the words

SAMUEL i am the ocean, crawling madly at your moon. and with one wanton whoop — "I feel sometimes..." Sam paused and shifted uncomfortably, admitting this out loud for the first time: "That she is the loving parent I never had as a child." Since his Ascension he had made many mistakes, ones that would have had him beaten and shouted out of his childhood home. But The Voice? She comforted, accepted. Loved. "Oh." He felt rather stupid for not realising Remi had meant the fallen Fae; perhaps he had not wanted to remember. "I...yes. I have never killed anyone and I never want to. But...I don't know. Those are the things I struggle with sometimes. But its not like the Old God's plans never get anyone killed." His voice was not very confident. The question about Jigano only made him more squeamish, Sam screwing up his face in thought before giving an answer. "I don't know, really. He's meant to be asking the Old Gods if they would take an Ascended back, because I think he hopes I might leave The Voice. But...in last couple of weeks, I've realised I just can't do that." He sighed, looking to Remi with almost apologetic eyes. "He said he would respect my decision either way but...I'm sure it will still cause problems." As much as Sam loved Jigano he knew the man had a tendancy to believe his opinion was superior, often to the point of being patronising. He could not see his decision to remain with his Goddess going over smoothly, especially not with this newest development. "So..what is it you're meant to do to protect these portals..? Do you think anyone will try to hurt me?" — i melt into a sycophantic soup, & all that's left to do, is giggle, fawn, and swoon.