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+---- Thread: Eye of a hurricane, listen to yourself churn (/showthread.php?tid=12413)
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Eye of a hurricane, listen to yourself churn - Koa - 01-18-2026
(set after the ME)
When the people disperse and the crowds fade, Koa seeks out the Risen Sun. His friend had, predictably, been surrounded by anxious people vying for his attention, but Koa is patient enough to wait for his opportunity - albeit with a tapping foot that belies the anxiety humming beneath his skin. It's impressive, honestly, watching the Commander navigate the storm, seeing how well Zavien is able to handle and soothe the frayed nerves of the people of Stormbreak.
He can't help but worry for how Zav is actually doing, beneath that calm veneer.
Though disheveled and scruffy from his recent trip, Koa nevertheless cuts a recognizable figure in Stormbreak, and he's still waiting when a group of Dragoons spot him, converging on his location with greetings and cries of relief. The young man speaks with them briefly, finding comfort and ease for his nerves in the familiar camaraderie of his pack. They disperse with an exchange of squeezed arms and plans to reconvene later in place, and then Koa turns back to see where Zavien has gone, whether the time has finally come to seek out his friend.
RE: Eye of a hurricane, listen to yourself churn - Zavien - 01-18-2026
One more set of eyes goes unnoticed. Everyone is watching him, taking their cues on how to process this, whether to panic or not, what direction to go. He can't fail now. He can't falter. His people are depending on him, and if he breaks now, the memories of Stormbreak's last days will be filled with fear and despair rather than calm sorrow. He can't relax or it might all fall apart - he might fall apart.
Pasting a sympathetic smile on his face, he reassures another couple of the plans in place, the contingencies and procedures being developed to ensure that everyone gets off in a timely manner - with as much of their life in tow as possible. Their lives aren't over, just shifting. New opportunities will arise, and they'll be able to grow without the shadows of past failures to diminish what they build. They can remember Stormbreak fondly and cherish the bonds they've formed in the safety of a new home.
They're words he's said a thousand time, sentiments he's offered along with a sliver of hope from his own stores. He believes every word and does what he can to encourage others to celebrate the city for it was rather than mourn what will become of it. But despite his motivation and desire to be a fountain of endless hope and support, each interaction depletes his reserves, and by the time the last couple is stepping away, clinging to each other, Zavien is left exhausted and hollow.
He waits until they've stepped out of sight, until he thinks there aren't any more eyes on him before letting his shoulders slip, his smile sinking into quiet sorrow. His eyes are unfocused as they stare after the Breakers, giving him a moment where his thoughts slow and drift, a gentle current of stress and unease turning to a silent emptiness that he embraces for a single breath where no one needs him, where no one is looking.
But there's always someone watching, and he feels the gaze in the dull sensation that follows overstimulation.
Turning slowly, he prepares to rally his strength once more - until his eyes land on a familiar face that makes his heart ache. [say]"Koa."[/say] Without thought or hesitation, he walks forward to pull his friend into a hug, gripping tight despite any dirt or grime that may threaten to come between them. It's a desperate hold full of unspoken words and emotions that can wait to be said. For now, he just appreciates having someone to hold, a shoulder to lean on for however brief the time.
RE: Eye of a hurricane, listen to yourself churn - Koa - 01-18-2026
He can see the moment Zavien turns to him, shoulders tense and back drawn straight as though bracing to take a blow. It makes Koa's breath catch to see his friend so entrenched in armor, and for a second he's worried that it's him Zav's steeling against, that his absence has been so unforgivable as to make the Commander bristle at the sight of him.
But then the moment passes as their eyes meet and Zavien crumples, and Koa feels stupid for his fears. In a few quick strides the men are together, Zavien clinging to Koa like he's a lifeboat, Koa holding his friend afloat with all the strength he has to give. [say]"Zav."[/say]
Then there's a brief silence as Koa breathes deeply, mouth suddenly dry, words abruptly failing, because what is he supposed to say? [say]"Great speech, Commander,"[/say] he settles for finally, drawing back far enough to offer his friend a weary smile. [say]"Have you eaten anything today? I'm guessing no."[/say] Because if he were in Zavien's shoes he knows that self-care would have been the first thing to go by the wayside, that he'd be putting the needs of his people far above his own. And that Zavien would be the one forcing him to stop and eat a proper meal and take a shower and feel his feelings, so it's truly the least that Koa can do, providing a shoulder for his friend.
RE: Eye of a hurricane, listen to yourself churn - Zavien - 01-18-2026
Breathing in deep, he regains some of his composure, worried there might be other Breakers lingering like Koa. He straightens enough to clasp his friend on the arm, the reflexive smile lifting to his face even as he admits depressingly, [say]"First and last."[/say] It's the unfortunate truth that he doesn't get hung up on. It wasn't like he'd accepted the position for the public speaking opportunities.
The smile vanishes, a grimace passing over his features. [say]"Shoot. Erika is going to kill me. She left me a sandwich..."[/say] and he'd left it sitting at one of the booths, promising to go back for it later. If it's still there, he doubts it's any good after baking in the sun for hours. But he shakes his head, ignoring the bite of hunger as he says, [say]"I can eat later."[/say] Turning the focus back on Koa, his exhausted green eyes narrow in confusion and concern, trying to disguise the bit of hurt. [say]"When did you get back?"[/say]
RE: Eye of a hurricane, listen to yourself churn - Koa - 01-19-2026
He watches as Zavien re-dons his armor, wincing visibly at the 'First and last.' There should have been more - more speeches, more moments of community and camaraderie, more years for the Risen Sun to shine in his new role. But time is the thing they do not have, and Koa bites these thoughts back down, because if they focus on what will never be they'll never make it through life as it is.
Throwing his arm over Zavien's shoulder, Koa shakes his head. [say]"You can eat now,"[/say] he counters firmly, nudging his friend in the direction of the Tower and the kitchens that lie within. [say]"You're no use to anyone half-dead from hunger, and I for one don't feel like incurring Erika's wrath."[/say] He shudders dramatically for effect, relying on a shield of humor to waylay the protest Zavien's sure to make.
As for when he got back? Koa exhales forcefully, licking his lips as he glances away. [say]"We landed this morning. Got to the Greatwood and found a stack of letters waiting for me."[/say] Each more horrifying and frantic than the last one, most of which he'd finished on the skyship back. Running his free hand through his hair, Koa lets his bravado briefly fade. [say]"I shoulda been back sooner. I didn't mean to be gone so long."[/say] Only a season away from Stormbreak physically, but he'd pulled back from his friends and loved ones well prior to that.
RE: Eye of a hurricane, listen to yourself churn - Zavien - 01-19-2026
Despite the tiredness clinging to his limbs, Zavien knows there's more to do, more he should do with the limited time left, and he leans back ever so slightly against the gentle guidance of his friend. [say]"I - "[/say] But his argument is drowned by the silent rumble of his stomach from all the food talk, his body screaming with protest with even the smallest sign of resistance.
A loud sigh of defeat falls between them and he steps forward to go with the flow rather than against it. A small smile returns, ignoring the ache of coming loss. [say]"She is a terrifying woman."[/say] He has no doubt she'll continue to inspire fear and hunger in the people around her - wherever she decides to settle.
Always one to focus on others, Zavien turns into the one leading the way, guiding them into the new Tower and the well-stocked kitchen. His thoughts are on Koa and his long journey as he says, [say]"I'm sure you're hungry too. Let's see what we can scrounge up."[/say] Which could very well be a buffet with the preparations from everyone in the last few days. The space is overflowing with non-perishables as much as comfort foods for those who would need it in the coming weeks.
He pays the kitchen no mind, turning to squeeze Koa's arm, offering a genuine and relieved curve of his lips. [say]"I'm just glad you're back. It's been chaos without you."[/say] He'd felt listless, barely managing to keep his head above the madness trying to pull him into despair. Without his friend, he'd clung to his job like a lifeline, leaving little attention for himself, especially when nothing seemed to be going right. But his work would be over soon, the purpose gone, and he has to wonder... [say]"Did you get traveling out of your system? Or do you plan to go back out once the people are evacuated?"[/say] There's the unspoken question beneath, the worry of what had driven Koa to get so lost in his time away.
RE: Eye of a hurricane, listen to yourself churn - Koa - 01-19-2026
[say]"I could eat,"[/say] Koa answers with a valiant nonchalance that's immediately offset by the rumble of his stomach. Chuckling at his own bodily functions, he shakes his head with a wistful sigh. [say]"Honestly I can't remember the last time I had a real meal. Hunting and cooking your own meat is satisfying, don't get me wrong, but after a couple months of camping the need for a burger is real."[/say] It's still brevity wrapped around a core of terror, his relentless cheerfulness a flashlight in a deepening night. Not enough to make a difference, to expel the shadows from the cracks and corners, but perhaps enough to help guide the duo through the harrowing reality that is their lives.
The smells of the kitchen are strumming the strings of his stomach symphony when Zavien gives him another squeeze, his quiet words drawing Koa to a a shuddering stop. They cut like knives through his resolution, though the pain is from any accusation, only the helplessness Koa feels. Guilt tugs the corners of his lips, his eyes, threatening to rip his mask in two and reveal the hollow ache below it. [say]"I know. I'm sorry."[/say] Koa exhales softly, voice cracking as he searches Zavien for undeserved forgiveness. He never should have left, not after Lena, not with everything changing, he'd been so selfish, selfish and stupid and---
No. Koa inhales deeply, steeling himself again. He can't undo the things he fucked up; all he can do is be here now, for his city and his friend. As for traveling and the future? Again the Dragoon huffs a laugh, giving a shake of his shaggy head. [say]"Trust me, I am all traveled out. If I ever see a tent again, it'll be too soon."[/say] He's glad to be back in the safety of humor, though the mirth dims as his voice grows solemn. [say]"I haven't... haven't thought about what I'm gonna do. After. Right now all I have room to worry about is getting the people I care about to safety."[/say] And then with another sweep of bravado he adds: [say]"That and getting enough burgers in us that we puke."[/say]
RE: Eye of a hurricane, listen to yourself churn - Zavien - 01-19-2026
His lips quirked up. [say]"I can imagine."[/say] He hadn't been camping during his own travels, but he still knows what it's like to miss a home cooked meal, and having to put up with his own cooking for months would be more than hellish torture. By the end, he was craving Erika's cooking and the other chefs of Stormbreak. It makes him wonder what it would be like to live in a new place, to know he won't be able to come back for his comfort foods.
Stepping into the kitchen, he props his hands against the counter, turning serious at the apologies he hadn't meant to elicit. His head shakes, exhausted with hearing and expressing remorse for one thing or another. [say]"Nuh uh. No apologies. You're here now and that's all that matters."[/say] All the 'sorrys' in the worlds wouldn't change the past, and it wouldn't change how he feels about his friend.
Zavien leaves no room for argument, breezing past to find a bottle of water amidst the stores.
His eyes find Koa's again when he leans against the counter, face carefully neutral so he can support his friend without his own biases swaying him. It's not as hard as he'd expect when the plans - or lack thereof - are laid out. As long as Koa doesn't disappear into the woods again, Zavien can handle it. Who knows, they might end up settling in the same region again.
Nodding his head, he offers a sympathetic smile. [say]"Agreed. It's hard to think about where to go after when nothing will compare to Stormbreak..."[/say] Last time, it'd been easy to figure out, just going where the people were, the place he was needed. But that'd been temporary, and he'd had purpose. Now... he isn't so sure, and he can't afford to linger on that, or he might miss something his citizens need.
Letting Koa shift the conversation back to the safety of food and humor, Zavien nods to one side of the kitchen with an amused smirk. [say]"I think there's a pan of burgers and hotdogs in the fridge. I'll grab the buns and condiments if you want to pull them out."[/say]
RE: Eye of a hurricane, listen to yourself churn - Koa - 01-21-2026
Koa lans backwards against the counter, his hands propping him as he looks out upon the kitchen and its unusually bare staff. Most of people have gone home to plan their futures and hold their loved ones but a skeleton crew remains, valiantly whipping up enough food to feed their falling cities. Each of their faces holds a tableau of emotion as each of them grapples and comes and deals the very best they can.
Koa's heart aches for them all.
[Say]"Have you, though? Thought about it?"[/say] It's a tentative question, one that leaves as much room for dismissal as it does for answer. He's still looking outward, watching someone grapple with a stock pot large enough to hold a small child. A woman rushes over, grabbing the other handle and earning a laugh of relief. Together they hoist the heavy pot onto a waiting fire, then each turn to go back to their tasks. What is he going to do without that sort of teamwork, of camaraderie?
Will he ever feel at home again?
No no no. Ha has to keep his focus outward: on Zavien, his family, his people, food. Snapping up from the counter, he turns to Zav with a sharp salute. [Say]"Aye, Commander!"[/say]
A few questions and investigated coolers turns up the promised meat; Koa extracts his requisite amount triumphantly, ready to return the pan to the fridge when a hand grips his ear. Whirling in alarm, he finds himself looking down into the scowling face of one of the head cooks. Some chastisement and bullying later, and the Dragoon finds himself looking quite lost while standing in front of a massive griddle with a spatula in one hand and a pan of 100 uncooked patties in the other, because to quote the old woman, "If you're going to be using one of my stovetops you might as well be useful!'
RE: Eye of a hurricane, listen to yourself churn - Zavien - 01-21-2026
The staff weaves around them, in their own world and barely noticing their presence beyond a respectful nod - although a few girls giggle under their breaths at the attractive Dragoon. He's sure it's a nice distraction from the heaviness of everything else, one he wishes he could enjoy, yet equally happy that others can still find light in the chaos.
Dancing around a staff member carrying a large bag of potatoes, Zavien lifts a shoulder in response to Koa. [say]"A little - even though I don't want to."[/say] The thoughts sneak up on him at random times, quiet moments when he least expects it. Luckily, most of his time is spent on other people, helping coordinate their evacuation to whatever region they've chosen to settle in; but occasionally, a thought slips in, an opinion guiding his own future intentions - the ones he can address later.
Then Koa is being swept up in the food preparations, having been caught by the authoritarian head cook, Helga. Zavien tries to contain a small smile but gets caught by the fiery older woman. Uncaring of titles or physical prowess, she drags him by the ear to the cutting board next to the stove and roughly ties a pink apron around his thin waist before shoving a knife in his hand. Dumbfounded, he looks at the potatoes in front of him. At least there's no risk of him burning them.
Glancing to Koa next to him, he starts to slice the potatoes into fry shapes. His expression is pinched as he considers the earlier question, obviously distressed by the decision he has yet to make, one he doesn't want to make. Still, he fills the silence, never having been one to hide his thoughts. [say]"There are a few places I know I don't want to go, but I don't immediately feel drawn anywhere."[/say] Not like Stormbreak.
His knife continues to move, easing the weight of the topic as he asks, [say]"Will you follow your family?"[/say] Or Kai? Zavien hasn't seen Koa's cousin since their altercation, and he's not really had the time or desire to rectify that. But if they end up living near each other... He knows they'll have to see each other eventually.
RE: Eye of a hurricane, listen to yourself churn - Koa - 01-26-2026
Well, at least he's not the only one being put to work. Koa casts Zavien a befuddled glance as his friend is deposited at the next station down, a rather impressive mountain of potatoes teetering before the Risen Sun. He purses his lips, eyebrows eyebrows and shoulders rising and falling bemusedly, then laughs. [say]"Guess we gotta earn our keep,"[/say] Koa winks, flourishing his spatula in salute before turning his attention to the task before him.
Zavien's comment has Koa interested. [say]"Oh yeah? Like where?"[/say] he hums over five patties he's just set upon the stovetop, trying to balance his spatula on his fingertip as he waits for them to cook. As for following his kin? Koa shrugs. Top of the younger Dragoon's list of Nos is probably Hollowed Grounds, which unfortunately clashes directly with his family's plans - the older generations, at least.
[say]"Probably not - Noe's probably gonna bounce around exploring for a while, and our dad's going to the Grounds, and Kai..."[/say] He trails off with a grimace, catching the spatula before it can clatter to the floor. [say]"Last time we talked in person he told me he wanted to marry Flora, so that's, y'know. Kinda awk."[/say]
RE: Eye of a hurricane, listen to yourself churn - Zavien - 01-26-2026
Grinning at the playful spatula salute as much as the image of two Dragoons cooking in the kitchen, Zavien leans closer and whispers conspiratorially, [Say]"When don't we?"[/say] His eyes flicker to the stern chef, making sure she can't see the juvenile way he elbows Koa or the smile plastered on his face.
The knife is comfortable in his hand, but the slices are uneven as he works. Whether that's from his divided concentration or lack of skill seems irrelevant, the cutting continuing regardless of the conversation. His head tilts as he answers, [Say]"It's been awhile, but I don't think I could be comfortable enough in Halo to call it home."[/say] The few visits he's made have been full of unwelcome memories, and although they will certainly fade with time, he's not sure it's a place he'd ever feel happy being.
[Say]"And I'm not sure how I would feel about living with Flora as my leader after our recent disagreement,"[/say] he adds nonchalantly, his shoulders coming up in a shrug. It hadn't been enough of an argument to cut off the connection, but her response hadn't sat well with him, and serving her as a leader felt even worse, knowing how their ideals might clash.
Then there was the unknown, and his eyes narrow in concentration. [Say]"I haven't spent much time in the Grounds, but I get the sense it's not for me..."[/say] Not that he'd be against it, but he might need to spend more time there to decide if it was for him.
But the topic turns to Koa and Zavien is tensing at the mention of Kai, his breath catching. The knife work slows, nerves threading through his disciplined work as he asks tentatively, [Say]"So you've talked to him?"[/say]
RE: Eye of a hurricane, listen to yourself churn - Koa - 01-27-2026
Perplexed by Zavien's reticence toward Halo, Koa furrows his brows curiously toward his friend. [say]"No? Why no--- ohhhh, right."[/say] His handsome face contorts into a grimace as his memory finally catches up; he huffs a rueful, mirthless laugh. [say]"The whole dying there thing would put a damper on it. Or was there something else?"[/say] Not that having died in the cold isn't enough reason, of course.
The mention of Flora and disagreements has Koa again raising his eyebrows. [say]"'Disagreement', huh?"[/say] Koa repeats invitingly, leaning over to prod Zavien with his elbow should the other man need further prompting to share. [say]"Please tell me you aren't feuding with my ex on my account,"[/say] he teases, a little vainly, a little trepidatious. [say]"Gods know she could wipe the floor with us both."[/say] And if she couldn't her dads would be sure to nuke any pieces that were left.
The first of the burgers are ready to flip, the smell of browning meat causing Koa's water to mouth. With surprising finesse he sets about scraping them up and turning them over, the hiss of steam suppressing his voice as he distractedly answers: [say]"Hm? Yeah, right after LongNight he came back and we had it out. We've sent a couple letters since."[/say] He's too preoccupied with his cooking to notice how Zavien's tensing, though his own focused scowl doesn't much diminish once the patties are all flipped. [say]"Can't say I took the news with the most, uh, grace, but I've come to terms with it, y'know?"[/say] Though his expression says he clearly has some lingering thoughts on the affair.
RE: Eye of a hurricane, listen to yourself churn - Zavien - 01-27-2026
Smiling at Koa's delayed understanding, Zavien shakes his head. [say]"Nah, just the 'dying there' part. I'm not eager to relive it every time I step outside the gate."[/say] He chuckles, willing to put up with it occasionally, but not on a daily basis. Plus, the cold never really sat well with him.
He chops more potatoes, piling them high where someone else comes to retrieve them, supposedly to fry them. The probing doesn't get very far as he makes a point to avoid looking towards the burger cook, but the grimace is obvious. [say]"Not exactly..."[/say] But Koa's also not unrelated, and he waits patiently for the man to give his piece about reconnecting with Kai before he's sighing, his shoulders slumping slightly from the weight of it all. [say]"Well, that's a relief. Maybe he'll get off my back about it now."[/say]
Finally looking back to his friend, Zavien gives an apologetic shrug of his shoulders, knowing he's not going to help the strained relationship with what he has to say. [say]"When you were gone and he couldn't get ahold of you, Kai came to meet with me. He wanted me to promise not to tell you about him and Flora, but I told him I wouldn't lie if you asked me outright about it, but that I would try to send you his way if I saw you. It seemed fair enough to me."[/say] He sighs, shaking his head at the memory, the way the young man had exploded with panic and aggression. [say]"Well, he got pissed, said some things about me being dishonorable, then threatened to lie to Lena if I said anything to you..."[/say] His voice fades, more memories darkening his eyes as he looks down at the knife, pausing in his work as sorrow and hurt color his heart. For a moment, he stays still, contemplating how everything had gone so wrong.
Then he moves, slipping back into the rhythm of slicing and chopping as he gives another shrug of his shoulders. [say]"I chalked it up to young bullheadedness - gods know I can be like that - but it didn't sit right, and he'd been making all these bold promises on Flora's behalf, so when I saw her next, I made the stupid mistake to warn her about him threatening leaders."[/say] A small bit of hollow laughter cracks from his chest, regret evident in the pinch of his eyes. [say]"You can guess how well she took that..."[/say]
The attempt at a smile falls away, pain lining his forehead. [say]"She didn't pull her soldier support, but she made it very clear that I was an amateur leader and Stormbreak was nothing more than an ant in comparison to Torchline."[/say] Not in those words exactly, but the sentiment had been there, her venomous words shrinking him and his home down to something pathetic and insignificant. Zavien hadn't been able to stop thinking about it for days, trying to focus on the city's qualities rather than its paltry strength. Still, his lips purse even thinking about it now. [say]"I didn't appreciate that - not because we weren't struggling and barely beginning rebuild, but because she chose to use that as a threat, to shove it in my face when all I'd tried to do was help."[/say] Golden hair brushes his forehead as he shakes his head then raises his eyes to look at Koa when he finishes adding, [say]"She forgave me when I apologized again - when I went to tell her about Stormbreak falling - but I don't think I could live comfortably knowing that's who leads me..."[/say] Meaning Torchline is off the table for him, despite how 'powerful' it may be.