HOTARU
He melts into her touch, and she is there with cupped hands to hold what overflows, cradling every drop so that nothing is forgotten. There is no real need for gentleness with a man who cannot feel the sensitivity with which she touches him, but it is there all the same. In contrast he holds her like a drowning man to a life ring, and Hotaru does nothing but move closer into his gravity to allow him to wrap himself around her. It's a moment of selfish greed. Even she can see that in herself. It doesn't stop her from laying her hands to his skin and letting the world around them fall away.
"It's not fair," she agrees softly, and though the base of her throat burns and aches, her words do not tremble the way they ought to. Shielding him even from this. Constructing a barrier between him and the rest of the world, and intentionally placing herself on the outside where her own emotions cannot touch him. For a moment, as his eyes fall somewhere short of her lips and his voice strains, tears cling to her lashes and her resolve nearly breaks. It's a near thing. An aching like the creak of wood before it snaps, leaving her gutted and hollow. Tinder all the same to keep him warm.
"You will hurt me," she confesses into his skin, her own tears warm where they streak down her cheeks, and she has never been so grateful that he cannot feel them on his own. "But I will forgive you for doing it all the same. Because I love you." Her voice breaks, shattering somewhere in those last few words, and she casts her gaze heavenwards in some last bid for strength. The strength to let him pull her into his embrace with the knowledge that letting go will be all the harder.
But she will do it for him, because she must. Because it's what he needs, what he asks of her in his shaking voice that she cannot hope to ever deny. Because she loves him, simply and truly.
"Kiss me then," she whispers, leaning close so he does not have to bear witness to how he breaks her. She focuses instead on the touch of his lips, the lukewarm coolness of his cheek beneath her hand, and the salt that only she can taste as her tears paint the spaces where they touch. It is a raw and painful communion, something beautiful but sharp like stained glass raining down on them. She kisses him like it is the first and last time. Like it's just another lingering moment stolen somewhere in their kitchen. Like it's the kiss she never got to have on their wedding day. A world of moments, lived and stolen, written into the press of her mouth against his.
She knows it still won't be enough to make him stay.
"It's not fair," she agrees softly, and though the base of her throat burns and aches, her words do not tremble the way they ought to. Shielding him even from this. Constructing a barrier between him and the rest of the world, and intentionally placing herself on the outside where her own emotions cannot touch him. For a moment, as his eyes fall somewhere short of her lips and his voice strains, tears cling to her lashes and her resolve nearly breaks. It's a near thing. An aching like the creak of wood before it snaps, leaving her gutted and hollow. Tinder all the same to keep him warm.
"You will hurt me," she confesses into his skin, her own tears warm where they streak down her cheeks, and she has never been so grateful that he cannot feel them on his own. "But I will forgive you for doing it all the same. Because I love you." Her voice breaks, shattering somewhere in those last few words, and she casts her gaze heavenwards in some last bid for strength. The strength to let him pull her into his embrace with the knowledge that letting go will be all the harder.
But she will do it for him, because she must. Because it's what he needs, what he asks of her in his shaking voice that she cannot hope to ever deny. Because she loves him, simply and truly.
"Kiss me then," she whispers, leaning close so he does not have to bear witness to how he breaks her. She focuses instead on the touch of his lips, the lukewarm coolness of his cheek beneath her hand, and the salt that only she can taste as her tears paint the spaces where they touch. It is a raw and painful communion, something beautiful but sharp like stained glass raining down on them. She kisses him like it is the first and last time. Like it's just another lingering moment stolen somewhere in their kitchen. Like it's the kiss she never got to have on their wedding day. A world of moments, lived and stolen, written into the press of her mouth against his.
She knows it still won't be enough to make him stay.
Pull you in, but don't you get too close
Love you now, but not tomorrow
Love you now, but not tomorrow
