is a first unlike any other that the pair has experienced, and he'll not blunder his way through it for anything.  But gods if the sweetness of Ronin's lips against his doesn't make him long for fingertips to leave bruises against his skin and for their headboard to threaten to break with the motion of their bodies.

"It is only you, for m—." Remi's lips part in a sharp O as his lashes flutter and the green of his eyes disappears behind his eyelids. With toes curling against the sheets, the alchemist exhales a growl as his eyes flash open. Going slow now seems laughable; perhaps that's why the alchemist's hand slides against his husband's hip, forbidding the Star from suddenly plunging in too deep.

'I want to feel every moment of this." Remi explains as his hips shift upward slightly and the pressure against Ronin's side increases, encouraging the Star in bit by bit. Every inch is wrought with pleasure and the desperate need for more. With cheeks aflame with colour and eyes that shine brightly, Remi reaches up to clasp a hand against the Star's cheek as wordless I love yous spill from lips quickly losing the ability to speak.

we shall heal our wounds, collect our dead

Remi's guidance is both looked for and appreciated, because even though Ronin feels the same, his body has other ideas, and with the alchemist's voice cut short with pleasure, he needs all the restraint he can muster. "Only you for me," he finishes, the words little more than an airy breath against his husband's cheek, and the arm braced over the Lullaby is clutching the bedding tightly enough to turn his knuckles white. "Only you for every moment of this."

And so, with Remi's name as a half whispered plea against his skin, Ronin eases himself in, slowly, exquisitely careful with every shift of his hips, until with a breathless moan, he leans his cheek against the Lullaby's hand. It has been so long, and somehow this feels forbidden in all the best of ways. Ronin finds himself smiling, in fact, leaning in for a gentle kiss even as his hips rock and move, just as slow as before, to fully enjoy everything they've given up for so long, everything they can indulge in now.

THE DARK STAR

and continue fighting

walked out this morning and i wrote down this song.
i just can't remember who to send it to

"Well, I should hope so—" Remi manages, though his voice is tight with anticipation, rather than playful as he'd intended it to be. Ronin will likely feel the way Remi's jaw feathers against his own as the Star slips further inside of him. Laughter, or something like it, builds up in the back of the alchemist's throat and it's a breathless sort of pant he exhales against his husband's shoulder to find himself filled in a way he's been desperately craving.

It both feels like sex, but also doesn't. Or at least, not the sort of sex that they usually have. There is a closeness in this that the pair have only recently realized they'd been missing. A connection they'd forgotten they needed. So although Remi's legs raise to wrap around Ronin that his entire lower half might rock along with the Star's motions, he has absolutely no inclination to dig his heels in to spur his partner on. (Well, he absolutely has some inclination, just not one he's bothered to act on).

Rising up into the kiss and melting into the sweetness of it, Remi's body gives an involuntary shiver as Ronin brushes up against the bundle of nerves that promises better things yet to come. "I feel like I could stay like this for hours." Remi whispers, much to the disapproval of his own erection, pinned between he and the Star as it is. "Gods, I really do love you." He adds, boyishly flustered and overwhelming in love.

we shall heal our wounds, collect our dead

Remi's legs lock around him and Ronin hums a note of bliss into their kiss, as if this is the real thing he's been craving all along. And it is, gods it is, the Star smiling despite himself even while his lips part in a soft gasp as they find their rhythm, however slow and indulgent as it might be. "Hours?" He smiles, and though the expression on his face is playfully disbelieving, the gentle kiss he steals from Remi's lips pledges to go that long if that's what the Lullaby wants.

It's a gross overestimation of what he's capable of, with the alchemist all around him and the world bleeding into little more than the steady pound of his heartbeat and the fire that ignites wherever they touch... but the thought is there.

"I'm yours," he mumbles through the kisses he's trailing along Remi's jaw, his voice tight where he's battling to keep his pace slow and measured, because fuck if it isn't entirely worth it. "I'm all yours, Remi." In the past, perhaps he'd have gone further with it, professed for Remi to command anything of him, to do anything with him. But finally he has realised the danger in those statements, the way they promised things that neither man could fulfill.

But he is the Lullaby's, body and soul, whatever their differences.

THE DARK STAR

and continue fighting

walked out this morning and i wrote down this song.
i just can't remember who to send it to

"Maybe that's a bit optimistic." Remi mumbles with breathless joy. No, they couldn't stay like this for hours, but could they stay this close? Remi would find a way. Now more than ever, he never wanted any distance between them again.

While Ronin's naive vows of love are stayed by rationality, Remi's are choked off by the moans that surge between the sips of air he's forced to take. His breathing is growing more ragged than he'd like and despite his every intention to keep things slow, he can't seem to help the way his hips rise off of the bed; the angle increases the friction against his own erection, sandwiched between their bodies as it is, and also how deeply Ronin is able to thrust. Both have Remi's eyes rolling back in his head, and even as his back arcs and stretches, the alchemist doesn't feel like he's chasing. Breathless and panting though he might be, (and being on the bottom certainly helps), Remi is more than content to let the fireworks of his orgasm light themselves.

Having confessed and reaffirmed his love for the Star more than enough this night, Remi finds his lips dancing between silent laughter and fluttering encouraging kisses against whatever part of Ronin is within reach. Every thrust brings them closer together, and every second Ronin moves away is one that sparks joyful and decadent anticipation. "I'm close...but I still want it slow."

we shall heal our wounds, collect our dead

Remi arches up and it makes it even more difficult for Ronin to keep his nerve - to keep from throwing himself into things until it's over before it's even begun. Anything he tries to say is mumbled into the soft flesh of Remi's neck, between kisses and moans and declarations of love. Like his husband, he doesn't find himself seeking anything out, chasing the high he knows will come from the climax - quite the opposite in fact. Given that he's on top, he has much more control over how things go, but gods if he doesn't want to give all that up to just drown in the moment.

"You have no right to feel so good," he groans, fingers clutching at Remi's thigh as if to hitch him closer still, and although things are slow, it doesn't stop the thunder of his pulse or the beads of sweat that glitter down the length of his spine. And when Remi speaks? "Then that's what you'll get," Ronin mumbles, already able to feel his orgasm start to build like an itch in the balls of his feet, in the way that the Lullaby suddenly feels like electricity in his arms. It's like the moment between the spark of lightning and the roll of thunder, and the Star's breath catches in his throat.

"Gods, Remi--" He's barely hanging on, his forehead pressing against his husband's shoulder.

THE DARK STAR

and continue fighting

walked out this morning and i wrote down this song.
i just can't remember who to send it to

Remi can only grin—or gasp, he isn't sure which—against the top of Ronin's shoulder. Fire floods his veins as waves of pleasure and love slosh between his ribs. It makes him feel like he's floating, which perhaps explains why his legs suddenly tense around Roni or why his fingertips are clutching for purchase against sweat-slick skin.  'Non fermarti—' He whispers as if saying the words too loudly might somehow shove them off the tightrope they walk. Falling would be bliss, Remi knows, because down that way is the promise of an orgasm. But for once the alchemist doesn't want to crash into it; he wants to fly.

'Nnn, don't...stop..' His hips roll effortlessly as one of Remi's hands slides down Ronin's lower back, wanting to cause as much pressure between them as possible. Remi knows with just the barest touches of his hand he could make himself cum, but gods it almost seems worth it to let his orgasm pass him by to keep his hands on the Star.

we shall heal our wounds, collect our dead

Every touch is torture and bliss rolled into one; every stroke of Remi's fingers, every gasp against his shoulder, and Ronin throws himself into the sweetness of the moment. By now they are usually entwined with one another in chaos and passion, in the sound of skin on skin, or the slam of a headboard against a wall. But here things are still slow and recklessly indulgent, even as the Star feels his climax beginning to creep up on him.

"I don't know if I can--" He gasps out, his hand sliding down to squeeze at Remi's ass, to clutch him closer that every thrust might get that little bit deeper. It's not that he doesn't know if he can stop as much as he doesn't know if he can hold on, Ronin all but overcome by the pleasure that begins to crackle through the base of his spine and up towards the back of his throat.

It's only a few moments more when he does cum, a delicious shudder running through him, his hips driving forward and anchoring against Remi as he's thrown headfirst into the madness of it all.

THE DARK STAR

and continue fighting

walked out this morning and i wrote down this song.
i just can't remember who to send it to

"Then don't." Remi means to sound reassuring, but the words are all but growled into his husband's shoulder. "Slow does not mean—" But it doesn't matter what it means anymore, because already he can feel the telltale signs of his husband's orgasm all around him—and as Ronin hugs Remi closer, the alchemist feels his own, as well.

Remi cums with Ronin's name on his lips and his heartbeat thundering out an unsustainable rhythm. This time though it isn't accompanied by muttered curses or white-knuckled grips against the headboard, and Remi finds that he's more able to ride-out the wave of pleasure Ronin has set him on more fully. With toes that curl and tingle, Remi's lungs are left to deal with whatever hasty sip of air the alchemist last breathed as he lets himself rise and fall into the last shivers of bliss.

His eyes are closed—have they been the whole time? Remi doesn't know—and it's with slow fingers that have all but forgotten how to move that the alchemist slips them into the Star's hair and across his back. 'I do not even know what to say.' Half-thoughts sparkle in Remi's mind—let's find our own island and run away, let's never leave this bed, let's get married again—but none of it truly captures how he's feeling. And so, with a slow smile, Remi lets his head loll softly against his husband's. "I do not believe I have ever been happier."

we shall heal our wounds, collect our dead

Even though, compared to their other escapades, this has been comparatively low key (missionary and everything), Ronin doesn't think he can slow the thunder of his heart or the way he pants for breath. There's a smile on his lips that Remi will feel rather than see, and he hums out a note of utter contentment to feel the other man's fingers in his hair. "We don't need to say anything," he mumbles, though that doesn't mean he doesn't relish hearing the words tumble from his husband's lips anyway.

"That was worth the wait," he manages eventually, shifting up enough to look down at the Lullaby, brushing his nose against Remi's and seeming unable to wipe the smile off his face. "I don't think I can let you go, though," he says apologetically. He'll keep the other man wrapped around him to go and make coffee, to sit and chat further about Torchline, to shower, to fall into bed again. Everything - Ronin doesn't care.

THE DARK STAR

and continue fighting

walked out this morning and i wrote down this song.
i just can't remember who to send it to

With a boyish laugh that ruins the moment as much as it adds to it, Remi snorts against Ronin's shoulder. "Can you imagine if it wasn't?" And really, who could have blamed them, if one had cum too fast, if the moment had been interrupted, if Ronin accidentally set the house on fire. "I am glad to hear it, because I do not plan on being let go." Remi counters with a grin that suddenly turns crooked. "Though it would be easier if I could still be a raccoon. Alas, you will have to make do with me as I am."

Story of their lives; things could be easier, but they would make do.

"I know the world might as well be on fire, but right now I am so happy and content I can hardly bring myself to ask, but..are things with Sunjata alright, now? Are we avoiding Torchline? Are we taking over Torchline?"

we shall heal our wounds, collect our dead

"Oh gods, don't." Ronin is laughing as well, cutting himself off with a kiss to the corner of Remi's mouth. "We don't need to worry about that any more at least. I confess, it was starting to play on my mind, whether I'd be able to..." Anything, really, given how close he's found himself just with the friction against his pants during some of their comparatively innocent makeout sessions. But no - they'd come back with a bang - and then some.

"Make do?" He shakes his head, shifting to kiss Remi properly again. His lips are soft, his tongue gentle, but nothing at all about it suggests that he finds carrying Remi around making do. Indeed, Ronin is still kissing his husband as he gathers him closer, drawing him up and into his lap so he can shift to try and get out of the bed. "Coffee?" he asks, giving Remi's ass a very generous fondle at the same time.

"Mm... no, things are alright now," he says, drawing back for one last, chaste kiss. "I'm still furious and I kind of want to pull his spine out through his mouth, but... that's my problem. He's taking care of his daughter - Kamaria, she's called. I invited them to visit Stormbreak come Longheat."

THE DARK STAR

and continue fighting

walked out this morning and i wrote down this song.
i just can't remember who to send it to

"Does this mean that we are allowed to...?" Remi's fingertips flutter down Ronin's spine, and despite the fact that they're both well and truly spent, there is something overtly suggestive in the patterns he marks on the Star's skin. "..anytime we want?"

Humming adoringly into the kiss, savouring the softness of Ronin's lips compared to the prickle of day-old scruff, Remi finds himself manhandled into a sitting position. Ronin is very likely the only man capable of moving Remi about so, and it has the alchemist's stomach fluttering wildly. 'Coffee.' Remi confirms with one last gentle kiss, before he menacingly grabs at Ronin's lower lip with his teeth.

With a nod that in no way seems appropriately pared with this description of violence, Remi shrugs and ruffles a hand lazily through his curls. "Well, if anyone could deal with losing a bit of spine, it's Sunjata." That, was supposed to be a tall joke. Shaking his head at the thought of the Flood coming to Stormbreak, Remi can only sigh as he reaches out a leg to try and drag their discarded sweatpants to where they might reach them. "Maybe Nate will show up at the gates and we can all hash things out once and for all." There would be little talking should the four of them find themselves in the same room though, of that Remi was sure. "I hate how much this all feels like it is playing into the gods hands though, you know?'

we shall heal our wounds, collect our dead

"Anytime we want," he whispers with a grin, surrendering his bottom lip to his husband's beastly advances and locking his arms more firmly around Remi as if to make sure he can't go anywhere, even as he tries to hook their sweatpants. "Leave 'em," he mumbles, his mouth still very occupied by the Lullaby as he rises to his feet. Given the nature of the past... however long it has been, Ronin doesn't feel particularly taxed, and yet his legs still want to play at being jelly as he adjusts Remi in his arms.

Leaving the alchemist to lock his legs around his waist, he walks them out of the bedroom and towards the kitchen without a thought to open curtains or windows or what time of day it might be. "If Nate shows up at the gate then we won't have to do anything. I'm quite certain that the Order and the Dragoons will have him in a small pile of dust before he gets further than a couple of steps," he mutters, equally as certain about the turbulence that would thread through their next meeting.

Scoffing, the Star presses a kiss against his husband's jaw. "No god talk, please," he mumbles. "It's not that I don't think it's important, but... right now isn't about them. Not any of them. It's about you and me."

THE DARK STAR

and continue fighting