MAEA
It had sounded like excuses to Maea, but she was not here to argue over semantics. She had not come here to argue at all, and perhaps that was how she managed to bite her tongue and let Evie speak.
She flinched visibly at being seen as insignificant. That was the heart of the problem, wasn't it. Because of how true it was. Oh, she would have done anything for the girls who occasionally came to play with her, in the name of friendship. But if it had come to a point of action, what could she really accomplish? Her father har been loving, but strict. Not one to meddle in the affairs of others - though she wondered whether it would have been different if the extent of the Wordsworth's abuse against their daughter had been exposed. Her brother would certainly have tried to help - even now she trusted him like the had trusted nothing and no one else - but would it have been enough?
That was just it. No matter what she did, it was never enough.
Evie turned to face her. The apology at least felt sincere. Anger and pain kept burning in her chest, blazing from pale eyes... until finally something broke in her and tears welled up.
"All I ever wanted was to belong. With my family. With you guys. Be of some use..." Her voice wavered, Evie's pretty face distorting in her vision. "I'm sorry I didn't realize what was going on. I'm sorry I wasn't strong enough to stop it."
All the long years lay like cold offal between them. Sticky and revolting, painful to look at and harder still to accept. And there was nothing that could be done about it. She could rage about it and throw blame around and nurse her slights to the chest - and it didn't matter because no one but them were left who would know or care.
That's why it was so important that at least Evie acknowledged that it happened. If she didn't - she would be alone in her grief. Going crazy trying to make sense of something that never had been sane.
"Why did you write to me? I would have been fine with wishing you well and leaving it at that. I can't go to Halo. I would never have bothered you –" Would not in a million years have believed that this woman ever gave a damn about her being alive or dead, except maybe for appearances. Because it looked good to be the first to forgive.
Had that all been the result of the forced lies, too? Was she fooling herself here, thinking there was anything more to see in Evie?
"I'm really tired of cowering, you know. Of not being good enough for anything. Or anyone. And I don't care about pretending to be nice anymore, either. Do you really want to be friends? Because if this isn't going to be real, I'm fine with leaving it here. I accept your apology. That's good enough for me - "
Sniffling against the block in her nose, red eyed yet with a determined glint in the way she gazed at the red-haired woman, there was not a hint of shame over the tears in her. They had become a close companion over the past few seasons, as numbness faded and emotions reconnected alongside senses she had given up on ever regaining.
She flinched visibly at being seen as insignificant. That was the heart of the problem, wasn't it. Because of how true it was. Oh, she would have done anything for the girls who occasionally came to play with her, in the name of friendship. But if it had come to a point of action, what could she really accomplish? Her father har been loving, but strict. Not one to meddle in the affairs of others - though she wondered whether it would have been different if the extent of the Wordsworth's abuse against their daughter had been exposed. Her brother would certainly have tried to help - even now she trusted him like the had trusted nothing and no one else - but would it have been enough?
That was just it. No matter what she did, it was never enough.
Evie turned to face her. The apology at least felt sincere. Anger and pain kept burning in her chest, blazing from pale eyes... until finally something broke in her and tears welled up.
"All I ever wanted was to belong. With my family. With you guys. Be of some use..." Her voice wavered, Evie's pretty face distorting in her vision. "I'm sorry I didn't realize what was going on. I'm sorry I wasn't strong enough to stop it."
All the long years lay like cold offal between them. Sticky and revolting, painful to look at and harder still to accept. And there was nothing that could be done about it. She could rage about it and throw blame around and nurse her slights to the chest - and it didn't matter because no one but them were left who would know or care.
That's why it was so important that at least Evie acknowledged that it happened. If she didn't - she would be alone in her grief. Going crazy trying to make sense of something that never had been sane.
"Why did you write to me? I would have been fine with wishing you well and leaving it at that. I can't go to Halo. I would never have bothered you –" Would not in a million years have believed that this woman ever gave a damn about her being alive or dead, except maybe for appearances. Because it looked good to be the first to forgive.
Had that all been the result of the forced lies, too? Was she fooling herself here, thinking there was anything more to see in Evie?
"I'm really tired of cowering, you know. Of not being good enough for anything. Or anyone. And I don't care about pretending to be nice anymore, either. Do you really want to be friends? Because if this isn't going to be real, I'm fine with leaving it here. I accept your apology. That's good enough for me - "
Sniffling against the block in her nose, red eyed yet with a determined glint in the way she gazed at the red-haired woman, there was not a hint of shame over the tears in her. They had become a close companion over the past few seasons, as numbness faded and emotions reconnected alongside senses she had given up on ever regaining.
Light is easy to love
Show me your darkness
Show me your darkness
BASE INSPIRED BY ODD <3
