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[SE] it has to be so lonely to be the only one who's holy - Sohalia - 04-12-2023
The Oerwoud had been mostly kind to Sohalia thus far, but her recent encounter with a Ceffyl Dŵr had left her a bit warier than she'd ever been before. As she walked amongst the trees and vines of the jungle, she kept a watchful eye on the woods around her, determined not to be taken so by surprise a second time. Perhaps, once she had traveled back to civilization, it would be time to begin some self-defense classes. She didn't love the concept, being a peaceful sort of woman, but it seemed to her now that if she was going to wander alone, she might as well make sure she could take care of herself!
She paused near a stream that cut a swath through the jungle, eyeing the water warily. It didn't seem like the type of place for a Ceffyl Dŵr to make its home - she could imagine them more easily back at the Mistbanks, where there was open water and room to successfully
Still, it wasn't like Sohalia to remain glum for long, and as she settled herself by the water's edge for a drink from its clear waters, she found herself effortlessly cheering. It was a beautiful Flowerbirth day, and she was going to make the most of it.
Looking around, she recognized a particular bush: a blushberry bush, a smallish plant with bright blue flowers and bright yellow berries. She grinned, wondering what it would be like to eat the berries. She wasn't normally a particularly shy person, but she knew that consuming the berries would turn her into one. She hesitated for but a moment before reaching into the plant, plucking a yellow berry from its stem, and popping it into her mouth.
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Blushberry Bush (common): A smallish bush with bright blue flowers and clusters of bright yellow, edible berries. When eaten, a chemical in the berries causes cheeks to blush and obvious bashfulness in behaviour.
RE: [SE] it has to be so lonely to be the only one who's holy - Jude - 04-16-2023
With age and strength in his limbs these days, Jude is rarely ever found in Torchline anymore. He knows it bothers his father greatly, just as his second aging had, but he finds solace in the quiet of the jungle as opposed to Torchline's hustle and bustle. Of course he ensures he returns home frequently to soothe Harper's worries, but he lingers as long as he can in these lush and blooming woods. His mother had taught him all the plants and herbs she could get her hands on in his youth and there is little that Jude fears unintentionally encountering or imbibing. Which makes it all the more ironic that he steps over a trail of vines crossing the path (always light-footed and hard to hear approaching after a childhood among the Fae) to find a stranger plucking berries from what is undeniably a blushberry bush.
[say]"Ah, miss -"[/say] he tries to intercede, wincing slightly when it comes too late. His fingers fold into his palm, uncertain. Should he leave her in privacy to her impending bashfulness? Or linger, to explain if she was confused? [say]"Did you...mean to eat that?"[/say] His voice is quiet, but with an undeniably sweet and nonjudgmental tone as he lingers awkwardly on the path a few feet from her.
RE: [SE] it has to be so lonely to be the only one who's holy - Sohalia - 04-16-2023
In retrospect, perhaps eating the blushberry hadn't been the brightest plan. After all, if Soh had learned nothing else in her travels, it was that she was rarely alone for long. It seemed that everywhere she went, she made a new friend.
Why should today be any different?
And yet, here she was, with the blushberry in her mouth, when a boy not much younger than her appeared from the trees. It was far too late to stop her from eating it, and she wasn't rude enough to even consider spitting it out, so she swallowed quickly and started to offer her trademark bright smile - but something stopped her.
She hadn't been prepared for how quickly the berry would take effect, and so it was that she flushed a deep scarlet, dropped eye contact, and clenched her hands in her skirts. [say]"I - I,"[/say] she stammered, and was immediately annoyed. She'd never found it so difficult to get a simply one-word answer out before! [say]"Y-yes."[/say] There. Now, that wasn't so hard, was it?
RE: [SE] it has to be so lonely to be the only one who's holy - Jude - 04-17-2023
Something between sympathy and amusement colors his handsome young face as the war on her own is swiftly lost, followed by a swallow. Admittedly, though a rather shy person by nature, Jude can't help but feel a little hopeful flutter in his chest at having found someone his own age that wasn't his older brother. It prompts him to come a little closer, hoping it won't worsen the immediate fluster she finds herself contending with.
[say]"It's okay, it'll pass soon,"[/say] he comforts instinctively, trying to make up for the clear difficulty she's having with speech by filling the empty air with his own. [say]"Um, I'm Jude. Can you tell me your name?"[/say] Doe eyes peer through the curly brown fringe at his brow, finding it novel to have to look down at her. Most of his family is taller aside from his Maman, so he hopes he isn't coming off as intimidating. (Completely unaware that as a rather spindly, puppy-eyed creature, he likely isn't even capable of it if he tried)
RE: [SE] it has to be so lonely to be the only one who's holy - Sohalia - 04-17-2023
Under normal circumstances, Sohalia would have been overjoyed to have found someone her age. The only people she'd met since leaving home, it seemed, were older than her. There was nothing wrong with that, of course - after all, age was just a number, and she seemed to get along with her new friends just fine - but it was a bit tiring to always be one step behind her older friends. They just had so much life experience, and she... well, she didn't.
But these weren't normal circumstances. She'd eaten from the blushberry bush, and, true to its name, she was now beet red and impossibly shy.
The stranger came a little closer, and Soh swallowed hard, shifting nervously from one foot to the other. He seemed to know more about the plant than she did, and he reassured her that it would pass soon. How soon? she longed to ask, but her mouth stayed tightly shut, her gaze firmly on the forest floor. Every now and then, her grey eyes would flick up to his face, but whenever their eyes met, she blushed even more and quickly looked anywhere but at him.
Gods, but this was embarrassing! Rather than being intimidated, Soh was touched by his kindness. It would have been all too easy for someone to poke fun at her in this situation, or give her a hard time. She wanted to return to her usual bubbly self, but it was far too late for that now. After a few moments working up her courage, she managed to offer her name in a small, shy voice that was foreign to her ears. [say]"S-Soh."[/say]
RE: [SE] it has to be so lonely to be the only one who's holy - Jude - 04-17-2023
Quiet as a mouse, Jude observes her from the few steps they now have between them. He's not so sheltered as to be enamored by a pretty girl merely for existing, but she is rather pretty. All the more so because of her current blushing state, even if it makes his own cheeks color to see how she cannot keep eye contact with him. It's not because he's handsome or any sort of charming, but the mind concocts what it desires, and the fluster is easily spread even without aid of magical berries.
He just barely bites back the 'so what?' that immediately pops to the tip of his tongue. There's just a hint of a breathy h-sound at the end that implies a name, or a shorthand of one. [say]"Nice to meet you Soh. Um...would it help if I ate one too?"[/say] His voice ekes up at the end, uncertain if it would be helpful to have someone sharing in her embarrassing state. One hand rises to pull at this curls, a shy laugh escaping. [say]"Or, uh, maybe not. We wouldn't get any words out at all."[/say] Which would be a whole new level of hilarious, but not exactly conducive to socializing. [say]"Here - do you have water? I have a flask, it'll help shorten the effects."[/say] It takes a bit of fumbling, but Jude manages to unclasp his water pouch from the cross-body string it's on, scooting a little closer to hold it out to her.
RE: [SE] it has to be so lonely to be the only one who's holy - Sohalia - 04-18-2023
At the boy's suggestion, Soh breathed a laugh that immediately set her cheeks to flaming. It would be interesting, if he ate one too, but she wasn't sure that it would be particularly helpful. As he noted, then they'd probably just sit in increasingly awkward silence, unable to make eye contact and unwilling to make conversation. No, it was probably better this way, even if it meant that Soh was ready to die of embarrassment, even without the blushberry.
She brightened a little at the mention of water and glanced up, meeting Jude's gaze for half a second before fixating on the proffered flask. Forcing herself to reach out and take it, though, was another matter entirely. She hesitantly lifted a hand, slowly reached forward - gods, why did it feel as though everything was happening in slow motion?! - and tentatively took hold of the flask. There now. That wasn't so bad.
Then her fingers brushed his.
She swallowed a yelp of surprise and snatched her hand back, fumbling with the flask as she withdrew. The result was predictable: the flask fell to the forest floor, where it lay forlornly amidst the leaves. Soh, meanwhile, was now a shade of red that was nearing purple. She was unused to physical contact as it was, and the addition of the blushberry just made her shyness in that regard all the worse.
Flushed, trembling, and more embarrassed than ever, Soh snatched up the flask and took a healthy gulp of water, and was relieved when she felt the effects of the berry begin to fade. Thanking all the gods that she'd elected to eat only one, she offered Jude a small smile and held his flask back out to him. [say]"T-thank you,"[/say] she said, her voice still a bit trembly. It would take a little longer for the berry's effects to fully dissipate, but at least she might be able to hold some semblance of a conversation now.
RE: [SE] it has to be so lonely to be the only one who's holy - Jude - 04-19-2023
Even flustered, her laugh is far more enticing than the mortified squeaks and groans of embarrassment he has heard from her yet. Taking it as a positive sign, Jude tries for an encouraging smile as he holds the water out to her. Whatever progress had been made immediately dissipates the second her fingers touch his own - which is ironic, because Jude jolts the exact same way, and he doesn't even have a berry to blame it on. Cheeks darkening in tandem, Jude yanks his hand back to his chest automatically, fisted against his sternum. They both stand there, red-faced and staring at the water flask on the ground, and Jude hysterically considers how stupid they must look to any outsiders. Like Jude is the type of boy to faint if Soh were to show her ankle in the next few seconds.
As Soh bends down to grab the flask in a hurried motion, Jude turns his eyes upwards to the branches and sky beyond, hoping to get his own head back to rights while also providing the girl some privacy to do the same. Only when she speaks does he carefully drop them back to her face, and while his cheeks are still pink his smile is still warm. [say]"You're welcome. Now imagine how strong eating a whole handful would have been!"[/say] He'd seen his classmates suffer that particular fate, and they'd been bashful for nearly thirty minutes. His poor teachers - who had warned them all ahead of time - had been particularly exasperated that day.
RE: [SE] it has to be so lonely to be the only one who's holy - Sohalia - 04-20-2023
Fortunately, the effects of the blushberry did seem to be fading, albeit slowly. She could at least stand to look at Jude now, which seemed to be progress in the right direction. She still stuttered when she talked, though, as she found out when she tried to speak next. [say]"A h-handful would've been a-awful,"[/say] she admitted, making a face. [say]"I t-think I would've d-died of embarrassment."[/say] She took another sip of water, enjoying the sensation of the cool liquid sliding down her throat.
At least Jude had been kind. Now that she could, Soh looked him over shyly. He was taller than her and lanky, with warm brown eyes and dark, curly hair. There was a certain sweetness about him that set Soh at ease, tempering her excitement at having finally found someone around her own age to talk to. It had been ages since she'd been around anyone not in their mid-twenties, and while she loved her friends dearly, there was just something relaxing about being amongst one's peers.
[say]"I was j-just curious what it would be like, to eat one of the b-berries,"[/say] she explained, her voice getting stronger as she talked. She cleared her throat and took another drink of water. [say]"But you know what they s-say - curiosity killed the cat!"[/say]
RE: [SE] it has to be so lonely to be the only one who's holy - Jude - 04-20-2023
Jude's smile is both relieved and a little amused, though not at her expense. [say]"I wonder if you can really die from embarrassment? It sounds like a really awful way to go."[/say] His mother is a healer, so he knows all the various odd ways a person could get sick or perish, but embarrassment would probably be the worst in his mind. He already feels rather shy and socially anxious, to feel that at the max level in your last moments? Eugh.
Still, she's not the only one relieved to be in the company of someone similarly aged. Aside from his big brother, Jude doesn't have...well...any friends, much less any his age. Trying not to linger on how sad that sounds now that he thinks about it, Jude instead meets Sohalia's gaze for the first time, and a shy little smile perches on his lips. [say]"But satisfaction brought it back, right? And it's not so bad when it's just the butterflies as it fades."[/say] Because of course Jude has eaten them before, that's why he knows how to mute their effects. With nothing to do with his hands and unwilling to ask for his flask back just to give himself something to do and rob her of its benefits, Jude lifts one hand to hold the opposite elbow in the hopes he won't end up fidgeting. [say]"Are you...from around here?"[/say] A small thread of hope winds through the question, praying she is so that he could have a potential friend nearby.
RE: [SE] it has to be so lonely to be the only one who's holy - Sohalia - 04-20-2023
Sohalia laughed, a bright and infectious sound that was finally free of the blasted blushberries. It had been an... interesting experience, she'd give it that, but that was the last time she tried something new while she was "alone" in the woods! [say]"Oh, but it would be terrible, wouldn't it? Can you imagine?"[/say] She shuddered. Of all the ways she could think of to die - which, admittedly, was not many - embarrassment had to be the worst.
But now she was feeling much better, and decidedly less shy, and she squealed excitedly when Jude finished the saying. [say]"I didn't think anyone knew the rest of that saying!"[/say] she laughed. [say]"My guardian used to tell me they thought I'd made it up!"[/say] She sobered suddenly as memories of Auden bubbled to the surface. It still seemed strange, to talk of Auden in the past tense. So often, it seemed as though they could pop out from anywhere, and it would be just like the old days.
She shook her head to clear away the cobwebs of old memories. [say]"I'm originally from the Hollowed Grounds,"[/say] she explained. [say]"But when my guardian died,"[/say] her breath caught ever-so-slightly on the word, [say]"I left. I spent all of Deepfrost and most of Flowerbirth up 'till now in the Greatwood, but I've been wandering the past few weeks, just exploring."[/say]
RE: [SE] it has to be so lonely to be the only one who's holy - Jude - 04-21-2023
Her laughter is like a summer breeze, misplaced in these woods and their current springtime era, but welcome all the same. Jude's smile becomes a little more sure, his own tiny, quiet chuckle hiding beneath hers like a shadow. If he had any input on such imaginings, they're lost beneath her sudden excitement - and immediate plunge into territory Jude can tell is painful and unanticipated, spoken without thought. But if Jude is ever capable of overcoming his anxiety, it is for the comfort of others, and he smiles to try and distract her. [say]"My dad says it all the time, but he says a lot of things that aren't normal in Caido. Probably because he's an Outlander. Was your mentor?"[/say] A gentle probe, hoping to find a middle-ground topic that wouldn't feel so overwhelmingly filled with grief.
[say]"I'm really sorry, that sounds...really, really hard,"[/say] he murmurs, and wishes he were more of the hugging type with anyone outside of his family. [say]"Have you um...talked to anyone about it? It can hurt more to just bottle it all up."[/say] Jude isn't arrogant enough to presume he is a good option, but he takes a deep, shaking breath and tries to offer a bit of companionship in her hurt to even the scales of vulnerability. [say]"My maman has been gone for three seasons now. We know she's alive but she just...won't come home. It's hard not knowing if she's hurt, or if she just didn't want to be around us anymore. Talking about it is hard, I get it."[/say] It's not exactly eloquent, but as he tucks his curls behind his ear and shrugs helplessly, he hopes it helps in some small way.
RE: [SE] it has to be so lonely to be the only one who's holy - Sohalia - 04-24-2023
Soh swallowed hard at the memories of Auden threatening to overwhelm her. Grief was funny like that. Only a moment before, she'd been fine - better than fine, even. Happy, excited, warm. But then it was like someone had poured ice down her spine. [say]"Auden was native to Caido,"[/say] she said. [say]"But I think they had a lot of Outlander friends."[/say] She grew quiet as Jude talked, listening with compassion in her eyes. She wanted to reach out to touch his hand in solidarity, but she was too shy; instead, she said, [say]"I'm so sorry. I can't imagine that anyone wouldn't want to be around you, but I do hope she's not hurt."[/say] She blushed a little as she said it, knowing that it was a silly thing to say to a near-perfect stranger. But Jude had been so kind to her, and seemed like such a genuine young man - how could anyone meet him and not want to sit with him a while longer?
[say]"I... suppose I haven't really talked about it,"[/say] she admitted. Only a little, with Tal, and that had been more to relay stories than to really talk about Auden and their death. [say]"It's just - hard. I lost my parents when I was very young, so Auden was... well, they were really the only parent I remember. They were grumpy sometimes, but I knew they loved me anyway. It hasn't even been a year since they died. It was... some kind of illness. Nobody could really figure out what it was or how to stop it."[/say] She took a deep, shuddering breath. [say]"All I could do was my best to take care of them, until..."[/say] She looked away, hiding tears welling up in her eyes, swallowing the lump that had appeared in her throat.
RE: [SE] it has to be so lonely to be the only one who's holy - Jude - 04-25-2023
It's true that she dims like a sunset gone by too fast, and Jude feels as if it's entirely his fault. But he can see her hurting, and he thinks if he can just reach her...well, nobody had ever tried to make him talk about his own abandonment, and the ocean holds his secrets as it does everyone else's, but it doesn't make up for the ache of thoughts with nowhere to go but circles in his own head. Maybe he can fix that for her.
He turns a little pink at her involuntary compliment, and she does the same though he can't figure why. [say]"Thanks. It's just hard not knowing...easy to blame yourself, right?"[/say] And maybe that's just a guess, but Edmund has felt much the same recently. Jude thinks maybe that's the hardest weight kids have to carry, wondering what they could have done so wrong to make the people around them leave.
It's worse to know her parents had been lost even before her mentor and adoptive parent, and Jude - empathetic, soft-hearted boy he is - can't help how his chest tightens with grief on her behalf. So as her eyes well up and she looks away, he tries to muster up as much bravery as he can to reach for her hand to hold it gently. [say]"I'm sorry Soh,"[/say] he murmurs, his own eyes a little damp. [say]"I'm sure you did your best, and they probably knew that too. They taught you everything, right? Like a parent. So they must've known it wasn't your fault."[/say] Because he can see it in her like a terrible mirror, this idea that hangs around their necks, whispering horrible things in ears that no longer have a loving voice to soothe those worries away. [say]"It's okay to be sad. Sometimes we fight it too hard, but my dad says it only makes it worse to keep it in."[/say] Harper had ensured that Jude always felt comfortable being able to cry, to express his emotions, and the way Sohalia tries to hide her own tears makes him think maybe she needs to hear it too.