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+---- Thread: how could I freeze when you're hotter than hell? (/showthread.php?tid=11323)
how could I freeze when you're hotter than hell? - Remi - 05-13-2025
The Wildwood is thick with LongHeat, the air heavy with warmth, all green hush and golden light filtering through the canopy. Distant birdsong weaves through the branches, and insects hum lazily through the underbrush. Remi moves easily along the worn trail, sandals scuffing against roots and old moss, his shirt loose and half-unbuttoned, sleeves rolled up past his elbows. A woven satchel bounces gently against his hip with each step, and a mischievous sort of smile tugs at the corners of his mouth.
[say]"You know,"[/say] he calls over his shoulder to where Ronin walks just behind him, [say]"We could have flown, but then you would have missed me tripping over that last root, and I know how much joy you get from watching me suffer in very small, very inconvenient ways."[/say]
The trail bends, and Remi tugs a low-hanging branch aside with one hand, pausing only to grin at his husband before pushing forward again. [say]"I thought we could grab a few pieces of the old cottage. You know—make a picture frame or something for Flora. A bit of home she can hang up on her glorified raft."[/say]
There’s no trace of guilt in the words, though the glint in his sea-glass eyes is just a little too innocent.
The path opens at last into a familiar clearing—overgrown now, but unmistakable. The ruins of the little cottage sit nestled beneath the boughs like a memory half-sketched back into being, its bones still intact, if softened by moss and time.
RE: how could I freeze when you're hotter than hell? - Ronin - 05-13-2025
[say]"I didn't laugh for that long,"[/say] Ronin protests, his voice a little distant, but that's because he's turned to stroll backwards behind Remi for a few paces. His dark hair is swept out of his face, and any shirt with sleeves has been abandoned for a tank top that still provides little relief against the humidity of the Greatwood at the height of Longheat. Turning to face front once more, he offers Remi a fiendish little smile. [say]"Not like when that beehive almost landed on your head."[/say]
At that he'd been inconsolable for a good few minutes, and even the memory of it now has a chuckle wanting to hiccup in the back of his throat. [say]"Oh I see,"[/say] he echoes, taking over in holding the branch out of their way to avoid being unceremoniously thwacked by it. [say]"We came pretty much the entire length of Caido for a picture frame. That definitely sounds like the sort of thing you enjoy doing."[/say]
That's code for I don't fucking believe you, Remi Taliesin, but fine, as the Bastion will well know.
Luckily, Ronin is dutifully silenced as the overgrown little space comes upon them, the Knight falling to a halt and tucking his hands into the pockets of his pants as he drinks in the skeleton of the place. [say]"To think this used to be right next to the water,"[/say] he says softly. [say]"I think that's where we used to tether the houseboat."[/say]
RE: how could I freeze when you're hotter than hell? - Remi - 05-13-2025
Remi shoots Ronin a look over his shoulder that’s pure deadpan innocence, his curls already beginning to stick to his forehead from the humidity. [say]"Mmhmm. You didn’t laugh for long, just long enough I thought you might choke."[/say] His voice is wry, but fond, like every part of this conversation is a well-worn page in a book he still enjoys reading.
He ducks beneath a low-hanging branch and waits for Ronin to do the same before letting it spring harmlessly back into place. [say]"And for the record, I still think the beehive was targeting you for mentioning the word honey."[/say]
The humour fades into something softer as they step into the clearing, the weight of old memories pressing gentle palms to his shoulders. Remi slows, his steps quieter, more deliberate, as he gazes out at what remains of where their little houseboat once was moored.
Then, as if remembering himself, he straightens and flashes Ronin a grin. [say]"Listen, with all Flora has gone through, I thought a little reminder of where she started, before she’s off chasing sea monsters and smugglers."[/say] His voice stays light, easy. A little too casual, maybe, but not suspicious.
As for the changes in the Greatwood's landscape, the Bastion can only sigh and nod as he picks a path forward, hoping for the sake of his quest that at least some part of what would eventually become the Tramezzino would have lingered.
RE: how could I freeze when you're hotter than hell? - Ronin - 05-13-2025
[say]"I only mentioned honey as a pet name for you,"[/say] Ronin protests, his response quick and almost practiced, such are the number of times they've had this discussion. [say]"And I know you would never let me choke. Not on something as innocuous as air,"[/say] he adds, his smile unashamedly crooked. The urge to reach out and pat Remi on the butt is only stayed by the sudden nostalgia in the air, and instead the Knight draws up beside his husband, gazing fondly around at the clearing.
[say]"Mmmm,"[/say] he says, pointedly, before apparently resigning himself to letting today be about Flora and a souvenir collected from a place she'd never actually been allowed to visit, if memory serves him correctly about his unreasonable behaviour. [say]"Hopefully more sea monsters than smugglers, these days,"[/say] he agrees, picking his way through the overgrown path and smiling as he rests a hand on a post he might have once tethered a rope against, grooves in the wood from frequent use.
[say]"Do you think the snow dick we made here still comes back every year?"[/say] he asks suddenly, grinning.
RE: how could I freeze when you're hotter than hell? - Remi - 05-13-2025
Remi rolls his eyes with a long-suffering fondness, casting Ronin a sideways glance that’s ruined only slightly by the twitch of a grin tugging at the corner of his mouth. [say]"Mmhmm,"[/say] he hums, the sound rich with amusement. Then, more quietly and with a raised brow that speaks volumes, he adds, [say]"You are quite right that there are things I’d let you choke on."[/say]
Kicking gently through a patch of overgrown moss, Remi squints toward a half-submerged plank of wood and lets his expression soften. [say]"She looked like she had fun, didn’t she?"[/say] Remi wonders, of Flora when they'd last seen her. His voice slips into something quieter at the end, words like petals crushed under thumb as he crouches to inspect a half-rotted length of wood. He runs his fingers over it thoughtfully, brushing off dirt and time.
And then—
He snorts. The sound is boyish and bright as he glances up at Ronin. [say]"Gods, I hope so. That on the first snow of DeepFrost, dozens of very earnest woodland creatures are forced to flee because of the sudden erection of dozens of snowdicks between here and the Grounds."[/say] Straightening, he wipes his hand absently on his shorts and grins.
RE: how could I freeze when you're hotter than hell? - Ronin - 05-13-2025
[say]"If you hadn't made that innuendo, I'd have demanded we get a divorce,"[/say] Ronin says with a filthy grin, watching as his husband adventures off into the nearby undergrowth in search of some remnant or another of their houseboat when it had been here in the Greatwood. For his part, he kicks about the docking post and raises his eyebrows at a rope, half buried, snaking away into the forest. [say]"Shut up, no way,"[/say] he chimes, grinning. [say]"You know, I think this might be our anchor at the end of this."[/say] With a bark of laughter, Ronin crouches down to dig his fingers into the soft earth and yank up the rope.
[say]"I remember cutting it loose before I flew the boat up to the Cordillera,"[/say] he continues, wrapping the length of it around his hand a couple of times, heedless of the moss and dirt, and straightening up. [say]"I don't know what made me think it'd... float away, or something. It's an anchor for a reason."[/say]
Steadying his feet in the earth, the muscles in Ronin's biceps and forearms are suddenly reminded of good, hard work as he gives the rope a yank. [say]"She looked like she was having a blast,"[/say] he agrees, half through gritted teeth. [say]"Though her friendship circle has gotten... wild, wouldn't you say?"[/say] Sloppy, he might have opted for as well.
RE: how could I freeze when you're hotter than hell? - Remi - 05-13-2025
Remi flashes a devilish grin over his shoulder. [say]"Well then,"[/say] he says, voice rich with mock gravity, [say]"it seems our marriage has been spared for another day."[/say] The forest hums quietly around them, leaves whispering as he pauses in his rummaging to squint at what Ronin is wrestling from the earth.
As the rope emerges—mossy, stained, and unmistakably familiar—Remi laughs low in his throat, the sound as fond as it is amused. [say]"Mmm, you say that, but it could just as easily have ended up on Ianto's wagon as remaining here."[/say] He shakes his head, curls bouncing, before nodding toward it. [say]"We should take it. We can put it on the Northaven."[/say] That said, his foot nudges aside a flattened patch of bramble, revealing a pale scrap of driftwood that still bears the rusted ghosts of nail holes. Remi slips it into his pocket without fanfare—something for Mort’s quest, tucked away like a secret smile.
His gaze finds Ronin again, and there’s no hiding the appreciative sweep of his eyes as the Knight braces and hauls against the rope. [say]"Mmh. You know, for a man who is impossibly strong, you really do put your back into it,"[/say] he murmurs, teasing and affectionate as ever.
Then, with a wry snort, Remi nods. [say]"Looked like the same crew that started the food fight at your BBQ, too. If nothing else, they’ve got...energy?"[/say] He scratches at his chin, brow furrowing. [say]"Think you should sit them down? Give them one of your stern talks, like you did with Koa back in the day?"[/say]
A beat passes before he adds, lips twitching, [say]"I also...don't remember our friend group being quite so...interconnected. Or maybe I’m misremembering because of the way I used to be."[/say] Loren aside, Remi didn't think so though. There certainly wasn't the same level of sharing that seemed to be going on nowadays.
RE: how could I freeze when you're hotter than hell? - Ronin - 05-13-2025
[say]"Can you imagine Ianto's wagon trundling around the Greatwood with this thing weighing it down?"[/say] Ronin laughs, having to put every ounce of his demigodly strength into hauling the overgrown anchor through the undergrowth. It eventually emerges, though, leaving the Knight panting but victorious as he slumps to half sit on the docking pole, wiping sweat from his forehead. [say]"If you want to heft it the fuck home, you can be my guest. I was just thinking maybe there was something on it that we could take for Flora."[/say]
Alas, though, it's just the anchor, though Ronin looks down at it very fondly as if it's a reminder of their entire chapter in the forest together. Only at the compliment - and the way he can practically feel Remi's eyes on him - does he glance up, blowing a kiss to his husband for his trouble. [say]"Just feel lucky I didn't put my back out doing it."[/say] He laughs.
Energy translates to they'd find trouble without looking for it, something Ronin both groans internally at and also remembers very well. [say]"Maybe I can save my breath and just give Koa a reminder with a stern look,"[/say] he suggests with a smirk. [say]"Then he can pass the message along."[/say]
At Remi's confusion regarding the interconnection of Flora's friend group compared to their own, though, the Knight can't help but let out a laugh that's very near a cackle. [say]"Remi,"[/say] he scolds, before holding up his hand to count off on his fingers. [say]"Isla. Amalia. Ianto, however often he dipped in and out of our lives. You didn't get a chance with Rexanna but we both knew you wanted to. And you had that really close call with Sunjata that one time, rememeber?"[/say]
RE: how could I freeze when you're hotter than hell? - Remi - 05-13-2025
Remi snorts, a crooked grin tugging at his mouth as he watches Ronin. [say]"Please. Ianto’s wagon held things far heavier than an anchor and managed just fine,"[/say] he drawls, the travelling tongue wrapping warm and lyrical around the tease. [say]"You’re just lazy."[/say] The accusation is soft, affectionate, thoroughly unrepentant. He twirls his fingers toward the anchor as if to say that Ronin could collect whatever part of it he wanted.
Of course, the moment Ronin starts blowing kisses, Remi’s grin softens. [say]"Mmh. Well if anything at all has gotten tense as a result of coming up north to help me with this,"[/say] he murmurs, all innocence except for the sparkle in his eyes. [say]"I would be more than happy to rub it better for you."[/say] He waves a hand vaguely, like he’s a particularly generous (and skilled) healer.
As for the Koa and kid problem, the Bastion just nods approvingly. [say]"Good. Nothing like one of your infamous glares to bring them all to their senses."[/say]
But when the Knight starts ticking off names, Remi freezes mid-step. [say]"Really?"[/say] he huffs, throwing Ronin a scandalized look. [say]"Aside from Loren, we've never slept with the same person. We didn’t date in the same families. We didn’t have friends who’d all—"[/say] He waves a hand in a vague and entirely suggestive gesture. [say]"—hooked up with each other like it was a game of who’s-next?"[/say] Which he certainly didn't know to be true, but given what he'd witnessed at the Hanged Man, he didn't think he was too far off.
As for the one time with Sunjata, Remi’s hand flies to his heart. [say]"That was not a close call!"[/say] he protests. [say]"We were both out of our minds, and I was just trying to keep him from drowning!"[/say] Sure they'd been on the beach at the time, but what did that matter?
With a muttered [say]"Honestly,"[/say] he crouches to pick at a patch of moss, only to glance sideways at Ronin, expression mischievous. [say]"Although if you’re keeping score, you had sex with Amalia, so if there's any entanglement at all, it was absolutely your doing."[/say]
RE: how could I freeze when you're hotter than hell? - Ronin - 05-13-2025
[say]"Heavier than an anchor?"[/say] Ronin drawls right back, disbelieving and folding his arms across his chest. [say]"Like what? You?"[/say] Clearly even talking about the antics of the kid gang has both men becoming more juvenile by the second, because the Knight raises his eyebrows in challenge as if inviting Remi to a game of hard knocks. Especially when he calls him lazy, causing Ronin's mouth to fall open. [say]"I'm gonna throw this thing at you,"[/say] he informs him; despite that, he's already prowling off the post as if intent on getting some form of physical revenge on his husband.
[say]"You can rub me better after I give you one of my infamous glares to have for your very own,"[/say] he tells him, trying to swipe for Remi as if to hook an arm around his waist to wrestle him across the clearing and back towards the anchor. Whether or not he's successful, he's still got to pause for a beat to contain his laughter at the Bastion's description (complete with hand gestures) of the circle jerk of Flora's friend group.
[say]"I've never seen anyone save someone from drowning quite like that,"[/say] he informs him. And as for Amalia, Remi will only get as far as you had sex with Amalia before Ronin is trying to silence anything else he has to say with a loud, [say]"You said I coooooouuUUUULD."[/say] So there.
RE: how could I freeze when you're hotter than hell? - Remi - 05-13-2025
Remi throws up both hands with exaggerated exasperation, curls bouncing as he huffs, [say]"Yeah. It was a magical wagon. Bigger on the inside. Ianto kept at least three wardrobes, a cursed painting, and one very suspiciously heavy trunk in there. An anchor wouldn’t even crack the top five."[/say] Duh.
At the threat of being pelted with said anchor, Remi squints, one brow arching slowly in mock concern. [say]"Just try not to throw your back out, old man. Tighten your core first."[/say]
He lets himself be dragged into Ronin’s orbit with a theatrical grunt, but not without resisting just enough to make it a show. [say]"No one drowned that day, did they?"[/say] he fires back with the gleam of smug righteousness, even as he's wrestled bodily toward the anchor like a sack of moss. [say]"And for the record, I was unconscious, thank you very much!"[/say] That part is shouted over Ronin’s protest, Remi’s voice sailing cheerfully into the trees. [say]"Could have picked anyone, but nooooooooo had to be one of our oldest friends."[/say] Then, as if realizing how the pieces actually fit together, tries to straighten triumphantly.
[say]"WHO WAS DEIMOS' EX. IT IS YOU. YOU'RE THE TANGLER."[/SAY]
RE: how could I freeze when you're hotter than hell? - Ronin - 05-13-2025
[say]"Remi you don't even know how heavy an anchor is,"[/say] Ronin accuses. [say]"You're saying that Ianto's shack thing would be heavy enough to hold down our houseboat with us inside it?"[/say]
Assisting in putting on a show (for whom? he doesn't know) by tangling both of his arms around Remi, he - yes, engages his core - and bodily hauls the other man back towards his find. [say]"You're one to talk,"[/say] he sasses. [say]"I hear the orchestra of your knees when you bend down to get something. And the symphony you make trying to get out of bed in the morning."[/say]
One he adds to and harmonises with, yes, but that's beside the point.
[say]"And what were the odds of anyone ever drowning that day up on the dry, dry sand, Remi?"[/say] he wants to know. [say]"I think what you mean to say is thank you Ronin, for not letting me blow Sunjata like he was an inflatable raft."[/say]
Not knowing what, exactly, he'd ever planned to do once he got Remi to the anchor, luckily for him the Bastion finds a perfect distraction as he trills loudly into the forest. Gasping and letting his jaw drop theatrically, he smacks the other man on the ass as he releases him.
[say]"YOU KISSED ME WHEN YOU WERE DATING IANTO - AND YOU WERE BLIND,"[/say] he announces. Why that second part is important, he doesn't know.
RE: how could I freeze when you're hotter than hell? - Remi - 05-13-2025
[say]"Excuse me,"[/say] Remi gasps, utterly affronted, [say]"it is not a shack thing—it is a magical fucking wagon, Ronin. So yes, that’s exactly what I’m saying. It could anchor the whole continent if it wanted to."[/say] Could it? For the sake of winning this argument, absolutely it could.
He fake-flails in Ronin’s arms, limbs flopping dramatically as he’s wrestled backward, sand kicking up with each exaggerated step. [say]"At least I don’t groan like I’ve just climbed a mountain every time I get out of a chair!"[/say] he accuses (he does). [say]"Or constantly need to broadcast every single grey hair I find in the mirror!"[/say]
But then they're back to the fateful day on the beach and Remi squints up at his husband with full theatrical suspicion. [say]"Okay but how long were you watching before you decided to intervene, oh great lifeguard? Because I’m just saying, from the way you stormed in, it looked like someone wanted to join the party."[/say]
His words are punctuated by the smack to his backside, and Remi lets out a scandalized gasp that could wake the dead. He wheels on Ronin, curls bouncing and sea-glass eyes wide. [say]"You kissed me first!"[/say] he yells over the clearing, gesturing wildly like he’s trying to alert the entire Greatwood. [say]"And I felt really bad about cheating on Ianto, THANK YOU VERY MUCH!"[/say] For all he knew, the fox was listening in right then.
RE: how could I freeze when you're hotter than hell? - Ronin - 05-13-2025
[say]"Oh, could it now? Then it should have no problem... erm... I dunno. Dick jokes, probably."[/say] Listen, Ronin has long forgotten why they were arguing about Ianto's wagon and the anchor, and now that he's smacking Remi on the ass and they're arguing about who among them is THE TANGLER and also how old the other is, it feels quite unimportant.
[say]"Yeah, that's only because all your grey hairs are in your pubes. You can't lean down far enough to get a mirror to see,"[/say] he quips with a raise of his eyebrows and a gay sassy hand on his hip. [say]"And - and - you'd have no idea how long I was looking, because apparently you were so sick you thought you were both drowning!"[/say] So there.
Then, of course, Remi is ever-so-scandalised and yelling through the trees and Ronin can no longer remotely keep a straight face. Indeed, it's with a broad grin that he all but prowls towards his husband, blue eyes glittering with mischief. [say]"I did kiss you first,"[/say] he agrees readily. [say]"And I'm sorry to Ianto, but given the choice, I'd kiss you first again and again and again, if it meant that we ended up here."[/say]