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+---- Thread: [se] this is bullshit (/showthread.php?tid=5959)
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[se] this is bullshit - Jack - 07-11-2021
Did you know that the shores of the Sallow Swamp eventually bleed away into the sea, and that occasionally, the shallower waters turn into mud flats? Jack knows. He also doesn't like it, especially at this time of the season. Because whilst this is, indeed, where he plans for them to disembark and for the smuggler to do some smugglin', there's a bit of a problem. Namely, the Ark is currently surrounded by bloodthirsty fucking pumpkins.
[say]"Are you kiddin' me,"[/say] Jack growls where he's leaning against the side of the ship, even as he watches a few gourds try to pile up on one another in the mud to make a sort of tower. One of the crew members leans out in the meantime from a cannon hole, smacking them away so they topple and splatter in the muck. [say]"This is stupid."[/say]
RE: [se] this is bullshit - Melita - 07-11-2021
Melita, based on what she could see from windows down below the decks, wisely left Fangorn in her designated space. Perhaps he heard the grumble of his comrades, though they often ignored his pleas to leave or vacate or just turn around, and that broke her heart too, in a way. The honeybee didn’t quite understand how or why they’d managed to assemble in such a barbaric force this season – when in others past, they’d contained themselves to the Grounds. Ordinarily, she wouldn’t even have to worry about her companion and being a witness to a brethren’s slaughter.
But she ambled up ladders and along the deck anyway, weapons bounding against her back, glance seeking out the little pile they were forming. Had they grown in wit and intelligence too? More often than not she’d seen them assembled in bizarre patterns and then just…kept coming. Like those fabled lemmings. [say]“Do you want me to shoot them?”[/say] She asked Jack – frowning slightly, the bow ready to be in her hands within a moment’s notice.
RE: [se] this is bullshit - Milo - 07-12-2021
Milo’s certainly heard the commotion, squinting over the rail of the Ark as the other crewmate reaches out from the cannon hole to smack them away. It sparks a thought in Milo as he stares at them, frowning with the sudden onslaught of pumpkins of all things, thirsty for blood and probably a leg or two to gnaw on. But Milo knows they won’t all let that happen.
He reaches for his magic, summoning a fruit bat the size of a house cat – one that doesn’t feel pain as he sends it careening into another tower of pumpkins, aiming to knock them over before they can latch onto the side of the Ark and try to climb their way up that too. “[say]Why’re they ev’rywhere this time?[/say]” Milo complains, brows furrowing as he guides his summoned creature.
RE: [se] this is bullshit - Locke - 07-15-2021
He thought about staying in the kitchen and pretending not to hear the chaos but honestly, he's too curious. He takes one last swig of booze before stepping up on the deck, making his way over to the others. [say]"Maybe they're hungry."[/say] It's pretty clear they're hungry but that's never stopped him. He leans against the edge of the boat, peering down the side. [say]"What do you think they taste like?"[/say] Another thing he's entirely too curious about for his own good.
Locke turns to look at Jack, head tilted just so. [say]"I've got a shift, can probably draw them away and get back in time for you to get her out to water."[/say] And maybe he wants to slap some around. It's not that big of a deal, right? Smacking some vampire gourds around. Maybe he'll get left behind too. That doesn't seem like such a bad idea.
RE: [se] this is bullshit - Jack - 07-15-2021
Jack scoffs, and if one looks closely, maybe he looks a bit proud of his crew and their bloodthirsty suggestions. [say]"Dunno,"[/say] he says to Milo, and then to Melita, [say]"I absolutely want you to shoot 'em."[/say] Stepping back and away from the side of the ship, he grabs up a couple of harpoons (they've not got much in the way of being able to shoot them, but they're good for stabbing) and offers one to Milo.
[say]"Catch a few an' we'll find out,"[/say] he calls to Locke. [say]"Do whatever you like - I reckon we're stuck here until the tide comes back in, so you might as well find some way to pass the time. Maybe we'll eat pumpkin tonight."[/say]
RE: [se] this is bullshit - Melita - 07-15-2021
It hurt her more than she’d like to admit; even after rounds of foolishness along the Leap of Faith, or in the past, because she hadn’t mauled them. Just…tossed them over the edge of waterfalls and assumed they were still floating along the lake somewhere.
She steadied her bow, drawing it along the length of her arm, in a quiet, sullen sigh that didn’t go any further than her chest. [say]“You can make lots of things with pumpkin,”[/say] she uttered, emotions bordering on something she couldn’t quite name. Though there wasn’t an oven for baking on the ship. Maybe soup. Maybe reaches of other things she didn’t want to recall either.
She took hold of an ice arrow, lodged it along the strands, took aim, and fired without another thought; striving to harden, to compress, to contort. Maybe it would simply freeze them, and they’d be done for the day.
RE: [se] this is bullshit - Locke - 07-15-2021
The honeybee doesn't seem so keen and he feels kind of bad, under the everything else. He doesn't know Melita well but she clearly cares about Fangorn and these are his kin, as bitey as they are. He pulls himself up and over the railing, gripping the sides to look up at her. [say]"Not real keen on experimenting right now. Maybe if we can find some proper pumpkins. Can't imagine these taste all that good, yeah?"[/say] He gives her his best wink before turning and jumping down. Luckily, it's jaguar paws that hit the mud and not human feet. It hurts a little but nothing he can't handle. The mud, however, is annoying.
[say]C'mon you little shits. Away from the big boat. Pussy tastes better anyway.[/say] His intent is to draw them away and he's sure they can't hear his goading by why not try. He had kind of wanted to smack some around but he's feeling a touch soft today. For now.
RE: [se] this is bullshit - Milo - 07-16-2021
He’s so focused on sending his summoned bat careening into the leaning towers of pumpkins that he nearly jumps when Jack suddenly hands him a harpoon – hands immediately scrambling for it as the bat loses a bit of its focus before Milo’s picking it back up – giving it a solid command and doing his best to keep it going while they work to wreck the nasty gourds (sorry Fangorn).
“[say]Would kill fer a good punkin pie.[/say]” Milo tacks onto Melita’s thought, aiming the harpoon to one of the larger, snarling gourds down below – trying his best to avoid Locke in the assault. The harpoon is aimed, then fired, headed straight for one that’s latched a vine onto the side of a pumpkin’s head prepared to climb up it.
RE: [se] this is bullshit - Jack - 07-17-2021
The pumpkins can't hear Locke's thoughts, but Jack certainly can, and it's a good thing that he's already laughing at Milo fumbling with the harpoon, because heh, that was a good one. Approaching the side of the ship again, he lances down with the harpoons to pierce through a good stack of the gourds trying to climb up and onto the deck, flinging them away where they splatter and break on the mud before.
Melita's arrows are just as effective, and though it's a close call for Milo, he does succeed in striking down the pumpkin he's aimed for. A lot of the others are now hissing and squelching and playing follow the leader with Locke. [say]"Could roast the seeds, or make pumpkin soup,"[/say] he adds with a shrug. [say]"I ain't a chef, I don't fuckin' know."[/say]
Speaking of, their chef is fucking off into the Feverlands with a bunch of new gourd children. [say]"An' what's your plan now?"[/say] Jack hollers to him.
RE: [se] this is bullshit - Milo - 07-18-2021
“[say]Soups good.[/say]” Milo mumbles as he fucking struggles between focusing on his summoned creature to keep it up as well as the harpoon. With a huff, he manages to shoot the gourd he’s aimed at, though not without a struggle, and when he looks back up to search for that bat he’d summoned? Yeah, that’s gone too. There’s a quiet little ‘goddamnit’ that leaves him under his breath before he’s shaking his head and able to pour all of his focus into the harpoon this time.
He watches while he aims as many of the gourds go to follow Locke and Milo decides to try and pick off the ones that have decided to remain, whistling at the sight of Jack’s destruction. “[say]Oy, nice one Cap’n![/say]” He’s really impressed to be honest, feeling quite a bit more like he’s pretty useless in comparison. Still, though, he tries. He aims for another gourd, hoping that without having that summoned bat that he might be able to actually not struggle this time.
RE: [se] this is bullshit - Melita - 07-19-2021
Her heart wasn’t into it; and one wouldn’t need to read minds to see it. Written plainly on her face, in the frowns, in the half-hearted hold of her bow, in the way she didn’t reach for another arrow. A stretch of something hurt, and it flickered around her chest.
Melita’s eyes rested on Locke though, parading around, and she shook her head. If they had another method to lure them away from the ship, rather than following people, because eventually, their chef would need to escape. [say]“If we have some meat, we might be able to lure them away,”[/say] she offered, uncertain if Jack would be willing to give up a portion of the precious food, or if she’d be sent off hunting with those notions and ideas.
RE: [se] this is bullshit - Locke - 07-20-2021
Does Jack seriously think Locke does anything with a plan? Because he doesn't. Especially this. He's just gonna do what feels right, or something. He's a big fuck off cat right now, he ain't scared of no pumpkins even if they got fangs. [say]Can swim you know. And climb.[/say] Not that he thinks Jack can hear him but still. Will he scale the Ark? Why not? A few claw marks never hurt nothing.
Plus, he's only gotta dodge a few harpoons. He can even bring them back to the ship once they're done. Maybe. He smacks a gourd that's gotten to close away, careful to keep his claws sheathed. The smack is hard enough to send it flying and hopefully it gets the hint. Who knows. Locke tries to get up a tree, intent on just.. jumping over them to get back down. He is no snow leopard but still.
RE: [se] this is bullshit - Jack - 07-20-2021
One of his crew suggests spending valuable rations on the gourds. Another thinks - doesn't say it, but it doesn't matter - about leaving claw marks in the side of his ship. (And mark Jack's words, if Locke tries, he'll stab him with a fucking harpoon, see if he doesn't). Then there's Milo, who receives a pointed finger in his direction. [say]"That's the kind of positivity this ship's been lackin',"[/say] he informs the rest of them, using the butt of the harpoon to jab another pumpkin away from the ship.
The gourds, at least, seem to be leaving the Ark alone for now, intent on crowding the tree that Locke has climbed. And hey, at least they're not bothering the ship any more, and Jack is kind of tempted to just let the situation develop from here. He's got a feeling, though, that the rest of the crew won't feel the same.
[say]"Fine,"[/say] he grumbles to Melita. [say]"Grab some meat, distract 'em enough for the stupid cat to get down."[/say]
RE: [se] this is bullshit - Melita - 07-20-2021
The ensuing grumble nearly made her eyes roll, but she ambled off towards their storage anyway, without another word. At least this might save some of the gourds from another fate, and to get Locke down from the tree.
Returning with only small proportions, since she didn’t want to waste anything (with some solid, silent promise of hunting later to ensure the supplies never became too low), the youth flickered over the side of the ship, and towards where they had collectively gathered around the trunk of a tree.
[say]“Here,”[/say] and she waved the portions of meat near her, angling her steps distinctly away from them in a waving tease – not forgetting how she’d procured Fangorn in the first place, intending for them to follow her.
Then, she could heave the food into grass and muck, presuming they’d be content with the free endeavors, and give Locke time to escape.