+- Court of the Fallen (https://cotf-rpg.com)
+-- Forum: Out of Character (https://cotf-rpg.com/forumdisplay.php?fid=26)
+--- Forum: Important (https://cotf-rpg.com/forumdisplay.php?fid=27)
+---- Forum: Archives (https://cotf-rpg.com/forumdisplay.php?fid=38)
+---- Thread: you never asked if I had something to hide (/showthread.php?tid=11846)
you never asked if I had something to hide - Vesper - 08-05-2025
Vesper grimaces, the expression sharp and fleeting beneath his mask. [say]"The others were smaller,"[/say] he mutters, voice like ground glass. [say]"Or less lubricated. Or both."[/say]
He follows without hesitation; head high, shoulders tight, moving like someone too proud to hunch and too stubborn to stay behind. His chin tips up slightly, as if that alone might keep the nausea from winning, as if the posture will anchor him better than the ground beneath his feet. It’s not elegant, not really. It’s survival dressed in poise.
The further they move from the crush of bodies, the more the noise begins to ease. Not vanish, but fade, like a migraine backing down just enough to let the world in at the edges again. Thoughts become voices instead of thunderclaps. Desires dim to background noise. His own skull stops feeling like it might split in half from the pressure. He exhales sharply, breath gusting from his lungs as if he’d been holding it the whole walk. One ringed hand lifts to drag through his hair, knocking the silver-threaded hood back just enough to tangle in the pale strands before it drops to brace at the back of his neck.
[say]"How do you do it?"[/say] he asks, voice still low but steadier now. His eyes flick to Jack, the blue of them cooler but no less raw for the clarity. [say]"And don't fucking say practice—"[/say] He holds up a finger, deadpan despite the sweat beading at his temple.
RE: you never asked if I had something to hide - Jack - 08-05-2025
Jack follows the now well-worn trail through the trees flanked by softly glowing lanterns and the pale, jaunty decorations of paper ghosts. As he walks he's already unclasping the ragged cloak from his shoulders, hanging it on a low branch without breaking stride to leave a phantom fluttering at the side of the path in his wake. Beneath he's dressed like himself if not entirely in black - pants, shirt (still half untucked, Flora), waistcoat - and he reaches up, too, to unfasten the mask from around his eyes.
[say]"You ever seen one of those pictures made outta layers of glass?"[/say] he asks; with a silent pulse of willpower, a cool breeze whips up around them as they walk. [say]"Where each bit of glass has one part of the picture, but only when you look right through it can you see it all?"[/say] Tossing his mask into the undergrowth, he turns and holds out a clenched hand to the boy - when it opens, a sphere of ice sits in his palm for Vesper to take.
[say]"It's kinda like that. You're lookin' at everythin' right now with just one piece of glass. You gotta learn to separate it out so you can be in a crowd with only the important shit in mind. Is this person dangerous, is that person thinkin' about me, all that crap."[/say] He shrugs, finally drawing to a halt on the path once he feels they're far enough away. [say]"...But you do gotta practice at it,"[/say] he adds with a sharp smile.
RE: you never asked if I had something to hide - Vesper - 08-05-2025
Vesper squints at Jack like he’s just started reciting poetry at a knife fight. The metaphor earns a long pause and a look that says, what the fuck glass are you talking about, but he doesn’t interrupt. His silence isn’t deference so much as survival—every extra word still feels like a threat to his composure, but he also knows Jack isn't one to wax poetic for his own fucking health. So he listens, jaw still tight, breath shallow, and when the ice is offered, he takes it without hesitation.
His fingers close around the sphere, pressing it first to one temple, then the other, sighing into the cold like it might leech the tension from his bones. For a moment he just stands there, eyes half-lidded behind the mask, shoulders slowly beginning to drop from where they’d been riding high against his ears. [say]"It’s not just the thoughts,"[/say] he says eventually, voice roughened by restraint. [say]"Even when I picked one—just one—everything else was still vibrating in the background. Like a thousand tuning forks all ringing at once, each one expecting me to pay attention."[/say] He lets the ice trail down the side of his neck before curling his fingers around it again.
[say]"I could barely keep track of Nova and Caly,"[/say] he admits, eyes narrowed at some middle distance. [say]"Not with all the shit people were thinkin' around them."[/say] He doesn’t elaborate on that part, though his lip curls faintly in distaste.
There’s a flicker of frustration behind the words, but it’s not ego. It’s the quiet, simmering kind that comes when someone who’s used to being in control suddenly isn’t. Like trying to walk across water only to realise you’ve sunk ankle-deep without noticing. He glances at Jack, not with a plea this time, but something like reluctant curiosity. [say]"The uh..web you've got goin'..."[/say] Though he'd only seen the inside of his dear old dad's mind just the once, it wasn't the sort of thing he'd forgotten. [say]"..how do you keep the rest of it still?"[/say]
RE: you never asked if I had something to hide - Jack - 08-05-2025
[say]"Murph is keepin' an eye on 'em for the rest of the night,"[/say] Jack says of Nova and Caly, and though he doesn't open his mind for the boy, knowing better than to offer anything when the magic has been rubbed so raw for so long, the ease with which he offers the remark should say it all. Jack wouldn't ask just anyone to watch after them.
Shoving his hands in his pockets and letting his gaze drop almost too casually off down the path, the discomfort at Vesper's question is written all over his body, even if he sounds as casual as ever when he speaks again. [say]"You don't,"[/say] he says. [say]"At least, I don't, not usually. If I gotta, it's like the wall we build against each other, but just... turned the other way."[/say]
Frowning and glancing at Vesper as if to ask if that makes sense, eventually he just shrugs. [say]"Gets easier the more you get exposed to it, but... yeah. It'll fuck you up if you let it,"[/say] he says. [say]"You think you'll be able to go back once you've had a break, or are you done with this place?"[/say]
RE: you never asked if I had something to hide - Vesper - 08-05-2025
Vesper nods at the mention of Murphy, something like relief flickering behind his eyes. Good. Murphy’s steady, grounded, and not easily distracted, and more than that, he’s not the type to let Nova’s sparkle or Caly’s warmth cloud his judgment. Vesper would trust him with his sisters a thousand times over before trusting the rest of this crowd with a glance.
Quietly, he unhooks the strap of his mask and slips it off, dragging the porcelain away and raking his fingers across his face. His temples throb faintly beneath the touch, his lashes heavy with exhaustion he hasn’t earned through motion, only noise. Noise and pressure and the godsdamn ache of trying.
[say]"Doesn’t that make you feel..."[/say] he begins, then trails off, scrubbing at one eye before finishing, [say]"...like you’re standin’ out there with your fingers in your ears?"[/say] The idea of flipping the wall inward, of softening the borders, sounds like opening the door and begging the storm to come in. He stares into the trees as if they might answer for him, eyes catching the flicker of lantern light beyond the branches.
How does everyone else do it? Just...wandering around without a fucking clue for how vulnerable they were at all times, with no failsafes, no early warning system, no way of seeing through the bullshit.
[say]"I did want to see Colt,"[/say] he admits, a little too offhandedly to be casual, but Jack's been around the rancher often enough that there's no way the captain hasn't picked up at least a bit of what's goin' on between them. He glances back toward the masquerade, then exhales through his nose, the sound worn thin. [say]"But fuck, Jack. I dunno."[/say] He shifts the melting ice to the side, letting it cry down his neck. [say]"I’m tired,"[/say] Vesper says softly, and it’s not dramatic, not even resentful. Just the bare truth, said like someone who’s been running on high for too long without ever letting himself pause. His posture remains straight, too proud to sag, but his voice gives him away. He’s not sulking, he’s just worn out and though vulnerability isn't really a trait Jack has passed down to his kids, for once Vesper doesn't even bother to try and hide it.
RE: you never asked if I had something to hide - Jack - 08-05-2025
[say]"Yeah, it really does,"[/say] Jack says through a scoff, raking his fingers back through his hair and, now that they're finally out of the masquerade properly, tying it into a loose knot with a band around his wrist. [say]"I learned early that I preferred the... all of it, than wanderin' around blind. Well - not blind, but y'know."[/say] And that's the thing. Vesper does know, of all the people in the world.
[say]"She wanted to see you too. Surprise, though - s'hard to find a specific Ludo in a crowd of Ludos, I guess."[/say] Raising an eyebrow at Vesper, though, Jack has indeed been able to piece enough (and plenty more) about the rancher during his meetings with her, let alone the things he's picking up on now. [say]"You sweet on her, kid?"[/say] he asks with a smirk.
But then Vesper says he's tired, and it's a mirror that Jack avoids looking into on the best of days, and especially not now, when their shared weaknesses spill out into the open through a younger version of himself. But liquor has eroded more than one of the high walls around him, and he reaches out to clap the boy on the shoulder, squeezing. [say]"There'll be other times. C'mon. I got the Ark out with the other skyships - you can sleep there."[/say]
RE: you never asked if I had something to hide - Vesper - 08-05-2025
Vesper glances over at Jack, the corner of his mouth twitching—not quite a smile, but something close to it. He hasn’t lived with this gift long enough to call it a burden the way Jack does, and maybe that’s why he doesn’t fully appreciate how rare these conversations are, or how much they must have cost the captain once. But still, he nods, slow and certain. [say]"Yeah,"[/say] he says, voice low and thoughtful. [say]"I can’t imagine ever turnin’ it all the way off. Even with someone I trust..."[/say] He exhales through his nose, gaze flicking briefly skyward. [say]"I’ve already heard too much. There’s no goin’ back once you know what it sounds like when people lie with a smile, or say shit just 'cause they think it's what you wanna hear."[/say]
As for Colt, Vesper doesn’t ask how Jack knew, just bounces his eyebrows at the captain behind his maskless face, expression dry as dusk. [say]"Her mind,"[/say] he says, with the air of someone offering a compliment that most people wouldn’t recognize as one, [say]"is like sittin’ out on a porch just before a storm rolls in. You can feel it building in the air. Smell the ozone. Watch the clouds stack like gods gearing up for a brawl."[/say] He shrugs a shoulder. [say]"It’s vast, becautiful, and just crazy enough to make you wanna stay and see how it hits."[/say]
He casts one more look over his shoulder, back toward the masquerade. The music still filters faintly through the trees, a ghost of revelry distant enough not to hurt. If Nova or Caly come looking, Murphy will be able to tell them somethin' believable enough that they wouldn't rush off with worry. As he turns back toward Jack, his voice dips into something quieter, almost conspiratorial. [say]"Y’know, one of Safrin’s old demigods used to be able to make these little pocket worlds. Just—snap,"[/say] he says, flicking his fingers, [say]"and you had your own space carved outta nothin’. No noise. No minds. Just quiet."[/say] It's what had gotten Seren killed in the end, but nevermind. [say]"Fuck if I’m not tempted to find a way to make one. Just so I can take a nap."[/say]
RE: you never asked if I had something to hide - Jack - 08-05-2025
[say]"Mm, you should though,"[/say] Jack says, almost under his breath as they begin walking again, the captain shoving his hands in his pockets. [say]"Even if it's just for an hour, or even a minute. Learn to shut it all out - just so you know how, if nothin' else. Else that headache you got is gonna be part of your life."[/say] Jack has never been able to shut it off entirely - never been brave enough to try - and in his decades of walking through life with that sort of magic, he's often rendered without any defence at all against the tide of thought.
Smirking as conversation turns to Colt - because gods, he knew it would be about her mind before anything else - Jack listens quietly, his footsteps careful on the dirt path as they head out and away from even the glowing lanterns, towards where he knows the Ark is lazily moored in the skies overhead. [say]"Sounds nice,"[/say] he mutters. [say]"Flora's was like walkin' through this huge garden. Pockets of peace an' joy an' then the wildest shit around the corner. Took some navigatin', but worth it."[/say] It's the first - perhaps the only - time he's spoken about the Doubletake's mind with someone else, Jack inhaling deeply and letting it out again.
[say]"Don't fuck it up if you like it,"[/say] he concludes, glancing over his shoulder as well and tilting his head as Vesper speaks of pocket dimensions and napping. [say]"You'd go that far?"[/say] He scoffs. [say]"I guess if you're still learnin' to live with it all, makes sense. Tonight all I can give you is a locked door though, so don't go expectin' miracles."[/say]
RE: you never asked if I had something to hide - Vesper - 08-05-2025
Vesper lifts a brow at Jack, a little sideways glance that borders on incredulous. Coming from the man who looks like he’s had a decade-long headache tattooed into the lines around his eyes, it’s almost funny. But rather than say it—and risk Jack doubling down on some godawful metaphor involving ship rigging and mental rigour or the fucking glass again—he just nods slowly, muttering under his breath, [say]"I’ll give it a try."[/say] Y'know, when it didn't feel like his skull was full of splitered glass.
But then Jack starts talking about Flora, and whatever softness might’ve been folded into that admission is immediately lost on Vesper, who lets out a sharp snort that cuts through the quiet like a blade. [say]"Speakin' from experience, huh?"[/say] he drawls, one brow lofting higher now with unmistakable amusement if only because he was certain all of Torchline knew the captain and the queen's business, or at least Flora's side of things.
As they walk further from the masquerade, the stars bloom clearer overhead, and the soft glow of the Ark begins to peek between the trees like something waiting. Like home, if you squinted hard enough and weren’t too particular. [say]"Go that far?"[/say] Vesper echoes, letting out a low, humourless chuckle. [say]"Considerin' it doesn't take much to get Safrin's attention, doesn't seem like goin' far at all, and if it means gettin’ some damn sleep, I'll do just about anything she asks."[/say]
He casts a sidelong glance toward the Ark, then back at Jack, smirking faintly. [say]"But tonight? I’ll take the locked door. If the worst I hear’s the cook wankin’ off in the galley, it’ll be a good fuckin’ night."[/say]
RE: you never asked if I had something to hide - Jack - 08-05-2025
[say]"Let me know what it's like if you manage it."[/say] Smirking, Jack slows his steps as they emerge from the woods into a clearing close enough to the Stone Symphony that he can hear the distant rush of water. Overhead, a few skyships drift lazily in their moorings, awaiting passengers to take them to the far and wide reaches of Caido. The Ark is amongst them, her ruddy sails and laquered wood making her entirely black in the darkness.
[say]"You fuckin' know I am,"[/say] he says curtly to Vesper about fucking up relationships, resisting the urge to roll his eyes. [say]"Then again, never say never. You might not've seen Colt tonight, but I was a lot luckier with Flora."[/say] And then some.
Snorting - Jack had meant going as far to magic up a place for sleep rather than, you know, just asking to be left alone for a bit - he nevertheless shrugs his shoulders and pushes up his sleeve. [say]"Bet she just sings you a lullaby and lets you snooze at her shrine whenever you visit,"[/say] he says. [say]"And Lazarus doesn't wank off in the galley, though I saw him lookin' at a cucumber real funny once. Anyway, wait here."[/say]
Touching his fingers to the tattoo on his wrist, Jack quite simply vanishes from sight in the way Vesper often does when he misty steps. A minute or two passes, during which the boy might see a few lantern lights wink into life on The Ark, and a thick rope ladder is tossed over the side for him to climb. Or at least climb until he's in range to magic his way on board.
RE: you never asked if I had something to hide - Vesper - 08-05-2025
Vesper snickers under his breath at Jack’s sharp tone, the sound low and unbothered. It’s good, in some strange way, to hear the captain admit it aloud—for all the silence that usually fills the gaps between them, that kind of honesty lands sharper than any lecture might. At the mention of being luckier, though, Vesper just shakes his head. [say]"Sure,"[/say] he drawls, gaze flicking skyward toward the drifting shape of the Ark, [say]"but are you really sayin' that bein' lucky in the woods is worth all the drama it’s gonna come with?"[/say] By which of course he doesn't just mean Flora likely turning up wondering what she and the captain were now, but also the fact that Jack had outed Caly's little puppy dog bf for also having slept with Flora. [say]"Can't imagine any garden's worth all that."[/say]
Grimacing, the young demigod shakes his head, muttering something about never eating on the Ark again just as the captain vanishes. Left in the clearing with nothing but the trees, the dark, and the soft rush of the Stone Symphony in the distance, Vesper presses his tongue to the inside of his cheek and waits. Sure enough, lanterns begin to wink to life above, warm light blooming against the Ark’s dark hull. When the rope ladder drops, he’s already moving. With a whisper of mist and thought, he flickers to the base of the rope, catching it with one hand and climbing just high enough to misty-step the rest of the way onto the deck. The air up here is cooler, clearer. Quieter. The noise below fades until it’s nothing but memory such that Vesper feels like he can finally fucking breathe.
Once aboard, he casts a glance at Jack’s wrist when the captain reappears, nodding once in quiet approval. [say]"Clever,"[/say] he says, gesturing toward the tattoo with a subtle lift of his chin. [say]"Surprised you never asked Safrin for magic doors or some shit for your room."[/say] But then, because Vesper is no sentimental idiot, adds: [say]"unless that's on some future wishlist."[/say] For when the captain inevitably said yes to even more siblings.
RE: you never asked if I had something to hide - Jack - 08-05-2025
[say]"That's the thing about havin' a ship, Vesper. Shit gets too dramatic, you can just sail somewhere else for a bit,"[/say] Jack says with the sort of roguish ease that comes from doing just that for over two decades. [say]"Though I could equally say that it's no good sittin' on a porch that's in love with you when you might only plan to swing your feet from the deck for a bit. Sounds like you're invitin' drama there, too."[/say]
But then he's gone, albeit only for a few moments, and no sooner has he half lowered the ladder when Vesper magically stutter steps aboard. Grunting his approval and leaving the ladder for one of the night watch to draw it up and keep an eye out for the rest of the crew when, eventually, they come back in dribs and drabs, he glances down at his wrist. [say]"Plenty of shit on my wishlist. I really want a roomba mop that does the job itself, so I don't gotta worry about these shitheads wastin' time on purpose."[/say]
Brushing past Vesper, he leads them towards, of course, his own cabin, gesturing towards it once they're close enough. [say]"Key's in the door on the other side. Quietest place on the ship."[/say] And he can take that as gospel when it comes from Jack.
RE: you never asked if I had something to hide - Vesper - 08-05-2025
Vesper snorts softly at the idea of just sailing away. [say]"Wish it were that easy,"[/say] he mutters, his gaze flicking back toward the dark horizon where the masquerade still flickers like an ember trying to reignite. [say]"Hard to pull anchor when your sisters are tethered to the docks."[/say] That, and because he hasn't spent nearly two decades scrounging up a crew and a ship that he'd put any amount of trust in, but he gets the appeal.
He shoots a sideways glance at Jack, eyes glinting faintly in the lantern glow. [say]"Oh yeah? Well word around the rum fountain is that if you do start shit up with Flora again and try to sail off into the fuckin’ sunset, the Ark might not be welcome back in Torchline."[/say] He shrugs, one shoulder rising and falling in a lazy roll. [say]"That was the rumour when it all went down, anyhow."[/say] It was all fine and dandy to talk of gettin' lucky and then fuckin' off, but Vesper thought perhaps his dear old dad needed to take some of his own advice to either hold onto the things he liked or to stop makin' waves.
But it’s the porch comment that cuts a little closer. At Jack’s phrasing—in love with you—Vesper straightens just a touch too quickly, the movement smooth but sharp enough to betray a flicker of unease. His eyes narrow, the blue of them a little flintier now. [say]"You need to get your hearin’ checked, old man,"[/say] he says, tone dry as ash, but there's a flicker of something uncertain beneath it. He’s not entirely sure if he believes himself, which is perhaps the most dangerous part.
Luckily, the conversation turns before he has to dwell in it. At Jack’s mop comment, Vesper raises a brow. [say]"A mop?"[/say] he echoes, arching a brow in disbelief. [say]"You’re tellin’ me you’ve got the power to push this ship around with your own winds and summon storms with a thought, but a mop is outta your league?"[/say]
With a grin, Vesper follows Jack down the corridor, tapping his fingers once across the wood, knuckles light and rhythmic before shooting the captain a sharp, wolfish grin. [say]"Not that I don't appreciate it, but whose bed are you plannin’ to sleep in tonight if I'm in here?"[/say]
RE: you never asked if I had something to hide - Jack - 08-06-2025
[say]"One day maybe it'll be your sisters who shove you into the sea to get you on your way,"[/say] Jack points out with a smirk. He doesn't begrudge the boy his protectiveness, but he can equally see Caly and Nova wanting to stretch their wings out from beneath their brother's shadow eventually.
Snorting and resisting the urge to give Vesper a brisk shove, if only because he's well aware of how delicate he'd been earlier, Jack leans against the wall outside his cabin and raises his eyebrows. [say]"How 'bout you focus on your own dick instead of mine? I know it might come as a surprise, but I also know the word around the rum fountain."[/say] What with them both being telepaths.
As his remarks about the porch strike home, though, Jack can only scoff out a laugh and raise his hands as if to drop it (though he won't, not internally), reaching out to push open the cabin door for Vesper to go in whenever he's ready. [say]"A mop is more difficult than storms - an' shadows an' teleportation for that matter. If I'm wrong, you make one when you've had your nap,"[/say] he challenges.
Already stepping away as if to trail back down the corridor, his shrug is all too casual. [say]"I dunno yet,"[/say] he says over his shoulder. [say]"That ain't your problem, though. Sleep well, kid."[/say]
~FIN