You're so cold
but you feel alive
He tried to soothe her, tried to offer comfort even with his hands tied back. Maea let go of the ropes, let them fall open and relinquished her telekinetic grasp on them; the game was losing its fun and she wanted to feel his arms around her. To know the truth of the words she couldn't quite bring herself to believe. He was fine, not even upset about it, didn't mind the scars - so many were littering his body already, what was a few more? - and yet, for all that he told her not to worry, Maea found that it only reinforced her sense that he didn't understand.
"What if the scars were on me?" she asked quietly, still hiding away against his neck. Burying her nose in the space where it met with the collarbone, where she could feel his scent the strongest. "Would you not worry about it? What could have happened, whether I would have made it home again.." Her fingers stroked his hair, found the feel of the curls under her touch calming, soothing; this was hitting deeper than she'd even realized, touching upon some of the darkest fears she still had not found a way to process.
"I keep having this dream," she said. "I'm coming home to the farm after being away, and there are no lights in the windows. There's snow on the ground but no sign of people moving around, and when I come to the front door, it's open. Broken, hanging off the hinges... I call out, but no one answers, and when I look down, there's blood on the threshold. Every night, ever since... " She swallowed. Ever since the LongNight when this had been what she'd actually found. An empty house, and no one to answer when she called.
"Only, lately it's the VlamVloed I see instead... The bar is empty, you aren't there, and the floor is covered in liquour and blood. Mostly blood..."
Maea shuddered, hating to recall even the memory of the visions. Haunted by the idea that it could all happen again, and this time? She wasn't sure she could get back on her feet again. Not without him.
"What if the scars were on me?" she asked quietly, still hiding away against his neck. Burying her nose in the space where it met with the collarbone, where she could feel his scent the strongest. "Would you not worry about it? What could have happened, whether I would have made it home again.." Her fingers stroked his hair, found the feel of the curls under her touch calming, soothing; this was hitting deeper than she'd even realized, touching upon some of the darkest fears she still had not found a way to process.
"I keep having this dream," she said. "I'm coming home to the farm after being away, and there are no lights in the windows. There's snow on the ground but no sign of people moving around, and when I come to the front door, it's open. Broken, hanging off the hinges... I call out, but no one answers, and when I look down, there's blood on the threshold. Every night, ever since... " She swallowed. Ever since the LongNight when this had been what she'd actually found. An empty house, and no one to answer when she called.
"Only, lately it's the VlamVloed I see instead... The bar is empty, you aren't there, and the floor is covered in liquour and blood. Mostly blood..."
Maea shuddered, hating to recall even the memory of the visions. Haunted by the idea that it could all happen again, and this time? She wasn't sure she could get back on her feet again. Not without him.
lay your hands on me
one last time
MAEA
