listen when there's no sound

Ashe Love the way your love keeps me up high, Cause in your hands i become a believer and i dont have to hide away my ugly side    Ashe huffed a laugh through her nose and flicked her eyes back down the book before her. ”Maybe we'll find cities out there,” she answered. ”Beyond that forest. Cities and libraries. Mountains and oceans, deserts and lush valleys..” Even as she read over Mort's name again, the name of Ludo following after with the explanation of it being his herald - a guide - she felt that intense desire to see the world out there with Kalt, to stretch their wings of freedom.    Once they had traveled all over the country, pretending for all the world that it wasn't under the order of their Master to kill whoever had been contracted. They would pretend there was no Guild to return to, no Master, no pain. She looked up at him as he adjusted how he sat - he was never able to sit still long - and she smiled slightly. They didn't need to pretend anymore.    She looked back down to the pages and leaned over the book, carefully moving through the chapters. There would be no peaceful or exciting or wonderful travels with Kalt and Theea until she did what she had to do. Not without Ronin's heart beating again. She weighed what little she knew as she read. Safrin had said Ludo kept the souls until they could join with Mort.. that he loved the souls he kept. Would it be Ludo that would lead her to the god of death? Would he come to her when she called? Was she just wasting time here with books when she could be at a shrine at right then?    As if picking up on her line of thought - or likely that's exactly what he did - Kalt’s words slipped in between her thoughts naturally.. and called her out. She paused her reading and frowned slightly up at him. He wasn't looking at her, but he would feel it no doubt. ”I'm not going to demand from the god of death.” But the words fell flat, even in their minds. She wasn't going to take no for an answer, couldn't. So.. demanding Ronin's soul back is ultimately what she was doing, wasn't it? She bit her lip and leaned her head against her hand as she looked back down to the book. ”I don't know what will happen” she admit, her thoughts quiet - a distant storm softly sighing on the horizon.    With that admission, something tried to worm its way into her heart: fear. Fear of what would happen, what would be asked of her. Safrin said there was precedence, that it wasn't done. That Mort did not bargain. But she suddenly saw a charming smile and gleaming blue eyes, heard his laugh so acutely she nearly felt in her chest. Then the smell of his blood, watching him ascend - then the look of agony and betrayal, the feeling of his weight sliding off of her sword. Ashe's brow creased as she inhaled sharply, her hand rising to rub over the new scar on her chest that suddenly fucking hurt.    ”I’m going to bring him back,” she thought to him stubbornly, and she turned silver-lined eyes up to Kalt. ”I have to,” she voiced aloud in a near whisper, almost pleadingly. cause i become such a beautiful creature in your eyes.