He arched a brow at that statement, so patently false, but said nothing for the moment. He had often chided people on how the gods lived on different time scales, and Amalia's description of 'moments' made sense with that framework... but he had also seen how genuinely fond the star-eyed goddess was of the baker. A moment she might be, but still a much-beloved one.
That she wasn't happy now was painfully obvious, trapped by her own legs and her own frustration to a bed she refused to leave. Jigano nodded slowly, though, understanding how hard it was to be happy when he was constantly searching for validation he rarely found more than fleeting moments of. "Not useless," he protested softly. "And not failures, always, either. I remember Ludo's realm... your grandmother is proud of you. You found Safrin's library. You planted Vi's Roses. You gave a Tulmhainar her dying wish, and you built a new Shrine to a goddess that was blessed by her. You saved Jyoti and you gathered lost souls for Ludo. You haven't always succeeded... but you have made things better than they were before, at least a little bit. At least for some people. It might not matter to you right now, but it matters to those you helped. It matters to me, as one of them." For what little that counted for. He might be trying to pull down the pedestal but he wasn't going to forget the good that she'd done for him and for others in the process.
The question she turned back on him was met with thoughtful silence at first. He tilted his head to the side, meeting her gaze squarely. "I've thought of it," he admitted. "It's been tempting, the longer he's stayed away from everyone else, to just join him. Not... to hide, exactly, but to go away from it all for awhile." He stroked Isuma's foreleg idly, drawing strength from her quiet support. "And I think I could be happy with him like that, for awhile, yes. A few days, a few weeks, even... but... I'd worry. Worry about if anyone got hurt and I could have helped them. Worry about my friends forgetting me. Worry about if the Guild was getting along okay... The longer I was gone the more I would worry until there was no room left for happiness. I tried going away for awhile before, just to be sick and with my mate for awhile... and it solved nothing and caused so many more problems instead." He gave a slight shake of his head and a wry, painful smile. "I might withdraw from the world a ways for a time, but if you taught me one thing, it's that I can't hide from it completely."
That she wasn't happy now was painfully obvious, trapped by her own legs and her own frustration to a bed she refused to leave. Jigano nodded slowly, though, understanding how hard it was to be happy when he was constantly searching for validation he rarely found more than fleeting moments of. "Not useless," he protested softly. "And not failures, always, either. I remember Ludo's realm... your grandmother is proud of you. You found Safrin's library. You planted Vi's Roses. You gave a Tulmhainar her dying wish, and you built a new Shrine to a goddess that was blessed by her. You saved Jyoti and you gathered lost souls for Ludo. You haven't always succeeded... but you have made things better than they were before, at least a little bit. At least for some people. It might not matter to you right now, but it matters to those you helped. It matters to me, as one of them." For what little that counted for. He might be trying to pull down the pedestal but he wasn't going to forget the good that she'd done for him and for others in the process.
The question she turned back on him was met with thoughtful silence at first. He tilted his head to the side, meeting her gaze squarely. "I've thought of it," he admitted. "It's been tempting, the longer he's stayed away from everyone else, to just join him. Not... to hide, exactly, but to go away from it all for awhile." He stroked Isuma's foreleg idly, drawing strength from her quiet support. "And I think I could be happy with him like that, for awhile, yes. A few days, a few weeks, even... but... I'd worry. Worry about if anyone got hurt and I could have helped them. Worry about my friends forgetting me. Worry about if the Guild was getting along okay... The longer I was gone the more I would worry until there was no room left for happiness. I tried going away for awhile before, just to be sick and with my mate for awhile... and it solved nothing and caused so many more problems instead." He gave a slight shake of his head and a wry, painful smile. "I might withdraw from the world a ways for a time, but if you taught me one thing, it's that I can't hide from it completely."
