Maea
And I hope that you don't suffer
But take the pain
But take the pain
She listened, like he listened to her. With full attention, leaving everything else aside to hear, to see and try to understand. And the thing is? The thing is... he's right. And she hates it. Hates hearing it, because she knows it's true. Maea was setting herself up for disappointment. For heartbreak, when she built a house on a man. When she gave him everything, without checking to see if he wanted it.
And yet, these were all fears. And he'd helped her conquer some of those in the past, right?
She brought her arms up, to hug herself, since he wouldn't. And the tears burned behind her eyes, but she bit them back, chewed them up and swallowed them down so that she wouldn't ruin this completely. Not more than she already had.
"The thing is? I've changed so much this past season," she said, hoarsely. "Everything that was old is gone. Everything I knew is different. And so... I have this feeling. That I want to try and change myself too. Face my fears. Become stronger. Someone that won't break."
Breathing deeply helped. It steadied her, helped her see clearer. Looking away from him, out over the setting sun, Maea found that... it wasn't as painful as she'd thought. The colors were different from last time. The shape of the clouds not the same. The ocean lay still as a mirror this evening, with not a wave to be seen. The ocean never remained the same... so why should she?
"Would it be okay?" she asked, turning back to him. "If I tried to change a little more, just like you? So maybe I won't have to lean so hard on you... and... and maybe I'll become better at trusting.
"Maybe you won't let me down, and maybe... maybe it won't be so bad to let go as I think now.
"I don't know... But, I'd like to try."
If he still wanted to. If she hadn't said too much, offered too much truth.
And yet, these were all fears. And he'd helped her conquer some of those in the past, right?
She brought her arms up, to hug herself, since he wouldn't. And the tears burned behind her eyes, but she bit them back, chewed them up and swallowed them down so that she wouldn't ruin this completely. Not more than she already had.
"The thing is? I've changed so much this past season," she said, hoarsely. "Everything that was old is gone. Everything I knew is different. And so... I have this feeling. That I want to try and change myself too. Face my fears. Become stronger. Someone that won't break."
Breathing deeply helped. It steadied her, helped her see clearer. Looking away from him, out over the setting sun, Maea found that... it wasn't as painful as she'd thought. The colors were different from last time. The shape of the clouds not the same. The ocean lay still as a mirror this evening, with not a wave to be seen. The ocean never remained the same... so why should she?
"Would it be okay?" she asked, turning back to him. "If I tried to change a little more, just like you? So maybe I won't have to lean so hard on you... and... and maybe I'll become better at trusting.
"Maybe you won't let me down, and maybe... maybe it won't be so bad to let go as I think now.
"I don't know... But, I'd like to try."
If he still wanted to. If she hadn't said too much, offered too much truth.
Hope if everybody runs
You choose to stay
You choose to stay
