when safe isn't

right now everything you want is wrong
& right now all your dreams are waking up

'Stop being so perfect.' Remi grumbles against Ronin's chest, ignoring the black water that coats his face as he buries himself relentlessly against the Star. Stretching a hand under Ronin's shirt if only to properly feel the warmth from his husband, the alchemist lets himself linger where he can both feel and hear Ronin's heartbeat. He lets it flood through him, pounding away his hate-filled thoughts until there's just a dull emptiness that's far easier to endure.

Pulling back, Remi reaches forward to brush away a smear of black from under the Star's eye. "Left in other worlds. Dead." He shrugs. "I did not ask. The world she came from was...it sounds as though her gods were as difficult as these ones are." It was no justification or explanation really, not that Remi had one to offer.

"I..bumped into Nate the other day." Literally. "I think...no, I know." Remi corrects the way he wants to downplay things, even as he speaks. "I was going to kill him. Right there in the street." With eyes soft and an expression that seemed utterly at odds with what he was saying for how gentle it was, Remi shakes his head. "I think...I still might."

The Lullaby