So tired trying to see from behind the red in my eyes
No better version of me I could pretend to be tonight
No better version of me I could pretend to be tonight
There's a moment where Koa thinks everything could change, the possibilities of their futures hanging delicately on a razor's edge. It's a moment of potential, of crystal facets and branching pathways, of their shared and synchronized breaths. In that moment Koa looks at Soh and sees the future they could have, a future he's dreamt of, just beyond his reach. A future he extends to her once more, the copper in his eyes pulsing in time his heart as once again he offers himself as a keeper of her heart.
And once again, she says no.
And here is where a stronger man might grant Sohalia grace.
Where a humble man might recognize that hesitation is not rejection.
Where a wiser man might realize that this moment is one of many, and to pin his hopes on a ship in a storm is a foolish thing indeed.
But Koa is not a stronger man. He is tired, and he is weak, and he is already worn thin.
Koa is not a humble man; he is proud, and he is stubborn, and he has already been wounded once before.
And Koa is not a wiser man. Hell, he's scarcely a man at all: moreso a boy playing at adulthood, hoping that if he postures at maturity long enough he will some day, in fact, be mature.
All of which is to say that Sohalia's non-answer is answer enough, at least for today. In his mind he has offered himself to her, and if she does not want him - if he still isn't enough for her - he is not going to beg. The light in his eyes dims alongside his smile as the young man drops his hand from her cheek, trying to keep the ache in his chest from blooming across his face.
"I'll make sure some Dragoons accompany you. And I'll go to Halo first, then Torchline." His shrug is easy, his tired voice mild as he takes a nonchalant step back, ready to turn and walk away. "Like I've always said - I love Stormbreak. Anything I can do to help keep this place safe, I will."
Because no matter how many times its Heart might break his, Stormbreak will always hold his soul.
And once again, she says no.
And here is where a stronger man might grant Sohalia grace.
Where a humble man might recognize that hesitation is not rejection.
Where a wiser man might realize that this moment is one of many, and to pin his hopes on a ship in a storm is a foolish thing indeed.
But Koa is not a stronger man. He is tired, and he is weak, and he is already worn thin.
Koa is not a humble man; he is proud, and he is stubborn, and he has already been wounded once before.
And Koa is not a wiser man. Hell, he's scarcely a man at all: moreso a boy playing at adulthood, hoping that if he postures at maturity long enough he will some day, in fact, be mature.
All of which is to say that Sohalia's non-answer is answer enough, at least for today. In his mind he has offered himself to her, and if she does not want him - if he still isn't enough for her - he is not going to beg. The light in his eyes dims alongside his smile as the young man drops his hand from her cheek, trying to keep the ache in his chest from blooming across his face.
"I'll make sure some Dragoons accompany you. And I'll go to Halo first, then Torchline." His shrug is easy, his tired voice mild as he takes a nonchalant step back, ready to turn and walk away. "Like I've always said - I love Stormbreak. Anything I can do to help keep this place safe, I will."
Because no matter how many times its Heart might break his, Stormbreak will always hold his soul.
Koa
No other version of me I would rather be tonight
And, Lord, she found me just in time
And, Lord, she found me just in time
