i licked it so it's mine

james

smoking kills

Once upon a time there was a wee little lad called James Prince Sweet Bottoms the eleventy fifth, who grew up by the sea. This was one of those really lovely sorts of seas where cold wet shite didn't fall from the skies for a quarter of the fucking year. Fast forward to the present and that dear sweet prince currently finds himself wandering about the woods trying to steal hunt something suitable for dinner. Because everyone loves a brave and tough man James had waved off Ianto's offer of a coat, smiling charmingly at the fox who merely laughed in his face as he set out wearing his usual assortment of rags clothing. Today that was: a scarf worn as a skirt (very fashion forward and daring. They aren't rips darling, they're slits!), a bit of netting for a shirt, and a stretched-out sock that absolutely worked as a hat. Ianto had forced boots on his feet which was probably the only reason he was still alive. Luckily James had also found a dirty blanket in one of the trees and happily bundled himself up in that as he trundled along.

Singing a mixture of curses and random verses of a sea-shanty, the snake stomped his way through the snow absolutely determined not to return empty handed.

but so does love.