when the world turns upside down, you should blame it on me
She sinks, whimpers, closes him out and he has to look away from her. But he still listens, knowing that it’s the result that would either happen now, or the questions that would filter around her mind when she’s back in Halo. If he was laying awake at night wondering whether or not he should tell her it had been a mistake, if he should crawl back to her after realizing that he could see a future with her.
As it stands right now? He can’t. He can hardly see a future for himself, let alone someone else – someone else who had built this season of her life upon him, only to be disappointed in the end like they always were. But for her to take the blame? To ask why it had come to this? Oh, they both know. They know it’s him, and not for the lack of her love.
Perhaps for the lack of his.
“It’s not you, Maea.” It’s a weak confession. “It would have happened eventually. You know that. I know that.” His words are almost flat, as if he’s trying to keep that mask on, shoving his hands into his pockets to keep from clenching them into fists at his idiocy. “And who knows? Maybe someone will catch your eye for a night.” A clench of his jaw as much as he hates that idea too, but knows that it’s only fair if he does the same.
“It’s one sided either way. Because that’s what I do. I get things for the Advocates by flirting and sometimes more. I got Nate to join by being the cause of his failed relationship. I flirted with Weaver the entire time I got her to join. Hotaru joined right when Lusea disappeared and gave me a distraction, an out with no expectations if she walked right through that door again.” More and more honesty. “I don’t care about the rest that I’ve been with because they don’t matter to me in the end. Not like you do, not like how all of this has mattered to me. And it has, it really has.” He lets his gaze land on her again.
“But if you’re there and I have to do something like that to extend the Advocates? You’d hate it all the same.” Perhaps that’s where the problem lies. “And I don’t want to break those rules for you in order to do that. So it’s best for me to not have them if I'm trying to grow the Guild and doing whatever I can to ensure it survives. Lucas would have wanted that. Adam would have wanted that. And now it's mine to work on when every season we seem to lose more members than we gain.”
As it stands right now? He can’t. He can hardly see a future for himself, let alone someone else – someone else who had built this season of her life upon him, only to be disappointed in the end like they always were. But for her to take the blame? To ask why it had come to this? Oh, they both know. They know it’s him, and not for the lack of her love.
Perhaps for the lack of his.
“It’s not you, Maea.” It’s a weak confession. “It would have happened eventually. You know that. I know that.” His words are almost flat, as if he’s trying to keep that mask on, shoving his hands into his pockets to keep from clenching them into fists at his idiocy. “And who knows? Maybe someone will catch your eye for a night.” A clench of his jaw as much as he hates that idea too, but knows that it’s only fair if he does the same.
“It’s one sided either way. Because that’s what I do. I get things for the Advocates by flirting and sometimes more. I got Nate to join by being the cause of his failed relationship. I flirted with Weaver the entire time I got her to join. Hotaru joined right when Lusea disappeared and gave me a distraction, an out with no expectations if she walked right through that door again.” More and more honesty. “I don’t care about the rest that I’ve been with because they don’t matter to me in the end. Not like you do, not like how all of this has mattered to me. And it has, it really has.” He lets his gaze land on her again.
“But if you’re there and I have to do something like that to extend the Advocates? You’d hate it all the same.” Perhaps that’s where the problem lies. “And I don’t want to break those rules for you in order to do that. So it’s best for me to not have them if I'm trying to grow the Guild and doing whatever I can to ensure it survives. Lucas would have wanted that. Adam would have wanted that. And now it's mine to work on when every season we seem to lose more members than we gain.”
sunjata
Feel free to use magic/force on Sunjata, without killing him <3
Sunjata speaks with an Australian accent and has a passive magic that makes him produce a subtle scent that matches exactly to whatever those around him most desire him to smell like.
