Yours is the light by which my spirit's born
you are my sun
A frown appears on Oliver's face and he shakes his head. Almost all of what Bastien says sounds accurate and alright. It's sound advice, completely, but then he completely misunderstands what he means. It's not that Oliver feels like Bastien could've died, or it kind of is, but that's not what haunts his nightmares. "It's not really my hesitation itself. It's what it caused... I keep seeing your hurt body. The way you had been torn up and you were leaking fluid and- and it wasn't my fault, I know that... but it's so horrifying. To know that those creatures are right outside... and I can't do a damn thing about it." Oliver deserved to have Bastien be frustrated with him. His hesitation, while called for, was also childish. He was immature and under a narcissistic belief that Bastien would remember his name when really, he had absolutely nothing special about him to cause the man to remember him. He's lucky that the many even allowed him into the guild today seeing as he's one of the worst people to arrive to Caido.
Those thoughts linger in his mind, but he tries to remain positive. To stay upbeat and hopeful. "Jigano gave me some jewlery... it's really beautiful and someday, I'll have a nice event to wear it to... for now I wear it at home. It makes me feel nice and attractive." It's kind of embarrassing, but Oliver mostly makes himself look nice for, well, himself. He's slowly started to give up on others thinking he's attractive because what's really the point. There isn't a reason to make others think he's hot, so he mostly does it because it brings him confidence and meaning.
Taping his foot on the ground, Oliver's eyes shifted away. "What do I do? I mean... gods, he's so fantastic and... and I was going to do something. We were going to hang out and spend time together and then Fiat Lux just ruined everything. And I don't want to lose my chance again... please, I need advice." The words went unspoken, but Bastien would hopefully understand what Oliver wanted to do. "He is just...gods I could go on and on. The first time he met...he just understood me. He was so nice and sweet and he was just able to read me... and it felt so good." The words were hard to say, but the way the man made him feel? Words could never describe it.
Biting down on his lip, Oliver's eyes looked down at his lap and he tapped his foot anxiously again. What if he found out about his issue and laughed at him? No...he was too kind to do that, but still. Was he really worthy of even trying? His eyes couldn't even find Bastien's, clearly embarrassed by how pitiful he was, incapable of even forming proper sentences or asking directly what he wanted.
Those thoughts linger in his mind, but he tries to remain positive. To stay upbeat and hopeful. "Jigano gave me some jewlery... it's really beautiful and someday, I'll have a nice event to wear it to... for now I wear it at home. It makes me feel nice and attractive." It's kind of embarrassing, but Oliver mostly makes himself look nice for, well, himself. He's slowly started to give up on others thinking he's attractive because what's really the point. There isn't a reason to make others think he's hot, so he mostly does it because it brings him confidence and meaning.
Taping his foot on the ground, Oliver's eyes shifted away. "What do I do? I mean... gods, he's so fantastic and... and I was going to do something. We were going to hang out and spend time together and then Fiat Lux just ruined everything. And I don't want to lose my chance again... please, I need advice." The words went unspoken, but Bastien would hopefully understand what Oliver wanted to do. "He is just...gods I could go on and on. The first time he met...he just understood me. He was so nice and sweet and he was just able to read me... and it felt so good." The words were hard to say, but the way the man made him feel? Words could never describe it.
Biting down on his lip, Oliver's eyes looked down at his lap and he tapped his foot anxiously again. What if he found out about his issue and laughed at him? No...he was too kind to do that, but still. Was he really worthy of even trying? His eyes couldn't even find Bastien's, clearly embarrassed by how pitiful he was, incapable of even forming proper sentences or asking directly what he wanted.
my moon
and all my stars
OLIVER
Base Code by Sky!
