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playing house - Loren - 10-01-2019
The Manor felt empty, even though it was supposedly filled with people. Still, Loren was used to feeling alone in his house by now; given how lonely he was everywhere else, it made sense to him that his house did not feel like a home. He hadn’t really earned the right to a home, he felt. Besides, given how he kept driving people away, he supposed he deserved this feeling.
Although he had quite a bit of work to do, he found that he lacked the energy to do much of anything. So, while it just added to the guilt, he’d made himself a cup of tea, then shuffled over to the library. At least if he was reading something relevant, he could tell himself he was being efficient. It would be the least of the lies he told himself these days.
Dressed in comfortable, but completely ugly brown wool—it hung off his gaunt frame in a worrisome way, not that anyone paid much attention to that—he picked up the book on LongNight that Jigano had given the summoner. While he’d already read it twice, he figured a third time couldn’t hurt, given the danger they were facing. However, he found himself reading the same sentence over and over and over again. Sighing, he took a sip of the now lukewarm tea, then set it down on a nearby table and rubbed his eyes. Gods he was tired.
RE: playing house - Abasi - 10-01-2019
For the first time in quite a while, Abasi had woken up himself. Foggy and grumpy as usual, but the Blight didn't seem to be lurking in his mind; it was like he had had a fever that had lifted overnight. At first he had spent some time just sitting up in bed and hugging his knees, staring at the wall and wondering just what all of this had to mean. Because it had to mean something.
When he eventually couldn't turn up an answer, he got up and got dressed, mostly in clothes borrowed from the manor - he wore his own rings, though. His jewellry looked strange next to the warm, practical winter clothing, their dull gold and shining stones belonging to another place and time entirely. A place not so damned cold; as he left his room he rubbed his arms and gritted his teeth, wondering when this chill was going to end.
In search for food, company or perhaps a magical portal to Egypt (though he had accepted by now that was unlikely) he came down the stairs and wandered from room to room, until he ended up somewhere that almost reminded him of home. The shelves of books, similar to his own study with the scrolls and papers everywhere, the windows to observe the stars. And there, sat reading, was his saviour of sorts.
Formally, stiffly, Abasi walked over to Loren and when he was about a metre away, he stopped and bowed his head. [say]"I...wish to thank you, for housing me through my sickness."[/say] As much as he wished Loren hadn't seen him in his more embarrassing moments (which he could not quite remember, but was sure existed) he was grateful for having had the chance to rest out most of his illness within a house with a warm bed and someone to care for him.
RE: playing house - Loren - 10-01-2019
Loren had gotten so used to being alone in the Manor that when the door to the library opened his head shot up and he looked around, shock writ large on his features and magic dancing at the tip of his fingers. Astra couldn’t open doors and the luxere was basically the only one he spent time with, so he really had not been expecting to see anyway while he was at home. However, it didn’t take long for him to see that it was Abasi, though that didn’t necessarily mean the summoner could relax, given the blight. [say]”Abasi?”[/say] Mostly, the Launceleyn was confused: they hadn’t really seen each other much since the day Loren locked the other man away, though once the blight had receded the Launeleyn should’ve checked on Abasi and before then the summoner had tried to check in and at least make sure the other man was safe and fed. Still, Loren felt a twang of guilt for not doing a better job.
And that guilty feeling just intensified as Abasi went and thanked the Launceleyn. Setting the book aside, he picked up the mug and curled his fingers around it while shaking his head. [say]”No need to thank me. It was the least I could do. And I’m glad to see you’re looking and feeling better.”[/say] Loren, on the other hand, looked much worse these days than he had at the beginning of the season. Still, he hadn’t gone through the blight, so he couldn’t exactly compare to those who had.
RE: playing house - Abasi - 10-03-2019
[say]"Yes?"[/say] Abasi responded, a little confused. Had Loren forgotten him already? Or perhaps he had been so ill with the Blight that his host had not expected him to return alive.
It seemed despite his recovery and that of everyone around them, Loren was in poor spirits. Abasi watched him sip his tea and sighed, hands in his pockets. He had never been good at this: comforting people or finding something to say when awkwardness spread out over a room. In his old life he had either had people he gave commands to or those he shared spiritual opinions with and when those things were through, they did not stick around for small talk.
But he probably owed it to Loren to try, after he had stayed in the manor so long. Looking around for a chair and dragging one over, he sat opposite and loosely clasped his hands together. [say]"A man with a house as large as this and such power should not look so miserable. Many would kill for what you have."[/say]
RE: playing house - Loren - 10-03-2019
The confusion in the other man’s eyes made the summoner realize how he must have come across. [say]”Sorry. I just realized that I hadn’t seen you in a while, that’s all.”[/say] Or at least that’s what it felt like. Of course, he hadn’t seen much of anyone, really, outside of work and LongNight preparations. Only some of that was by choice: too many people were close to Remi, not that the Launceleyn could blame them. However, it made it hard for him to actually talk to anyone about all the things he’d been through. Granted, even if he had a sympathetic ear, he probably wouldn’t have said anything at all.
[say]”How are you feeling?”[/say] Just because Abasi looked better didn’t mean he actually was better; Loren knew the blighted were on the mend, but he was also fully aware that they were fully recovered yet. Unfortunately, while the Roses had done their job, the only remaining cure for the other man was time. And they didn’t seem to have a whole lot of that these days, unfortunate as that might sound.
As Abasi pulled up a chair, the summoner took a sip of his tea. The two of them hadn’t really spoken, not really. Loren had tried to provide the other man what comfort the Launceleyn could, but it had been difficult with the blight and everything going on in the summoner’s life. Perhaps that was why he was so surprised by Abasi’s words. [say]”What power?”[/say] Magical power maybe, but not the power to do anything about anything that really mattered. Loren glanced around at the room they were in, trying to take in all the details that he’d seen many times before. [say]”They can have it. The power, the house, everything. May it bring them the joy it never brought me.”[/say] Indeed, the Manor was haunted with too many ghosts for him to ever really be comfortable there. But it was the only home he had. Perhaps that was fitting then, since he was little more than a ghost himself.
RE: playing house - Abasi - 10-03-2019
How was he feeling? A difficult question. Even before the Blight Abasi had felt absolutely awful in this place, cast away from his home and flung into an unfamiliar environment that was always far too cold and wet. But now that he'd seen the depths of illness and come out the other side, Caido itself no longer seemed quite so bad. He was not happy to be there, but no longer as irritated. As for his physical health...
[say]"Sometimes I am struggling to think clearly. But I think that is it's last lingering mark."[/say] Hopefully, one that would fade with time. [say]"I hope that I did not say or do anything too offensive to you during the course of my sickness."[/say] He barely remembered it, except for speaking to Loren on the stairs, angry about...something.
Abasi laughed sharply at what power? Was it not obvious? [say]"The magic you yield. A man so skilled with heka could impress even the Pharoah in my city."[/say] But it seemed despite this power and the house that spanned so much space it seemed absurd to him, Loren was not happy.
[say]"What would bring you joy? If you have not found it in this you must be a hard man to please."[/say] He commented, unaware of the irony of himself accusing anyone of such a thing.
RE: playing house - Loren - 10-04-2019
It seemed that Abasi was mostly better. At least that much had gone right: as everything else was falling apart around the Launceleyn, he had the comfort of knowing that one person’s life had been improved by the summoner’s actions. It probably wouldn’t be enough, but it was something. [say]”Well, I think we all struggle to think clearly sometimes. However, I am glad to hear the worst of it has passed.”[/say] Gods, let that be true.
Loren took a sip as the other man continued speaking, though the Launceleyn shook his head as the tea ran down his throat. [say]”You were fine. Trust me, you did not offend me in the slightest.”[/say] Abasi hadn’t done or said anything worse than the summoner had told himself time and time again; besides, most of Loren’s recent strife came from someone much closer to the Launceleyn than the other man was.
However, when Abasi started using unfamiliar words, the summoner’s eyes narrowed, and he set his tea aside for a moment. [say]”Heka? Pharoah?”[/say] Loren hoped he was saying those words right, but the foreign syllables felt heavy and tangled on his tongue. [say]”Are those words from your world?”[/say] It was always dangerous to ask a question like that—both because it worsened the feelings of homesickness most Outlanders felt and because sometimes the worlds others came from were so alien it baffled the mind—but seeing as the other man had brought it up first, the Launceleyn figured it was fair for him to ask.
The next words out of Abasi’s mouth caught Loren completely off guard. He frowned, and picked up his mug, staring at the dark liquid within as if it was a scrying bowl, as the legends spoke of. Or maybe he was trying to gaze at the tea leaves, which were also purported to have prophetic qualities. Unfortunately, the tea held no answers, no more than his mind did. [say]”Probably. I’ve been told that I’m quite, quite difficult.”[/say] It hurt to say those words, because Remi and Ronin, and all those who’d once cared for the Launceleyn had been the ones to tell the summoner that. [say]”I don’t know, really. Once upon a time I would’ve said friendship. Family. Companionship. Love. Things that no amount of magic or the biggest house in the world can provide.”[/say] But all those were beyond Loren now. And saying that he liked to read in what little spare time he had seemed like far too small and petty a response.
RE: playing house - Abasi - 10-04-2019
Abasi nodded - though he suspected Loren's words were a kindness rather than the truth. From what he remembered of his time Blighted, his mind had been filled with endless pools of hate and rage. He was sure what had come out of his mouth, even if it had only been a fraction of what he had felt, had been vile.
He was thrilled to be asked about Egypt. So far, no one had asked him to describe much of his home and he dearly missed it (and bragging about it). [say]"Yes. Heka is what you would call magic. Though..."[/say] He frowned, unsure if it was wise to admit this (and it hurt him a little) but added: [say]"...the magic here is more impressive."[/say]
[say]"As for Pharaoh, he was our King. A God, in human form. Like all the Pharaohs before him."[/say] Abasi spoke with the reverence of a true believer on this subject, an enthusiasm in his voice that he rarely held for anything else. [say]"I was the most senior Priest in his service. I assisted Pharaoh in speaking to the Gods."[/say] To go from a place so respected to nothing at all in Caido had been hard, and getting to speak of his prior life made him feel a little better.
The man's answer was more emotional than Abasi had expected and it showed on his face. He was uncomfortable with matters of relationships, especially the subject of love. Also, he fully believed magic could provide love, but he felt that likely wouldn't help. [say]"...Could you not...have those things? It seems you are a popular man. I have noticed a few people around the house. You are not ugly, either."[/say]
RE: playing house - Loren - 10-05-2019
Loren was a bit surprised by Abasi’s enthusiastic reaction to the Launceleyn’s question, not that the other man would know it from the summoner’s mostly impassive face. Still, he far preferred discussing Abasi and his former life, than Loren's own, especially since the other man seemed so eager to do so. [say]”I’m sure the magic of your land had its own impressive qualities. What could you do with heka?”[/say] The word fell from the summoner’s tongue more easily the second time; he had been a scholar of some of the most arcane and esoteric texts once upon a time, and even now he had a knack for languages.
The reverence and awe in the other man’s voice was apparent. The Launceleyn had felt similarly about the rulers of his world, once upon a time. However, they’d proven themselves unworthy, as the rulers of the Hollowed Grounds were swiftly proving themselves to be as well. [say]”That’s quite impressive.”[/say] Loren too had the ears of the royals in his old life—and his new life too, he supposed—but he’d never had the ears of the gods, not in either world. [say]”Other than the Pharoah, what gods did you speak to?”[/say] Presumably, if the pride in Abasi’s voice and posture was any indication, the deities of his land were powerful and selective in who they spoke to.
However, they both grew uncomfortable and stiff when the conversation swung around to the summoner. Luckily, he was well used to people not wanting to talk about him. In fact, it didn’t even bother him anymore. [say]”No.”[/say] His voice wasn’t sad, or bitter, or anything really, except weary and accepting. For a few good reasons, but mostly bad ones, Loren knew he’d end up alone. [say]”Appearances can be deceiving. I am not particularly well-liked by anyone. As for the others in the Manor, they needed a temporary space to stay, nothing more.”[/say] The last comment from Abasi gave the Launceleyn pause. [say]”Thanks for the compliment, though I can hardly compare with someone like you.”[/say] He wasn’t quite sure why he added that last part, besides the fact that something that sounded so much like flirtation made him uncomfortable, and he was under no illusion which of the two of them was more attractive.
RE: playing house - Abasi - 10-06-2019
What could you do with heka? It was hard to explain to someone who did not have the concept breathed into them from birth, but Abasi would try. [say]"Heka...is bot just the magic - he is also a God. To use the power you must invoke the God. He is mighty, even the other Gods fear him, so you must make sure to give him respect."[/say] Even just now, speaking of him, Abasi's voice was quieter than usual, as if maintaining some kind of peace in a temple.
[say]"But...your magic is much more show and excitement. Ours is in the successful birth of a child or in a good harvest blessed by the Gods. In a future planned out for Pharaoh."[/say] When he said it like that, as much as he believed in and loved the magic of his home, it sounded like he was trying to dress up something much more basic than Caido's powers.
At least their Gods were impressive; moreso than the silent and paltry few this world possessed. [say]"Osiris, Lord of the dead and rising from it - he gives us our --or..gave us our barley to grow. Sobek, the Nile God that protected Pharaoh, in the form of a great crocodile...Horus, Isis, Ra...each God is important; each has a space in the city. A temple or a shrine. As the Pharaoh's contact I helped to speak to them all, though..."[/say] He paused, as if wondering if he should share this secret. [say]"I did have ones I preferred to consult over others."[/say]
When the subject was not on the memories of his home but on the life of the man before him, it seemed the mood was determinedly sour. [say]"No. I am not a man prone to flattery so I would not tell you this were it not honest - I like you. I don't like many people. As for the looks, it's subjective, but..."[/say] He shrugged. [say]"Self-deprecation is a waste of time you could spend improving what is wrong."[/say]
RE: playing house - Loren - 10-06-2019
As Abasi explained how the magic of his world worked, Loren tried to follow along, but it wasn’t easy. It was so far from the spells that the summoner cast and the rigid systems that he knew that he wasn’t even sure if it was magic at all, or something else entirely. Still arcane, perhaps, just not structured neatly. [say]”So heka is sort of like the foundation upon which all other gods and magics rest?”[/say] The Launceleyn’s voice came out tentatively, since he wasn’t really sure if he’d understood it at all. The other man’s comments about the difference between the magic of this world and his own were at least understandable. However, Loren wasn’t entirely sure he agreed with Abasi’s analysis. [say]”I’d like to think there’s magic in all those things here as well.”[/say] Well, maybe not the Pharaoh, but everything else the other man had described was far more impressive than anything the summoner could do.
The lesson on the gods was simpler, though a bit cryptic. [say]”Well then, I find myself repeating myself, because that sounds very impressive indeed.”[/say] Abasi’s confession that he preferred certain deities to other’s caused the corners of the Launceleyn’s lips to quirk up slightly. [say]”Oh? And which ones were those?”[/say] However, all these discussions of higher powers caused the summoner to reflect on his own experiences. [say]”We didn’t have any gods in my old world. And...I’ve only met one of the gods of Caido, really.”[/say] Loren’s voice came out reluctantly. While he didn’t really want to talk about his encounters with Frey, he knew he should provide the other man what information the Launceleyn had about the gods of Caido.
However, if Loren had thought he was reluctant to discuss Frey, he didn’t really know what reluctance was; Abasi’s continued insistence that the summoner was worth something or worthy of the other man’s regard was hard for the Launceleyn to accept. From someone Loren had used to know, it might be understandable. From a complete stranger, it was surprising and uncomfortable. He flushed slightly at all the compliments. [say]”Well. Thanks. I’m glad you like me. But you don’t really know me that well.”[/say] When the discussion swung back to his appearance, Loren’s blush deepened. [say]”So you think there’s room for improvement, then?”[/say] He knew Abasi would just push back again, so the summoner sighed. [say]”Too self-deprecating, I know. Though if you do have suggestions, I’m all ears.”[/say] This was a surreal conversation, and the Launceleyn took a sip of his tea to cover his embarrassment.
RE: playing house - Abasi - 10-07-2019
[say]"Yes. Exactly. Without Heka there would be nothing - they say he was there at the beginning of all things."[/say] Abasi had occasionally had the task of explaining the roles of the Gods to children who came to the temples with their parents, and while he had never been skilled with them he had always loved telling the stories.
As for his favourite of the Gods...still a little ashamed, he thought for a moment then answered: [say]"I always enjoyed my prayers to Osiris. The God with power over life and death...It was always such an honour to call upon him."[/say] Loren spoke of a world with no Gods, which he could hardly imagine; who would be trusted to ensure a good year, to guide the people? Abasi imagined the man's homeland as absolute chaos.
It seemed Loren was determined to be down on himself. [say]"Well I think all the men here could do with some more effort in their fashions. No one wears kohl on their eyes or jewellery."[/say] He lifted his wrists, the gold bangles clanking against each other with the movement.
But if Loren wanted to stay as he was, Abasi wasn't going to fight him for too long - he had his own future to work out. [say]"Tell me...I've heard there is something coming called Longnight. Should I be concerned about it?"[/say]
RE: playing house - Loren - 10-08-2019
It seemed the Launceleyn’s guess was actually correct, or at least close enough that Abasi agreed with it. The only reaction that showed on the summoner’s face, though, was a slight quirk his lips it what might’ve been the shadow of a smile. [say]”Well. May you find heka here as well.”[/say] Maybe that was the wrong thing to say—and maybe it was impolite or rude to talk about the most important member of the other man’s pantheon that way—but Loren wanted to say something in response, and that sounded pretty good to him. However, at the end of Abasi’s comment, the Launceleyn tilted his head [say]”At the beginning of things? What came next, then?”[/say]
Seeing as the summoner had already explained his land didn’t have gods, it wasn’t surprising that the other man didn’t ask about Loren’s faith. That didn’t mean they couldn’t have a lively discussion of the gods, it just meant he personally wouldn’t be very useful or pious. [say]”Osiris sounds like an excellent and worthy deity to worship, especially with power over life and death. The gods of Caido seem to split those domains between them.”[/say] At least, that’s how it had been explained to the Launceleyn. He had no idea if it was true or not.
Smiling for real at Abasi’s observation about the less than flattering fashions of the Hollowed Grounds (the other man would get along great with Jiao, and also probably with Bastien), Loren plucked at his baggy and ugly sleeve with his free hand. [say]”What, this isn’t doing it for you?”[/say] Setting his mug aside, he rolled it up and then created a gold bangle to match the ones on the other man’s wrist. [say]”That better? If so, you’ve already made an improvement.”[/say] Then the summoner bit his lip, eyes flicking towards the door. [say]”I don’t know what kohl is. But I’m sure there are clothes in this Manor for me, if you think my wardrobe needs updating.”[/say] No doubt they’d stocked a room for him before his disappearance. However, he had no idea if they’d kept any of it, or what state they might be in if they were. And he wasn't sure he felt comfortable making any changes to what he normally wore. If he had help, though maybe he would actually do it.
Unfortunately, the glimmers of joy and the glimpses of the old Loren were snuffed out by the mention of LongNight. Apparently, he hadn’t done a great job warning the newcomers in the Manor they’d need to relocate soon. [say]”Yes. There's a week coming up at the end of Deepfrost when the sun and stars and moon all disappear, and monsters come out to hunt. They’re drawn to people, and light, and warmth, so we’re barricading some buildings and gathering there. I’ll be at the Temple, which will be safe, and you’re welcome to go either there or the Monster Hunter’s Guild.”[/say] Although he probably should’ve sugar coated it, he felt it was more important to give Abasi the unvarnished truth.
RE: playing house - Abasi - 10-08-2019
Abasi wasn't sure what to make of Loren's comment (Heka was simply the beginning of all, anything, so it went without saying he was in this place) but it seemed the man had good intentions, so he bit back any of the retorts that came to mind. At least Loren provided him with a good question to move onto, one he could answer in his sleep.
[say]"Well, the creation of the world was very complex and involved many of our Gods - each temple will tell you a different version. That does not mean they are wrong...the nature of the Gods is that humans must never know the whole truth. But usually, they speak of a chaotic time where the world was nothing but water."[/say] When he had spoken of this in his temple, he had had a basin before him, where he would move the water to the mood of the story, inject inks and flowers to represent parts; for now he just used his hands. [say]"Heka had an idea of how the world would be, and the Gods which resided in the water-world helped him to realise the physical manifestation of that world. Ra, the sun. Geb, the land. Each with their place. For a while we lived peacefully, Ra ruling over us."[/say]
With all this talk of the other Gods, Abasi merely nodded at Loren's praise of Osiris - scared that speaking their names could bring them here and they would see him showing such preference.
He smiled approvingly at Loren donning a golden bracelet like his own; back home he would have been offended to see someone of a lower position mimicking his jewellery, but now it only reminded him of the place he missed. [say]"That is an improvement. Do you not feel better, when you have adorned yourself? More confident? As for the kohl..."[/say] Abasi pointed to his own eye, then remembered he had not applied any in many weeks. [say]"Ah..it is a powder made from grinding minerals. Black. It can be worn on the eyelids and drawn into shapes."[/say] He traced a line going from the corner of his eye to his temple.
The news on Longnight did not so much frighten Abasi as make him feel incredibly tired. Did this place never rest, or was constant and intense misery just the new norm? [say]"I see. I suppose I shall join you in the temple you speak of, since I do not know where else to go - or indeed, who else to follow."[/say]