Trying My Best (OPEN)

Sam truly believed that The Voice did not intend to hurt anyone, not with her portals or anything else; people got hurt, but it was always accidental, necessary, a side effect. While he still did not care for it, it seemed nothing came peacefully from the histories he had read...though he did not know if that was enough justification to stamp down the guilt very much present within him. Still, there was no intention to harm in him. He hoped to use the portals to connect worlds, to help people....and yes, to gain his Goddess's favour. Jigano's questions drew a frown from him as he bent his mind to the new perspective. While he could argue the semantics (giving that his job was doing and theirs was guarding, it could be said to be rather clear who was stopping whom), there was a more obvious answer on his lips: "No. I would not attack you or Amalia. Because you'd both easily beat me in one strike, because I care about you, but more than that: Because I..I..." He sighed, shook his head. "I'm not that kind of person. I don't...relish violence or anything like that. I don't want people to get hurt. But what do I do? I've been given a task by a Goddess I wish to stay loyal to and my friends are against me doing it, to the extent it might lead to fights. You say you'll be my friend despite The Voice, but it's impossible, Jigano. I'm stuck between everyone." Sam worried at a corner of his shirt, staring into the corner of the room. "A year or so ago I would have just killed myself, honestly. Now I'm no longer in that place, but I don't know...where...I am." Samuel He took a step but then felt tired He said, I'll rest a little while But when he tried to walk again He wasn't a child