She stood, looking out over the crop fields, tall, nearly ready for harvesting, and glowing golden-edged in the setting sun. She felt like she was a ghost, peering back into time, and any second now, a past version of her would come storming out and up to one of the merchants' carts, demanding a good trade for their extra squash. She would see herself as that girl strong of spirit, sure of foot. That girl who knew her place in the world and was perfectly happy there.
The girl who was Accepted and not...
She still couldn't say the word. Not in her mind and not out loud, because that would make it too true. She used to be able to face painful realities, but that had all been when she'd been sure of herself. And now she was anything but.
Quanil had told her she was still herself. She was still Freina. The merchants would still quake when they saw her coming...
...but now for a whole new reason, she'd thought bitterly.
So now here she was. She'd already been to the farm, already explained to her parents and Kedran what had happened. She could still hear her mother sobbing as it became apparent how she'd been saved. Father had, somewhat haltingly, told her she was still their daughter. "But, you know how the neighbors will talk..."
Kedran, Vi bless him, had just been glad she was alive, but their parents had held him back from walking out any further with her than the front door. She didn't hug him, just bid him good-bye. And now she was looking back on her old life, waiting for... something. She wasn't sure what.
A sign of where to go from here? She'd been given some offers by the people with her sibling when they'd found her, but none appealed.
She'd been staying with Quanil at the VlamVloed, and apparently she wasn't welcome at home now. The home she'd always known, known would be hers one day, that she would raise a family in, that she would probably die in eventually.
Her life had made sense before all of this. She had a place and a purpose in the world, and it had ALL. MADE. SENSE.
She held her palm out and focused. No air puffed out. I wonder if it can tell I'm mad at it?
She sat down in the drying grass to stare. She was still kind of numb, still feeling cut off from the world she'd known.
The girl who was Accepted and not...
She still couldn't say the word. Not in her mind and not out loud, because that would make it too true. She used to be able to face painful realities, but that had all been when she'd been sure of herself. And now she was anything but.
Quanil had told her she was still herself. She was still Freina. The merchants would still quake when they saw her coming...
...but now for a whole new reason, she'd thought bitterly.
So now here she was. She'd already been to the farm, already explained to her parents and Kedran what had happened. She could still hear her mother sobbing as it became apparent how she'd been saved. Father had, somewhat haltingly, told her she was still their daughter. "But, you know how the neighbors will talk..."
Kedran, Vi bless him, had just been glad she was alive, but their parents had held him back from walking out any further with her than the front door. She didn't hug him, just bid him good-bye. And now she was looking back on her old life, waiting for... something. She wasn't sure what.
A sign of where to go from here? She'd been given some offers by the people with her sibling when they'd found her, but none appealed.
She'd been staying with Quanil at the VlamVloed, and apparently she wasn't welcome at home now. The home she'd always known, known would be hers one day, that she would raise a family in, that she would probably die in eventually.
Her life had made sense before all of this. She had a place and a purpose in the world, and it had ALL. MADE. SENSE.
She held her palm out and focused. No air puffed out. I wonder if it can tell I'm mad at it?
She sat down in the drying grass to stare. She was still kind of numb, still feeling cut off from the world she'd known.
