I know what it takes to move on; I know how it feels to lie
All I wanna do is trade this life for something new
All I wanna do is trade this life for something new
Nate feels the welling panic in Sunjata, the confusion and uncertainty, and he walls himself off against it. He has no idea what he should be called, no idea how much of a role he’d be allowed to play in Kamaria’s life. No idea if he even wants one. All at once though, he understands exactly how Hotaru had felt, understands why it had been enough for her to leave. There isn’t a place for him here, unless he makes it.
”I am Nnnnate!” He draws his own name out the same way she does, straightening again. There’s a whirlwind inside of him, the rage cooling, just a little bit, and giving way to a deep sorrow. For once, Nate doesn’t give a damn about hiding these feelings from his husband, doesn’t care about how these waves will crash into the other man. ”Its very nice to meet you.”
The words aren’t meant for him, but Nate hears them all the same. Reacts to them all the same. ”No.” An edge of panic straddles the word, makes it sharper than he really means. immediately, he winced, clenching his teeth to bring himself back in line. ”I’m not... not feeling well right now. I can’t touch you or,” his one eye flicks back up to Sunjata, sullen discomfort burning in his gaze, ”daddy right now.” It’s not exactly a lie, just a simpler truth.
”But,” Theres a rise in his voice, that smile returning to its bright default. ”I can make you breakfast. You must be hungry, huh?” He leans towards the kitchen, expecting Sunjata to follow when he makes that first step.
”I am Nnnnate!” He draws his own name out the same way she does, straightening again. There’s a whirlwind inside of him, the rage cooling, just a little bit, and giving way to a deep sorrow. For once, Nate doesn’t give a damn about hiding these feelings from his husband, doesn’t care about how these waves will crash into the other man. ”Its very nice to meet you.”
The words aren’t meant for him, but Nate hears them all the same. Reacts to them all the same. ”No.” An edge of panic straddles the word, makes it sharper than he really means. immediately, he winced, clenching his teeth to bring himself back in line. ”I’m not... not feeling well right now. I can’t touch you or,” his one eye flicks back up to Sunjata, sullen discomfort burning in his gaze, ”daddy right now.” It’s not exactly a lie, just a simpler truth.
”But,” Theres a rise in his voice, that smile returning to its bright default. ”I can make you breakfast. You must be hungry, huh?” He leans towards the kitchen, expecting Sunjata to follow when he makes that first step.
holding on to what I haven’t got
NATE
