Interesting. Very interesting. [say]"So you took a post no one wanted for reasons you do not know? That is very brave."[/say] she said. [say]"Or foolish. They are often the same."[/say] Of course, Delphia meant no insult by her words. They were pure observations without filters.
And the girl grew only more intriguing. Her brows furrowed. [say]"No one to advise you on the gods? You must be very close with them then."[/say] she said. At least she thought that would be the only reason a leader wouldn't have missed that, would they?
But she seemed pleased enough with her response to the flowers. The corners of her eyes crinkled as though with smile. [say]"I see. It is good to find time for rest."[/say]
Brave or foolish? [say]"Do you know, I've often thought the same,"[/say] Soh agreed with a laugh, preferring to diffuse any tension with humor rather than dwelling too closely on the meaning of Delphia's words. Besides, it was true. Her decision to lead had been brave, she supposed, but it had also been foolish. She had no idea what she was doing or how to do it, and she often felt like an imposter standing in shoes she couldn't possibly hope to fill.
[say]"I wouldn't say that,"[/say] she said, shifting uncomfortably at the mention of the gods. [say]"I mean, I'm familiar with the gods, of course, and I'm working with Frey and Safrin on various quests, but I don't think I have any special knowledge."[/say] Perhaps this was an area she had overlooked, though Stormbreak was so well known for its religion that she hardly thought the people needed guidance from her on the matter.
Delphia's eyes squinted with a smile then. [say]"It is a good thing to be aware of in one's self."[/say] she said.So few were so self aware, so despite her youth this Sohalia had a leg up on many people. Perhaps she ought not be so critical. She seemed more competent than she would have assumed a girl her age to be.
But she was disappointed in the next answer. [say]"Every leader needs a relationship with the gods, or close counsel of one who is. They make our world after all."[/say] she said solemnly. Maybe Stormbreak wasn't as blessed a place as it had once been if one so inexperienced with the gods was now leading.
Maybe she was inexperienced, and maybe she was incompetent, but she was the only one who'd been willing to do the job. Perhaps Delphia was making the assumption that there was any other option, but there hadn't been. Soh was it, and she was unaccustomed to disappointing her populace or her guests (whichever the demigoddess was). She was doing the best she could, and she was rapidly losing control of the situation in which she found herself. How was she to defend herself against someone so blunt?
[say]"I understand,"[/say] she said, striving to be agreeable. [say]"I certainly aim to learn as much as I can about the gods, and to develop relationships with them. I respect them greatly."[/say] Hence why she was decorating the temple - in an effort to bring some brightness and life into the place dedicated to the gods.
[say]"I would advise you grow close with all the gods. They have blessed this place greatly after all."[/say] she said. Not that she was an advisor or in a position to advise, but it seemed logical.
Her mind was quickly distracted though.
She looked up at the statue of Mort again. As she did, her forefinger ran circles on the pad of her thumb. Then slowly she smiled. [say]"You look like your mother. Your parents are very proud of you."[/say] she said without hesitation, voice confident. Her eyes seemed to be looking beyond the statue. Rather like a cat staring at an empty corner. She was seeing something that Sohalia clearly could not.
[say]"Thank you,"[/say] Soh said politely, happy to take advice and adding 'meet the gods' to her ever-growing mental list of things to do. To be honest, it had been on her list anyway, but she supposed that moving it to a higher priority wouldn't hurt. With Stormbreak being a particularly pious city, perhaps Delphia had a point - she should be familiar with the gods to lead such a people.
She was drawn from her reverie by a startling revelation. "You look like your mother," said Delphia, and Soh stared at her, taken aback by the seemingly random statement from someone who had, in all likelihood, never met her mother. Emotions, tumultuous and wild, threatened to overtake her as she waited, heart in her throat, for some kind of explanation for such a strange statement. Did she really look like her mother? Were her parents really proud of her? She hoped so - she tried to be the kind of person she thought they'd have wished for her to be - but she'd always questioned whether or not her efforts were sufficient to earn their praise.
[say]"I beg your pardon?"[/say] she asked weakly, gazing at Delphia as the demigoddess stared off into a corner.
This now, Sohalia's reaction, was familiar to Delphia. The unsure questioning of the words she said based on what she could see beyond the grave. She had been told it was unsettling, but Delphia was convinced it was comforting. Why else would she have such a gift from Mort if not to comfort those who still lived?
[say]"You look like your mother and your parents are proud of you."[/say] Delphia repeated. She turned her head to look at the girl again. [say]"I am the daughter of Mort. I can see into and converse with the spirits in his realm. Your parents wished me to convey that message to you."[/say] she said. [say]"Is there anything you wish to ask them?"[/say]
Sohalia had never dreamed that she'd be able to speak with her parents, not until she herself had entered Mort's realm, and so Delphia's answer left her momentarily speechless. Tears welled up in her eyes, and she turned her attention to rearranging one of the vases she'd set out, focusing on fussing over the flowers until she had mastered her emotions once more. When she was sure of her hold on her tumultuous feelings, she turned back to Delphia with a pained smile.
[say]"I... wish to tell them that I love them, and that I miss them, and that I wish we'd had more time together."[/say] She paused, thoughtful, and then, suddenly, everything began to pour out. [say]"I wish I could converse with them. I - there's so much I want to know. I could use so much advice. Am I doing the right things as Stormbreak's Heart? Was becoming a leader the right thing to do? Have I messed things up beyond repair with Jude? How do I fix relationships when I was the one who caused the problem?"[/say] She began to tear up again. [say]"Sorry,"[/say] she said, her voice thick with unshed tears. [say]"I... It's a lot, but I just... I don't know how to do this on my own."[/say]
Delphia was used to emotion being displayed in grand amounts when she conversed with the dead. It was a skill only she and a few gods had after all. But she hadn't expected the girl to spiral and begin spewing concerns and insecurities that Mort's daughter had no context for. Like who was this "Jude" for example. The name slipped off her tongue as though she ought to know, but it was merely met with a solemn blink.
Was this girl truly cut out for leadership?
At her last utterance, Delphia's head tilted, an amused smile curving her lips just slightly. [say]"You are very silly."[/say] she said, hands hanging heavy at her side. [say]"You are never alone. The gods are with you always. They are eternal and surround us all all the time. They know all and are but an offering away at the shrines. Lay the weight of your woes upon their shoulders and they will guide you."[/say] she said. [say]"Such has always been the way of Stormbreak's people to rely on the gods."[/say]
As Delphia regarded her solemnly, Soh began to feel very silly indeed. Here she was, laying all of her problems at a stranger's feet, as though expecting the demigoddess to have all the answers. She withdrew quickly, schooling her face to disguise her sudden burst of emotion. It was a poor mask, but it was an attempt nonetheless, and perhaps Delphia wouldn't comment on the girl's inability to hide her emotions well.
[say]"Of course,"[/say] she murmured, a faint blush mantling her cheeks at Delphia's commentary. Though she didn't think the demigoddess had meant it as such, it felt like a gentle rebuke. She hadn't much experience with them as a child, except for becoming Attuned - and even that had been so early in her life that she hardly remembered a time when she wasn't. As an adult, her time spent around the gods was still fairly limited, though as a leader she was sure that she would converse with them more than most. It just seemed silly to burden them with her personal problems. Those were hers, and hers alone. [say]"Forgive me. I'm not from Stormbreak originally, you see. I'm still getting used to relying on the gods."[/say]
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