human wreckage
Aurelia Murlow
the Fireheart


Age: 25 | Height: 5'7" | Race: Abandoned | Nationality: Outlander | Citizenship: Torchline
Level: 4 - Strg: 18 - Dext: 20 - Endr: 27 - Luck: 21 - Int:
Played by: Catalysta Offline
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Posts: 1,182 | Total: 1,720
MP: 630
#15
but the thing is, even if i could go back, i wouldn't belong there anymore
The question of what she had to give up is overwhelming to her achingly numb mind. But for a moment, she draws a blank. "I ... I don't know, it just.. everything changed so fast. I felt less freedom than before. Like everything I did and said mattered, reflected on Torchline, became a political move that might start or hold back the war." She swallows, trying to explain better, "S-someone.. came to me asking for my help. An Ascended. I was afraid that if I helped her, it would come back to haunt me in one way or another. I don't want her to be my enemy but, with what's coming... I don't know if we get the luxury of that choice. Any of us." And Aurelia didn't want to be the one that aided the wrong side... but she knows, deep down, she knows in her heart that she's the one on the wrong side of all this.

She flinches and sucks in a sharp breath as Mildew closes in on the worst parts of the wound, feeling her muscles shake from the pain and fatigue. For several moments, it's blinding, but she pulls through it if only because she has no choice but to.

Catching her breath as the pain ebbs, she listens to Mildew's words as best she can. There's a furrow in her brow, partially from her face being contorted by her physical struggles, partly for those that are more concerned with matters of the heart and mind. When Mildew gives her no straight opinion on what she'd done, she's not sure what to make of it. Perhaps, it is something better laid to rest...

A poor time, indeed. "I know I can't go back but-" she laughs woefully, tears springing to her eyes as she directs her gaze down at the witch's hand on her scar, "I wish-I really wish I could."

Aurelia's gaze flickers upward in surprise, only to lower once again. She's moved by it, the fact that Mildew wants to help protect her from harm. She sniffs back her tears, but doesn't bother with trying to wipe them away. Instead, she reaches for the woman's hand and rests her palm over it. "If she does want to come for me still, after all this time, I am sure that she would destroy me. But I.. I believe that she has her sights set on bigger fish. She stole the throne of Halo briefly, until Morgan fought for it back."

She sighs wearily, "Before I was brought to Caido, I hunted mages for a living. I hated them, their magic. It killed my father... Now that I'm one of them, I know exactly just how this kind of power can corrupt one's mind. Even the strong-minded. But I also know that there is nothing anyone can do to escape something so powerful. I wouldn't even know where to start, as far as protection goes." She shakes her head. "There are so many enemies I might one day face, Hotaru is... only one of them."
Aurelia
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Swamp Witch

Age: 512 | Height: 5'2" | Race: Demi-god | Nationality: Natural | Citizenship: Nomadic
Level: 2 - Strg: 17 - Dext: 15 - Endr: 17 - Luck: 11 - Int:
Played by: lancydulac Offline
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Posts: 151 | Total: 8,116
MP: 509
#16
Rusalka, Rusalka your arms out of water
Your hair like an alien bloom
Mildew nodded along to Aurelia's recounting of her moral dilemma, understanding it well; she herself had mixed feelings about the Ascended. Their Goddess and mission, what had been done to their bodies...all of that disgusted her, yet she was naturally empathetic; if she saw an Ascended in need, it was likely she would be compelled to help, or at least be kind. "What help did she ask for? I think there's still some mercies we could extend." As if to exemplify this, she gently stroked Aurelia's leg with her thumb where she held it down, knowing that the rag was going to sting.

Putting the rag down, she was about to start on her next treatment when Aurelia's hand was over hers. Mildew was surprised for a moment, then smiled and turned her hand to squeeze the young girls.

"Bigger fish...heh. Well, do be careful. I don't want to pull you out of too many bogs." Gently taking her hand away, she sat back and considered the wound for a moment, then reached behind herself for a needle and thread from the shelf on her wall. "I will need to stitch this, just a little. I wish I had something to give you for the pain, but I wasn't prepared..." Wetting the end of the thread in her mouth, she began to thread the needle.

As for power, hunting, protection....Mildew began to slowly press in the edges of Aurelia's wound inward and hummed. "All you can do is all you can. Though really, someone as nice as you with so many enemies? You might be overestimating just how invested they are in killing you, dear. People forget easily."
Dark-eyed Rusalka, your brow tressed in flowers
Mildew
Base Code by Sky!
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Aurelia Murlow
the Fireheart


Age: 25 | Height: 5'7" | Race: Abandoned | Nationality: Outlander | Citizenship: Torchline
Level: 4 - Strg: 18 - Dext: 20 - Endr: 27 - Luck: 21 - Int:
Played by: Catalysta Offline
Change author:
Posts: 1,182 | Total: 1,720
MP: 630
#17
but the thing is, even if i could go back, i wouldn't belong there anymore
"I.. uhm, I agreed to meet with her. She asked for one of my shifts, to better teach her people how to fight against animals," she shifts uncomfortably, "I thought it was for the purpose of teaching Ascended how to fight against the Attuned, in preparation for the war. She told me I was wrong... and I still refused. I was suspicious, admittedly. Paranoid." Now, though? She regretted refusing Wessex.

Mildew's joke goes over her head at first. Her expression squishes with puzzlement. But, after she relaxes, she lets out a small, bright laugh. "No, I don't want that either." Her smile wanes for what comes next, eyeing the spool of thread that Mildew reaches for. She nods, understanding, and tries to stay relaxed so as not to make it worse on herself.

The pain is searing hot and cold all at once; the heat of her flesh and the cold of the needle pushing together and pulling apart was not a good feeling. But it doesn't take long for the sensation to numb. She manages to hold still enough that she won't impede Mildew's work. "What about the war?" She mutters, her phrasing short and strained, "that's all war is about- killing your enemy."
Aurelia
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Swamp Witch

Age: 512 | Height: 5'2" | Race: Demi-god | Nationality: Natural | Citizenship: Nomadic
Level: 2 - Strg: 17 - Dext: 15 - Endr: 17 - Luck: 11 - Int:
Played by: lancydulac Offline
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Posts: 151 | Total: 8,116
MP: 509
#18
Rusalka, Rusalka your arms out of water
Your hair like an alien bloom
At first Mildew was confused by Aurelia's story, until she recalled being told once that the Ascended could take the abilities of others. She wasn't sure how it worked, if it hurt - but she would not have given her powers away either. Humming softly, Mildew momentarily laid her hand over Aurelias. "Even without everything in the world, it can be hard to give away such an important part of yourself. Maybe you were right to trust your gut."

Aurelia took the pain of the needle remarkably; Mildew admired her strength and tried her best to make it a short-lived bravery, swiftly and neatly pulling the thread through with a speed that spoke of experience. Before long it was finished, the edges brought together with a row of neat diagonal stitches ending in a small knot. Eventually, when the wound had healed more, they'd need to be removed, but she hoped healers in Torchline could handle that.

"War is impersonal. I'm talking about people specifically after you." She paused to look up at Aurelia with a tilt of her head, seeing if she understood. "It's much easier to survive a war. Believe me, I've done it. A few times."
Dark-eyed Rusalka, your brow tressed in flowers
Mildew
Base Code by Sky!
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Aurelia Murlow
the Fireheart


Age: 25 | Height: 5'7" | Race: Abandoned | Nationality: Outlander | Citizenship: Torchline
Level: 4 - Strg: 18 - Dext: 20 - Endr: 27 - Luck: 21 - Int:
Played by: Catalysta Offline
Change author:
Posts: 1,182 | Total: 1,720
MP: 630
#19
but the thing is, even if i could go back, i wouldn't belong there anymore
Her chin tilts in a thoughtful manner as she considers Mildew's perspective, trying to decide if it matches her own feelings. The only time she had ever been bitten by an Ascended was Nate, because it was how he learned about his patients' ailments. Back then, she had been desperate for an answer to what was wrong with her. Why this, why that, why me? But she'd never let an Ascended bite her for the sole purpose of using her own abilities. "It's not an easy thing, trusting someone else with your powers. If they used them to do some sort of harm..." she sighs, her breath pushing aside a greasy lock of hair, "I don't want to cause anymore damage than I already have, even indirectly. I was probably right to say no." However difficult that was.

Mildew's adept skills with the needle made short work of her aching cut, and before she knew it, it was over just as soon as it began. And when it ended, she let out heavy, trembling breaths of relief. Lifting a part of her tattered shirt, she uses it to wipe away the sweat that's dampened her forehead. "You're pretty good at that," she remarks once she's taken a good look at the stitching, "Won't leave a big, nasty scar, at least." She offers a small smile, a bit of light and energy returning to her eyes.

As for people who were after her personally, and the difference between that and war, Aurelia looks down again. "I really don't have that many enemies here... Just Hotaru, and I haven't seen or heard from her since everything happened. And I don't plan to. She doesn't fight very fair, and she's stronger than I am," she glances up at Mildew, "I couldn't see her when she attacked the Slagveld, not even when she attacked me directly. She was invisible, somehow. If I could have seen who she was from the beginning, I would've tried to talk her down." But whether or not it all would've ended up the same anyway, who could really say?
Aurelia
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Swamp Witch

Age: 512 | Height: 5'2" | Race: Demi-god | Nationality: Natural | Citizenship: Nomadic
Level: 2 - Strg: 17 - Dext: 15 - Endr: 17 - Luck: 11 - Int:
Played by: lancydulac Offline
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Posts: 151 | Total: 8,116
MP: 509
#20
Rusalka, Rusalka your arms out of water
Your hair like an alien bloom
"Mm. Though I suppose you wouldn't be to blame, really. Once they have the powers, it is their responsibility." Mildew wasn't entirely sure how it worked (she was under the impression Ascended kept the powers they took forever), but she knew that ultimately you were responsible for your own actions.

Going to put away her supplies, Mildew stood and admired her work, nodding in approval at the neat stitching and covered wound. It would hurt and there would always be some kind of scar, but Aurelia was right - it wouldn't be as bad as it could have been. Mostly importantly, she was likely to live. "Be sure to rest as much as you can. You can stay here until you are well enough to walk home." A few days, at the least; Mildew had not had a house guest for that long for many years, but she could hardly kick the girl out into the mud. "I may put you to work sewing or carving, though."

As for Hotaru...Mildew hummed and lifted her medical supplies up to put them away on a high shelf. "Sounds best to avoid her for the moment, to be sure. This Hotaru is an Ascended?"
Dark-eyed Rusalka, your brow tressed in flowers
Mildew
Base Code by Sky!
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Aurelia Murlow
the Fireheart


Age: 25 | Height: 5'7" | Race: Abandoned | Nationality: Outlander | Citizenship: Torchline
Level: 4 - Strg: 18 - Dext: 20 - Endr: 27 - Luck: 21 - Int:
Played by: Catalysta Offline
Change author:
Posts: 1,182 | Total: 1,720
MP: 630
#21
but the thing is, even if i could go back, i wouldn't belong there anymore
Regardless of the in's and out's of how Ascended bites work, "You do have a point." It wouldn't necessarily be her fault, so long as she didn't know what it would be used for. But if she did? Then, yes, she could potentially be to blame. So maybe it's better not to ask questions, if she ever were to submit herself to it. {Not that she thinks she will.} Plausible deniability and all that. But she keeps these thoughts to herself, letting the topic fade.

Scars were nothing to Aurelia, especially not one so small and in an insignificant area. She still doesn't even remember how she got the wound to begin with. A fall, she thinks, but her memory fogs when she tries to access it. Her gaze lifts with gentle surprise at Mildew's offering of a place to stay, and she smiles with amusement. "Thank you. You're very generous. I'd be happy to help you with whatever I can to repay you, though I don't think there's much I can do to repay the wisdom and insight you've given me. Or the fact that you probably saved my life today," but perhaps one day the favor could be returned, "If you ever need anything after we part ways, just let me know."

"Abandoned, like me," Aurelia corrects the mistake gently, "not all enemies are the most obvious, I guess. Even now..." She didn't feel like expanding on the point much more than that, feeling that at this point it's a given that everything has become about the war.

"I did want to tell you.." she shifts in her seat to let her leg relax now that Mildew is done tending to it, smiling softly, "I followed your advice and went to Safrin. She attuned me, after I completed a quest for her. And she gave me a shield. Even made me governor of Torchline after Sunjata left. But..." her lips tilt downward and she leans her head back against the wall, "I fear I've let her down now. I don't know how I can show my face to her again. Or even show my face in Torchline." Not that her plan is stay out here forever, carving and sewing for a swamp witch. It sounded nice, peaceful, but she knew she had to go back.
Aurelia
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Swamp Witch

Age: 512 | Height: 5'2" | Race: Demi-god | Nationality: Natural | Citizenship: Nomadic
Level: 2 - Strg: 17 - Dext: 15 - Endr: 17 - Luck: 11 - Int:
Played by: lancydulac Offline
Change author:
Posts: 151 | Total: 8,116
MP: 509
#22
Rusalka, Rusalka your arms out of water
Your hair like an alien bloom
"Oh dear, I'm a Demi-Goddess. Saving lives and changing them is just my day to day." Mildew said with a wink, waving her hand and going to look for something to occupy Aurelia's mind. Really, any sewing or carving she needed doing was already done, but her guest didn't need to know that. Kneeling in the corner to go through a basket of clothes, she subtly ripped the arm seam of a dress behind her leg.

Nodding as Aurelia reflected on her enemies, she stood. "Do you know anything about darning? Perhaps you could fix this." Mildew held out the dress so the hole could be seen, then laid it over Aurelia's legs as she tried to find a needle and thread (that hadn't just been used to sew up a wound).

"I'm glad you went to see her. Now, I know she has a reputation for being somewhat...sensitive, but Safrin is forgiving to those that really wish to have a relationship with her. If you explain the situation and accept whatever next duty she gives, I'm sure you'll be fine." Finally having found it, Mildew pressed a sewing kit into Aurelia's hands. "Now, start sewing."
Dark-eyed Rusalka, your brow tressed in flowers
Mildew
Base Code by Sky!
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