From being an Abandoned who had rarely left the Hollowed Grounds, to embracing the call of adventure, to dying and being reborn first as an Ascended and then as an Ancient, Maea has gone through quite the amount of changes in her life. One thing remains common, though, in her attempts to find out just where she belongs; she’s always had a craving for knowledge which has brought her to so many places and to meet so many people here in Caido. We can’t wait to see what else is in store for her!
Congratulations, Maea!
Credits
Court of the Fallen was created in October of 2018 by Odd, Honey, and Crooked.
Skinning and hosting by the epically talented Kaons, and functionality fanciness by the coding magic of Neowulf. If you ever see either of them around, make sure to show them some love!
The water is a little too cold for Jude’s preference so swimming is off the agenda in the ocean, but the Pool has shallower pockets that are more easily warmed by Torchline’s intense sun, providing a perfect opportunity for Jude to wade and practice his swimming. Aidon circles high overhead to babysit him, but Jude doesn’t truly mind; swimming is a skill taught very young to Torchline children, but even the shallow pools can be dangerous. It’s fun enough to be alone.
Well, sort of. He’d left a secret note for his older brother (very “secretly” stashed half-covered by the teenagers pillow) requesting his presence here, but since it has been a few days since Jude last saw him anyway, his hopes aren’t very high.
Luckily Jude has hope and optimism in spades, so as he waits Jude practices his jumps from the adjacent rocks, giggling quietly to himself all the while.
Edmund had returned to Torchline briefly. Just to take his things and go. It was as he was leaving a note for his family that he saw Jude's. Running a tongue over his fangs, the Ancient contemplated just what to do. He loved his little brother, ruly. But how could he face him? The blood had only just been washed off his hands and clothes.
The thought made him recall the last few hours. When the bloodlust had faded, the young Ancient had been physically sick with himself. He had thought he'd stick with hunting animals. But the initial bloodlust and lack of animals in the general vicinity had been against him. He'd killed a man. Killed him. Eaten his heart and sacrificed him in fire. It was monstrous, horrific, and cruel. And at the time, Edmund had loved it. He'd reveled in it.
Yet there was no turning back, and sill he didn't regret the power he'd gained by going to Dygra. But he'd still be seeing Milo's face in his nightmares and mind's eye for years to come. For now, all he could do was shove the emotions and memories down. He'd deal with it later. Maybe.
Letting out a sigh, Edmund made up his mind. He left his note on the table and went to find Jude. Upon arriving, he couldn't help the small smile that came to his lips. Jude was just adorable. Thinking quickly, Edmund hid behind a nearby collection of trees. Once he was obscured, he called out.
"Jude? I need to you stay there, ok? I need you to promise me something first, before you come here." Hopefully his little brother would listen to the urgency in his voice and comply.
Many things happen in quick succession in Jude’s chest as Edmund speaks. Excitement, because he recognizes his brother’s voice; trepidation, because of the urgent tone; wary curiosity as the request sinks in. Standing slowly and shivering just a little from the lazy wind on his wet skin, Jude turns towards his brother’s voice and holds tightly to his trust in the older boy to fend off any fear.
“O-Okay, Mun. Is something wrong?” he ventured on a tremulous tone, only to bite his tongue right after. Surely Edmund would have told him if something was wrong or if they were in danger. “What do I promise?” He hadn’t forgotten that part and he’s proud of it. Whatever his big brother asks, Jude is certain it will be something he will be willing to promise.
The fear in Jude's voice makes Edmund's heart twinge. "Nothing's wrong." He tries to reassure his brother, but his voice stays tinted with his own nerves. The Ancient takes a deep breath. "I need you to promise me that if asked if you've seen me, you'll say no. That you'll say the last time you saw me was the family dinner a few days ago. And I especially need you to promise not to tell anyone, anyone of what I look like now or anything we talk about in this conversation. Please, Jude. It's for my own safety." He wasn't powerful enough yet to defend himself. Or to protect Torchline. Not yet.
Twiddling the frays on his shirt, Edmund continued. "Please little brother, I promise you I'll come home once things settle down but right now, I need everyone to think that I've vanished without telling anyone anything. Apart from a note I left on the kitchen table that is." His voice turned pleading, "So please Jude, promise me." Edmund wanted to hug his baby brother, to have at least one goodbye.
“Nothing’s wrong.” Those words alone are enough to comfort Jude, and he exhales slowly, releasing any worry or fear alongside it. If Edmund says things are okay, then they simply are.
Except then things get really, really complicated.
There are so many things to remember, so many questions that spark onto his tongue as Edmund continues to talk, each one battering at his firmly clenched teeth to try and break free. Why does it matter what Edmund looks like? Why would he claim it was for his own safety if everything was okay?
And then the worst - why is he leaving?
The tears are already sharp at the back of Jude’s eyes at the mere implication. He’s never had to lie before either and certainly never to family. He bites his lip, worrying it between his teeth even as he slowly climbs out of the pool, the quiet dripping of water onto rock in time with the too-fast beating of his heart. Can he lie to his parents for Edmund? Can he even succeed if he tries? Jude doesn’t know, and it’s a terrifying idea, but Edmund would never ask it of him if it wasn’t important. Wouldn’t leave if it wasn’t important. So what else can Jude do but agree?
“I promise, Mun. I won’t tell anyone I saw you, or what you look like.” Wandering tentatively closer to the treeline, Jude scans fruitlessly for his big brother. “Did you…get bigger again?” It’s the only change he knows, but why would Edmund hide it?
12-02-2022, 06:53 PM (This post was last modified: 12-02-2022, 06:55 PM by Edmund.)
Edmund's heart cracked when tears began to fall down his baby brother's face. "Jude. Thank you. And I just want you to know that even if you break your promise, I'll never hate you. I'll always love you." The Ancient was well aware that his request was going against his little brother's very nature. He would never, ever, fault him for that should Jude fail. He hoped that time wouldn't come, but he needed Jude to know that fact.
As Jude approached Edmund took a hesitant step back. "Please don't be afraid. Please. I'd never hurt you." With that small warning given in a shaking, pleading voice, the Ancient finally stepped forward and into Jude's line of sight. Taking a knee, he held out his arms for his brother, asking for a hug. "I promise."
There was no denying what Edmund had become. The obsidian horns upon his head, the spade tipped tail that curled beside him on the earth, fangs peeking out, and the new feral tint in his eyes. He was an Ancient, a son of Dygra. And if Jude rejected him, Edmund's heart would shatter irreparably.
Jude sniffles a little, feeling ashamed of his tears. He may be devastated that Edmund is clearly leaving them all, but he should be strong and not show it, not make his big brother feel any kind of guilt for his choice. But he isn’t strong enough, and even Edmund’s comforting words that reassure him of his love aren’t enough to stem the flow entirely. Though they slow enough to provide Jude enough vision to make it to the tree line, his lip wobbles traitorously anyway. It impacts his speech, making the words warble as he says, “I’ll always love you too, Mun. I promise.”
Which is why he finds it so silly that his brother asks him not to be afraid. Afraid of what? Of course Edmund would never hurt him! He’d never do much as practiced his fire in the same room as Jude out of an abundance of caution, had always kissed every scrape and bandaged every cut. Jude could never be afraid of Edmund. Never.
That certainty carries Jude through the maelstrom of emotions that suddenly sweep through his chest as Edmund emerges, a familiar stranger, warped and changed in ways Jude could never have anticipated.
There is a brief, prolonged breath where Jude hesitates - not out of fear, but uncertainty, wondering if these changes hurt, if he can even hug Edmund the same way anymore. But his brother is taking a knee and opening his arms, and hesitation doesn’t matter anymore. Jude runs to Edmund’s arms and throws himself into them trustingly. “You look like Sunjata does sometimes, that’s all,” he tries to comfort, wondering if Edmund was worried about his appearance. Horns and tails are common for half-shifted Attuned anyway. “You’re not scary, you’re still my brother.” And to emphasize that he squeezes tighter around Edmund’s shoulders, fearless only because of the love in his heart.
A tear rolled down Edmund's cheek, his love and guilt overwhelming in their intensity. The brief moments where Jude hesitates to move forward stabs deep and the Ancient has to restrain a whine, certain that his heart is about to be shattered. Yet his little brother proves him wrong and soothes every ache in a heartbeat as Jude throws his arms around the teen.
He holds Jude as tightly as he dares, rubbing his cheek against the child's temple as he lets out a purr. The molten tiger that now lived beneath his skin fully intended to take advantage of the moment to smother Jude in their protective scent. "I love you, Jude." Edmund repeats in response to the Accepted's reassurances, pulling him tighter. "You're the best brother anyone could ever have." He was so damn lucky to be the one who got to claim that title.
Reluctantly, Edmund pulled back slightly so they could continue the conversation, still keeping his arms around Jude. "I don't plan to be gone for too long. I just need to learn how to hide my horns and tail first before I come home. I..uh..." He bit his lip nervously, a fang poking out. "I've become what's called an Ancient of the Goddess Dygra, who lives in the Climb. I want to be able to explain all of this to mum and Harper first before showing them."
Edmund chuckled "I think suddenly showing up with these." He gently tapped his horns against Jude's shoulder before adding. "Might make them freak out too much to let me explain."
The purr is only further proof to Jude that his brother is more like an Attuned than whatever monster he clearly believes himself to appear as to his younger brother. "I love you more," he repeats back, as he always has and always will. Though he does giggle a little, endeared and flustered by such a compliment from his brother. He is far too humble to consider himself the best at anything, but it's an honor above all others to be considered the best brother.
As Edmund pulls slightly away Jude does the same, idly pushing some of his curls away from his forehead where they plaster, still damp from his tidepool adventures. Clearly he has to focus, and the gravity of Edmund's voice makes him bite the inside of his cheek to force himself to do so. There is a Goddess he has never heard of in all his classes or stories from their parents, a need for Edmund to conceal his appendages for some reason...it's a hard pill to swallow, mostly because he doesn't agree, but Edmund is older and wiser. He has to trust his brother.
"You're gonna come back though, right?" Unintentionally it comes out plaintive and uncertain, because the rest doesn't matter nearly as much as Edmund coming home at the end of his journey, no matter how long it takes. It's the only question he cares to ask, because to Jude, the answer to this one query is all that matters. Fealty to a new Goddess, becoming a new race...who cares about all that? That happens nearly every day.
Edmund shook his head with a wet laugh, "Not possible." Gods he loved his brother. He was going to miss Jude horribly. Even though his motives were based on emotion more than logic, the young Ancient still felt that him leaving was necessary. Maybe hiding his becoming an Ancient wasn't the best choice. But waiting till he had a better handle on his new powers and tendencies was.
Regardless, the end result was the same so the Ancient nodded firmly. "I'll come home as soon as I can. I promise." Edmund grinned at Jude before kissing the child's forehead. "Alright? It'll be ok. I'll try to be back by Flowerbirth."
His laughter means Jude is doing something right. He can't take this weight off his brother's shoulders, no matter how badly he wants to. If Jude could make it all okay with a snap of his fingers he would, but if Edmund insists he must go, Jude will keep his secret and give him the time he needs away from their family.
There seems to be a goodbye approaching, and Jude knows he should have anticipated it considering the entire conversation leading up to it, but it feels like there is a cavernous hole in his chest regardless. He isn't ready. Didn't even know he should have been preparing to be ready all this time. Such a promise is weak, vague, with no real timeline and a lot of 'try', but to Jude it's a vow made in stone. "I'm gonna miss you," his voice warbles plaintively, and he feels bad for it, because he doesn't want to make Edmund feel worse. But he wants to send his brother off with the knowledge of it, to remind him there would be someone waiting at the door when he finally came back home. "Be careful," he urges, in a mimic of their parents' voices that always cry behind their backs when the two of them would go stumbling out into the yard, ready for some adventure or another. "And...and maybe write to me, if you can?" If it wouldn't jeopardize his secret, of course.
Edmund isn't ready either, but he's convinced that this is the right choice. He needs to relearn himself, and his new abilities. Milo's face flashes in his mind once more and he barely restrains a whimper. Yes, he needs to learn more about his new existence before trusting himself with his family.
[say{\"I\'ll miss you too. And I\'ll try to send you letters when I can.\"[/say} Giving his brother one last kiss on the forehead, Edmund steps back. "I'll be careful. I love you." And with that, the new Ancient reluctantly leaves. It'll be months before he sees his baby brother again.
