Maea
And I hope that you don't suffer
But take the pain
But take the pain
Ah, but she saw it. Thought she did, at least. Perhaps clearer than he did, at any rate, because though he dressed this in pretty words... wasn't he repeating the same pattern yet again? Leaving himself free to come and go as he pleased, only it would be back and forth to the same person, this time? To her.
She saw the distance he created, the space he offered, and wanted to scream, because that space wasn't really for her, it was once again for him. What he needed, what he seemed t crave. Oh, they'd plunged deep into raging waters and let themselves be dragged along, and now...? Had they come too far, too fast? Was she driving him away, the more she tried to hold on?
Not unlikely. And that terrified her. And like always, it made her reach for him. A trembling hand twitching to touch him, close that space, seeking some small measure of comfort. Some steadiness in a world changing too fast.
"Will... will it really be a break though, if we keep meeting every other week?" Maea hated the question, what it might imply, but knew she had to ask. "Please don't take this the wrong way, you know what I would prefer, I want to have you there, but... won't it be just the same thing, all over again? Coming and going... won't it just hurt more? Will it change anything?"
Would he ever figure out if he needed that bandaid, unless he ripped it off? Let it sting and burn and hurt, and see if it kept bleeding... or if he somehow had healed enough to move on?
The only problem was... what it might mean for her. But... still. Wasn't it also painful to have him come and go, like she was some kind of revolving door?
But she'd said she would wait for him. That she would do anything for him. And she did mean it.
And she hoped her eyes could convey it as she tried to catch his gaze, because her words sure didn't do the trick todya.
She saw the distance he created, the space he offered, and wanted to scream, because that space wasn't really for her, it was once again for him. What he needed, what he seemed t crave. Oh, they'd plunged deep into raging waters and let themselves be dragged along, and now...? Had they come too far, too fast? Was she driving him away, the more she tried to hold on?
Not unlikely. And that terrified her. And like always, it made her reach for him. A trembling hand twitching to touch him, close that space, seeking some small measure of comfort. Some steadiness in a world changing too fast.
"Will... will it really be a break though, if we keep meeting every other week?" Maea hated the question, what it might imply, but knew she had to ask. "Please don't take this the wrong way, you know what I would prefer, I want to have you there, but... won't it be just the same thing, all over again? Coming and going... won't it just hurt more? Will it change anything?"
Would he ever figure out if he needed that bandaid, unless he ripped it off? Let it sting and burn and hurt, and see if it kept bleeding... or if he somehow had healed enough to move on?
The only problem was... what it might mean for her. But... still. Wasn't it also painful to have him come and go, like she was some kind of revolving door?
But she'd said she would wait for him. That she would do anything for him. And she did mean it.
And she hoped her eyes could convey it as she tried to catch his gaze, because her words sure didn't do the trick todya.
Hope if everybody runs
You choose to stay
You choose to stay
