there's light at the edge of the darkness
Well, that threat was pretty clear, so Loren shut the fuck up, lest Frey drop him completely and not just let him hang in the air a little below the god, or smite him in some other horrible manner. Similarly, he remained silent when the deity admonished the summoner to read a book. And he stayed quiet for most of the divine being’s explanation about the nature of love and the world. Still, he couldn’t hold his tongue forever. ”Why do you say what you want doesn’t matter?” It was an echo of something the Launceleyn had said, many, many times. And he’d almost made himself believe it too.
Almost, but not quite. So he couldn’t believe that the god of love’s desires didn’t matter either. And if the deity actually felt that way, well, the remnants of Loren's heart reached out to the divine being, for what little they were worth.
As Frey outlined the three options before the summoner he responded without hesitation. ”Not distance. That’s not a choice.” At least it wasn’t something he’d choose willingly: even now, bereft as he was, he didn’t want to even consider what might happen if he lost his capacity for love, to care for others. Just because he was bad at it didn’t mean he wanted to get rid of it. And it sounded too similar to what his family members tended to become for him to ever be comfortable with it. Besides, he'd tried to put distance between himself and he'd failed horribly at it. Now that he paired those two thoughts, he realized how horribly he'd been acting and his breath caught in his throat.
As for time or sex, well, he might not survive LongNight and the closest he’d come to sex in over a year was when Frey had made him cum harder than he’d ever cum before, and he didn’t know if that counted. So those were better, but not great.
Almost, but not quite. So he couldn’t believe that the god of love’s desires didn’t matter either. And if the deity actually felt that way, well, the remnants of Loren's heart reached out to the divine being, for what little they were worth.
As Frey outlined the three options before the summoner he responded without hesitation. ”Not distance. That’s not a choice.” At least it wasn’t something he’d choose willingly: even now, bereft as he was, he didn’t want to even consider what might happen if he lost his capacity for love, to care for others. Just because he was bad at it didn’t mean he wanted to get rid of it. And it sounded too similar to what his family members tended to become for him to ever be comfortable with it. Besides, he'd tried to put distance between himself and he'd failed horribly at it. Now that he paired those two thoughts, he realized how horribly he'd been acting and his breath caught in his throat.
As for time or sex, well, he might not survive LongNight and the closest he’d come to sex in over a year was when Frey had made him cum harder than he’d ever cum before, and he didn’t know if that counted. So those were better, but not great.
loren
