From being an Abandoned who had rarely left the Hollowed Grounds, to embracing the call of adventure, to dying and being reborn first as an Ascended and then as an Ancient, Maea has gone through quite the amount of changes in her life. One thing remains common, though, in her attempts to find out just where she belongs; she’s always had a craving for knowledge which has brought her to so many places and to meet so many people here in Caido. We can’t wait to see what else is in store for her!
Congratulations, Maea!
Credits
Court of the Fallen was created in October of 2018 by Odd, Honey, and Crooked.
Skinning and hosting by the epically talented Kaons, and functionality fanciness by the coding magic of Neowulf. If you ever see either of them around, make sure to show them some love!
And round about his home the glory That blushed and bloomed,
Korbin tensed at the embrace, half pulled away. He wasn't one for touch, normally, and typically Weaver was the only one he exempted from that rule. But then he felt the tremors run through the other, and even in the midst of his own shock, he recognized the needs of another. Put them over his own, and remained where he was. Let himself be held... because maybe that's what Loren needed.
With his eyes closed, he could almost pretend it was Erebor. His brother had been bigger, stronger... or maybe that's just how Korbin remembered him, having been smaller himself when the brother died. Didn't matter, he was gone now. But if he'd been here... would he have have been this shook up over killing someone? Would he have thrown up, cried, been a trembling wreck? Honestly... he didn't know.
At some point, when the wind-filled quiet had dragged on for too long, Korbin realized that his mental shield had fallen. He didn't cry, and his emotions were tightly withheld from the body, but... it was all laid bare, in the attuned bond. Soul deep grief that never healed like a pit of darkness. Steely resolve to protect what was left of his family, rejecting anything and everyone that might cause pain or harm. Fear... so much fear, that it was a miracle he managed to drag himself out of bed each morning. And his shame was there too; the softness in him, the gentle kindness that recoiled from killing, from hurting anyone. That would rather tend to and care for animals and people than hurt them. Hunt them. Do what had to be done to survive...
There was a half-hearted attempt to bring the shield up again, to withdraw from Loren. Awkward embarrassment creeping like tension into his shoulders... He really hated letting people in, and like this it felt like being caught with his pants down.
Is but a dim-remembered story Of the old time entombed.
Although Loren was dealing with his own shock, when he finally felt Korbin's mental walls disappear the healer did his best to keep his own feelings to himself. Instead, he just tried to radiate a warm comfort, to combat the fear and sadness in the hunter. It was difficult to maintain, but thankfully the Launceleyn had a great deal of experience compartmentalizing. At the same time, he supplemented his mental efforts with a burst of invisible healing magic, trying to ease some of the strain on the other man's mind.
When Korbin half-heartedly tried to pull away, Loren just tightened his hold. Once, he might've felt ashamed to in this position. Now, though, he just hugged the hunter to the healer's chest. Unbeknownst to him, a soothing hum had sprung to his lips, and he was rocking gently.
And round about his home the glory That blushed and bloomed,
Korbin couldn't remember when last he'd felt so much like a child. Broken and lost and unable to cope. Sometime before his mom had disappeared, maybe. Or before he'd seen his dad die in his bed, an ugly, slow death as far from the honorable hunter's death as he'd wanted. Maybe the last time he'd cried was when he sat vigil over Weaver as she lay injured and dying, praying and fearing that every breath would be her last. He couldn't recall, couldn't say...
He didn't cry now. Perhaps it would have been better if he did. But when his attempt to pull away resulted in him being held tighter, he sighed and gave in to it. The embrace, the healing he didn't feel except as a soothing warmth washing over his senses, the simple closeness to another living being he so resented. He didn't cry, but... something within him softened. Lost the worst of its edge, like a wild cat slowly letting down the raised hackles, pulling claws back in.
Still a bit awkward, one of his arms came up, to wrap around Loren's back. Offering some small acknowledgement to his presence. "I'm fine," he tried to say, hoarse and too quiet, though it really wasn't true. Just... it felt like something he should say. For lack of anything better.
Is but a dim-remembered story Of the old time entombed.
When Korbin finally spoke, and relaxed a bit both physically and mentally, Loren couldn't help but breathe a bit of small sigh of relief. "Well I'm not." It came out with just the faintest edge of hysteria, but mostly his tone was wry. Still, he took a deep and calming breath.
Then he released the hunter from the healer's embrace. "But we probably shouldn't stay here." Reaching up, he quickly wiped away the traces of the tears that had spilled. That done, he stood up. Focusing for just a moment on the ice wall he'd raised, it slowly crumbled, leaving the way out clear once again. The snow had picked up a bit, but it would hopefully still be possible to travel.
And round about his home the glory That blushed and bloomed,
That earned him a closer scrutiny than Korbin had given him so far, in any encounter up until now. Disregarding the tears, he took in the man's appearance, looking for... he didn't know what. Outwards signs of something being amiss. But really, he didn't know this person, and couldn't tell if it was true.
"I'm... sorry. For letting you see that." It came rather grudgingly, but was sincere none the less. Loren was a healer, he remembered. Probably seeing people get killed was the opposite of what he wanted.
Korbin made no move to stand however, and after one brief look outside, he shook his head and leaned it back against the cave wall. "Don't bother. Not in this weather. You'd be lost after a hundred yards. You think it's windy here now, you should see the Tundra. Better ride it out in shelter and hope it blows over quickly."
It was a long trek over open terrain between here and the Citadel, and their shifts wouldn't be able to fly over the clouds. At least his couldn't. He had tried once, and almost died when he ran out of air and began to lose consciousness in mid flight. He'd never dared tell Weaver about that little mishap...
Is but a dim-remembered story Of the old time entombed.
It was true enough, even if Loren had a tight lid on his emotions. He'd fall apart later. As Korbin apologized, the healer immediately shook his head. "No need to apologize. Why are you sorry?" His confusion was genuine as well.
As the hunter called out, the Launceleyn sighed. Still, he nodded and raised the wall again, providing them some shelter from the elements. "Guess you're stuck with me. Again. Sorry that I seem to be making a habit of that." Settling in to a cross legged position, he gave the other man a quick once over. "Are you cold?" There was a gentle concern in Loren's voice.
And round about his home the glory That blushed and bloomed,
Why, indeed? Korbin followed Loren with his eyes as the man walled the entrance back up with magic, mulling over the question. "Because... healers are supposed to save people, right? Not kill them. Yet I did just that, and where you had to see." It seemed like a conflict of interest, one Korbin didn't wish upon anyone.
As Loren sat down, with yet another apology, the dark-haired youth raised a brow at him. "Indeed you are. I was starting to wonder about that... you're not following me, are you?" There was a lilt to his voice that suggested it might be a joke, but also a touch of suspicion to his glance... It better be coincidence. Or at least some good reason.
"Nope. Not yet. You should be though... You got that same magic as Weaver then? To keep you warm." He'd always been willing to trade his shift for his sister's magic - almost, though flying was second nature to him - and he had to admit, that was one trick he really wouldn't mind learning.
Is but a dim-remembered story Of the old time entombed.
Blinking in surprise at Korbin's response, Loren actually barked out a laugh. "If that's the case I'm apparently a shitty healer." He fell silent, expression softer and sadder. "You can't save everyone. And some people are beyond saving." Sighing, he rubbed his palms against his thighs. "And as I said, you saved more lives. So if me being a healer is your concern, rest assured I am not upset." Indeed, he sent a pulse of understanding to the hunter.
Despite the situation, the healer's lips twitched with amusement. "What if I said yes?" Shaking his head a little he forced his hands to still. "No. Halo's population is small, that's all." It came out reassuringly.
Nodding, he raised one hand, looking at it curiously. "I guess that must be it. I didn't really question it." Lowering his hand, he gave the other man another visual examination. "I can probably do something if you get cold."
And round about his home the glory That blushed and bloomed,
It didn't really fit together in his mind, but Korbin was in no mood to argue. He did touch his arm though, the one he'd broken, and was again surprised to find that it was back to normal. "I don't know about shitty," he mumbled. "Maybe you've got reason to talk like you did..." Referring to their first conversation, where Loren had sounded more than confident in his ability to fill the role as Healer.
The half tease was met with a flat stare, perhaps a touch uncomfortable. Joke or not... Korbin did not like the idea of being followed. Not for any reason. "I'd say you've got too much free time on your hands," he retorted. "Unless you actually enjoy being treated like shit. Then I'd be worried for real." Which was a real possibility... and an acknowledgement that the young man knew he was being less than civil.
Under the scrutiny, he shifted a bit uncomfortably. Shook his head again. "No need." He didn't need anything, nor did he want more help. He was in debt as it was, and none too happy about it.
Is but a dim-remembered story Of the old time entombed.
As Korbin spoke, Loren just shrugged. "Bravado and insecurity mostly. Plus a need to prove myself to the people of Halo." It came out quietly, but with the sort of stupidly earnest sincerity that he couldn't hide as much as he might want to.
When the hunter didn't respond in kind, even the faint glimmer of amusement left the healer. "I have experienced far worse, trust me." His voice was quiet.
However, his eyes narrowed as the other man mentioned there was no need for more help. "Don't be stubborn. If you get too cold it will make more work for me than just warming you up a bit." The Launceleyn tried to speak in as reasonable a tone as he could manage.
And round about his home the glory That blushed and bloomed,
The raven boy let him speak to finish, then gave Loren a steady look. Pursed his lips, as if contemplating just keeping his thoughts to himself. But that really wasn't his way, now was it.
"Respect - and trust - is something that is earned, healer. You won't get either if you pretend to be someone you're not. Nor by treating people with silk gloves and stepping around their feelings. No one in Halo has time for that kind of game. If you want something, just come out and say it. Either people agree and help you, or they let you know why the idea sucks."
Case in point, he removed his gloves and pried open a button at the neck. Long fingers pushed aside the scarf, and showed off the layer upon layer of clothing he worse. Wool, leather and more wool was providing ample insulation against the frigid temperature. "I'm not being difficult. I say I'm not in need of help because I'm not cold. If that changes, I'll let you know." He had no intention of freezing to death, but didn't require coddling either.
"What I'm saying is, what are you trying to prove?" Sealing his clothes back up and pulling the glove back on, Korbin regarded the other man. He was older than the raven, by a few years at least, but sometimes the things he said sounded really naive.
Is but a dim-remembered story Of the old time entombed.
Listening to Korbin speak about respect, Loren just nodded when the hunter revealed exactly how many layers he was wearing. The healer remained silent until the other man finished talking. Then the Launceleyn sighed, and ran a hand through his hair. "I just want to help people." It came out softly, and more than a bit embarrassed.
Shrugging, he rubbed his hands together nervously. "Most of my life, I've felt like a waste of space. So I just...all I want to prove is that I'm not." Shaking his head a little, he shifted position so he was seated with his back against the wall, legs stretched out before him. "Which I know is stupid, all things considered."
And round about his home the glory That blushed and bloomed,
There was a lot he wanted to say to that. Pretty words that ultimately would be empty and mean very little, coming from him. He didn't know Loren, nor did he particularly care - or so he would like to pretend - what the man did or said or felt. But something about what he said struck a chord with Korbin, hitting a little too close to home.
He shifted again, adjusting his seat until the rock at his back didn't poke his spine quite so uncomfortably. Hummed thoughtfully, as he threw a glance towards the air-vent by the opening; snow had begun to whip inside in small flurries as the wind picked up. He'd been right about the storm getting worse... Not that he was pleased about it.
"I get that feeling," he mumbled. "Question is, who are you trying to prove it to. Us common folk? Your brother, and the rest of the ningos up at the Palace? Or yourself?"
Not like he had an answer to any of it, Korbin was asking himself those same questions daily.
Is but a dim-remembered story Of the old time entombed.
Shrugging, Loren drummed his fingers in a nervous beat against his thigh. "Myself, mostly. And the people of Halo." He smiled more than a bit sadly. "I gave up long ago on impressing those Ningos in the Palace." Still, his tone, as well as the emotions bleeding through to Korbin, indicated that the healer wasn't strictly telling the truth.
"On the note of proving myself to the people of Halo, enough about me." He turned his head to regard the hunter. "I know we didn't get off on the right foot, and that you don't want me here. But...is there anything I can help you with?" The Launceleyn let out a huff of laughter. "Even if it's just to make you more comfortable with my presence here."
