LOREN
Loren swayed at the news that Remi’s feelings had been taken away. Granted, it aligned with his suspicions and some rumors and snippets of conversation he’d gotten from others, but it was another thing entirely to hear it spoken as fact. ”Y-you were there?” He desperately wants to ask her for details, while at the same time wanting to know nothing more, to remain in his blissful ignorance for just a few moments longer. But he was trying to be a better man, to take whatever chance this was and do more with it. That didn’t make it easy, though. At the mention of her ex-husband, Loren frowned. ”It was...is wrong.” The librarian just hadn’t been strong enough to do anything about it at the time. Maybe he was still too weak. It was funny that she’d served as a servant for a period of time, given his own experiences. ”I spent five years or so as a farmer, then a few months as a librarian, in disguise as a commoner all the while.” It had been part of some convoluted scheme on his father’s part, which had fallen apart when Cyton blew his cover. But during that time it had certainly given the summoner a different view of the world. ”Of course, I hardly had the most pampered upbringing before that.” He regretted the words as soon as they left his lips. Honestly, he wasn’t sure why he kept telling people about his past: it couldn’t change or excuse the mistakes he’d made.
”You’re not guilty of anything. I was just making an observation.” He really didn’t want or mean to make her feel bad. Just because he was a prude who had numerous problems with relationships and sex didn’t mean he begrudged other their carnal desires. At the blue-eyed woman’s comment about hosting an orgy for Edy’s part Loren stammered out his response. ”I w-wasn’t actually saying w-we do t-that here.” He gulped to get control of his voice once more. Gods, he could imagine his much more confident and sexually active cousin’s ghost laughing at him as they spoke.
He shook his head at Rexanna’s suggestion. ”No, I’ll stay. It’s the right thing to do.” After all, the librarian didn’t know Ezra. Besides, it was a party for Edy, and poor as Loren was at being a member of his family, a Launceleyn should still be there. He’d get over his misgivings at being at a party celebrating Edy, or at least suffer in silence. At the mention of LongNight, though, he gives Rexanna a sharp glance. ”I know.” Thinking back, Loren realized the blue-eyed woman hadn’t actually been at the meeting Remi hosted. ”I stupidly offered the manor as a sanctuary from the weather and the monsters both.” He’d hoped—probably naively, given who he was and who his family was—that by opening the doors to their home that he could start repairing some of the damage Zariah had done and restoring some of the trust they’d broken.
A beggar's book
outworths
a noble's blood
