The World is Passing By

"Are you saying I'd need unbreakable ones?" Sam laughed, resting his chin on his hand and raising his eyebrows.

He took away his fingers after a moment, not even thinking about the contact. Once he had not been able to accept physical contact from anyone, but he was proud of himself for now being able to give small comforts.

Sam nodded as understanding and calm as he could as Remi spoke, though he hardly knew what the appropriate way to react was. "Oh...well, I'm sorry, Remi..." He mumbled, then took a bite of bread and chewed it before finally giving into temptation and asking "The person you have feelings for, is it.."

Me? Insisted something selfish and shameful in the back of his head, but Sam knew that wasn't logical. No, there was an obvious choice. "..Ronin?"

Samuel

I want you so badly

But you could be anyone

the higher i climb

"I am not saying that you don't." Remi quipped back with an easy smile.

Nodding gently, the corners of Remi's lips pulled up into what might otherwise have looked like a frown, if not for the sadness that reflected in his pale stare. He had cared for Ianto deeply. More than anyone else that he could remember, only...that was just the problem. The things he remembered was not all there was anymore.

If only Sam had suggested that it was him ... but he didn't. And so he would never now.

Remi's pale eyes snapped upwards, the outline of the bookmaker becoming ever-more visible as they continued to sit together. The smile that Remi had been forcing now warmed and grew sunny across his face, as he nodded slowly. "He..kissed me. I kissed him back, which is the important part I suppose." He added quickly, not wanting to make it sound as though Ronin had somehow done something untoward.

"Do you want to know a secret, Sam?"

the farther i fall when i do

Coding base by Sky!

Sam watched Remi's expression carefully but he didn't know what to make of it. Didn't know how to read people (he never had, not even when he knew them as well as Remi) and didn't want to assume anything when it came to the mans feelings. That had brought him into trouble before.

Upon hearing Ronin and Remi had kissed he raised his eyebrows, a little shot of pain going through his heart that he ignored. It was mostly a sort of fear of missing out, a sadness that he had no one to kiss; or at least he could tell himself that it had nothing to do with who Remi was. "Well. Then I suppose it went well."

Though, it did occur to him that he did not know the order of the story, and it was possible Remi had cheated...which did not sit well with him. But he couldn't find a good way to ask, and before he had Remi asked if he wanted to hear a secret.

"Yes. I promise I will keep it til the grave."

Samuel

I want you so badly

But you could be anyone

the higher i climb

"Well?" Remi ruffled a hand through his curls with a crooked smile. "I had come home unconscious, and then kicked him out of bed after he kissed me. So well might not be the word I would use." He added with a low chuckle.

Cheeks dimpling, Remi shook his head slightly. "You may not have to keep it that long. I..." Biting the inside of his lip, the alchemist looked wistfully away for a moment. It felt strange to be having this conversation with Sam of all people. Sam who, would always occupy some strange part of his heart that he could never quite ignore. "I think I am going to ask him to marry me." Remi said after a moment in a low tone, his pale gaze returning back to the bookmaker who, with literal magic, was starting to spark into colour.

"Look at that. I can see you.." He added with a boyishly charming half smile, his head tilting slightly to the side.

the farther i fall when i do

Coding base by Sky!

"I see. It sounds um...well, like how I would imagine it would be." Sam laughed a little awkwardly, unable to imagine a life where it would be normal for him to be unconscious and kicking men out of bed. In that moment he felt intensely jealous of Remi and sighed it out, trying to remind himself to not let his own hang ups colour anyone else.

Remi's secret caused him to swallow his mouthful of food very quickly and nearly choke, but he kept it together, just staring with wide eyes for a long quiet moment. "Oh. Um. I..well, that's..." The shard of pain in his chest bloomed but Sam forced a smile. "Wonderful, of course. You just surprised me...Congratulations, though I suppose that is usually said after you receive an answer..uhm.."

"Isn't it just a little fast?" He blurted out without meaning to, the question the first thing to come to mind. "If you've only been together a little while." Sam did not seem to notice the irony of himself asking this question.

Remi's comment about seeing him was confusing. "What do you mean you can see me?"

Samuel

I want you so badly

But you could be anyone

the higher i climb

Remi could only snort and shrug. When it came to he and Ronin, whatever was most unlikely or strange was usually what ended up happening. Then again, it wasn't as though that was their first kiss anyhow. That, and given Remi and the hunter had exchanged I love yous months before, the fact that nothing was happening in the right order hardly seemed to matter.

The alchemist winced slightly at Sam's near-choking on his news. It only reconfirmed that perhaps Sam was not exactly the right person for Remi to have shared this with...and yet it still felt appropriate somehow. "Fast?" The alchemist mused, his fingers gently tapping against the table. "In one sense, yes. But...I have known Ronin for years. We already live together...are raising a child together.." He added with a crooked smile. Growing a touch more serious though, Remi bit the inside of his lip for a moment. "He died...and..well, you know what that was like for me." Sombering entirely now, Remi ran a hand up his arm and let his head flop to the side. "I cannot handle any more loss. I will not do it. Losing you...and then Ianto..I just.." The alchemist ran his fingers through his curls and let himself sigh out the mounting tension he felt in his chest.

"I...I can see, in a way. Most things are very dark. Like trying to walk around at night." Even though Sam couild see perfectly well in the dark, the alchemist was fairly certain he would remember enough to know what it was like. "Some places though, I can see better than others. My shop and the guild for instance. And some people." Like Ronin, who was the emodiment of colour and clarity. Though...perhaps Sam needn't know that. "Like you, just now." Looking into Sam's eyes, Remi smiled fondly. "I can see the colour in your eyes. Your freckles. The copper of your hair." He described, letting his eyes wash across the ascended's face, dimples appearing on one of Remi's cheeks as his smile grew crooked.

the farther i fall when i do

Coding base by Sky!

Sam listened to Remi speak with a sympathetic expression on his face, but internally he was beginning to feel rather a mess. He wasn't even entirely sure why; on one hand he felt the indifference and beige happiness for a friend he was meant to, on the other he felt as if he were being mocked with something he could have had if only he had not been himself.

You haven't lost me came to his mind, but he held back on saying it. This wasn't his moment, and...he supposed Remi had lost him, really. Just as he'd lost Remi once.

"Well, then. If you feel so good about it, it must be a good idea. It would be nice to have a wedding, right now. It might help to lift people's spirits...I am not sure if I will be around to attend, though." Sam didn't realise how ominous that sounded as a sentence to just leave, and simply moved onto Remi's next topic.

"Oh. Is there a...connection, between the things you can see?" There was definitely an answer he was hoping for, but Sam tried to not get too expectant.

Samuel

I want you so badly

But you could be anyone

the higher i climb

"Well, I am not sure that is true—" Remi started to say, until Sam's final comment caught him entirely off-guard. "Where will you be?" He asked, thoughts of weddings and proposals cast easily away in the wake of what Remi (obviously) took to be quite ominous news.

Ruffling a hand through his hair again, Remi let his head toggle gently back and forth. "I...think it has to do with people I know well." (Wrong). "There are places I can see too, but people are the most clear. You look.." For a moment Remi seemed as if he was about to stretch his hand out, but thought better of it. "I am not sure that it is accurate, honestly. That, or your eyes were more full of colour than I ever recall." He added with a laugh.

the farther i fall when i do

Coding base by Sky!

"Oh -- I am going to explore." Sam announced this with a slight hesitation, as if he wasn't even sure himself if it was actually going to happen. "The Voice asked me to go into the Greatwood, using my invisibility. I'm..a little nervous, but I think it would be a good thing to do. It would get me out of my routine, which people say is a good thing."

Remi's explanation wasn't quite what he had wanted to hear, but it was close enough. "That's interesting...I suppose it must be a magical kind of blindness then." If Remi could see people he knew well, it would be easy enough to test. "So can you see Isla? I...suppose maybe since she's a unicorn you may not be able to...how about Phoebe? Or...or Jigano? What places can you see? Maybe if we could work it out we could help you see more."

Samuel

I want you so badly

But you could be anyone

the higher i climb

"Explore?" Remi said, brows knitting together softly. "The...but Sam. The fae have made it clear that they do not want us there. Eliza said that they were masters of illusion..how do you know that they will not see you?" Shaking his head in a manner that indicated he cared very little about Sam's routine or what others said, Remi captured his bottom lip with his teeth and fixed the book maker with an unhappy stare.

"Well...I think the blindness is real enough. I think whatever it is allowing me to see is the magical bit." Shifting slightly, Remi narrowed his eyes thoughtfully. "Well..sort of. She is always in my mind as it is. I do not see her, as much as feel her." Shaking his head, Remi thought back to the incident in the caves. "No..when the cave in happened, Phoebe was there. I could not see her then, though perhaps it has changed. So far I can see Ronin, you..Ianto...Rory a little, Amalia...Jigano, yes." That one still surprised him. "It is Ronin, you, and Ianto I can see the most clear." He added with a small smile.

As for places?

"The guildhall I can navigate around well enough. It is still mostly grey, but the outlines are there. Same with my shop, and even here. No where else, really."

the farther i fall when i do

Coding base by Sky!

Sam laughed that Remi would ask the question, thinking the answer obvious. But...perhaps he had forgotten about Sam's ability. After all, he had gone through a lot lately. "The Voice asked me to do it because I can be invisible. Do you remember? She would not have told me to do it if my invisibility wouldn't work for this, surely. If I see any Fae I shall simply disappear from them. Besides...they freed the prisoners they took before. I do not think they are deadly."

Ronin, you and Ianto. "So...hm. Do you think perhaps it is..people you've been in roman--oh wait, you said you could see Jigano. Unless there's something I am not aware of, I do not think you'd been romantically involved with him." Laughing, he shook his head. "Maybe it is just things you feel strongly about. Not that-- Oh, I mean--" He stiffened and held up his hands suddenly.

"I'm not presuming you feel strongly about me, of course. I wouldn't. Um. It would be rude to assume."

Samuel

I want you so badly

But you could be anyone

the higher i climb

Remi frowned, though had no rebuttal. Instead he folded his hands onto the table as one of his legs began to nervously tense beneath the bench. "Right..she would never place you in danger.." The alchemist murmured, as much to reassure himself as whatever help it might have provided Sam. "Do..you want company?" He asked suddenly, head tilted to the side. "I...went into the village with Ianto, as a raccoon. If they knew what I was, they did not seem to mind."

Snorting very loudly at the brief implication of Remi being involved with Jigano, the alchemist shook his head a definite no. Sam's awkwardness however brought a gracious and adoring smile to Remi's face. His lips caused dimples to appear in his cheeks as a smile slowly formed, and his blind gaze was cast down towards his hand for a moment.

"You know I feel strongly about you." Remi said gently. "We...we went through so much together, even if we cannot remember it now."

the farther i fall when i do

Coding base by Sky!

For a moment, Remi's offer of company was very tempting indeed. Sam would have once jumped at any excuse to spend time with him and would have valued the protection, but something stopped him. "No, thank you...I think this is something I need to do alone, Remi. The Voice asked me to, and I..would like to do something on my own. Besides..." He chewed at his lip and looked about as if someone might be listening. "I assume you have seen the notice. I want to be...away, for a while. If...if anything happens, I have the stone. You will know if something is wrong."

He smiled too at Remi's words, looking down and huffing out a little happy noise. "Yes. I...I didn't want to assume, but I hoped that would be the answer. I feel...tied to you, almost, as if we should have a bond even if it is not the kind we started with." These words came hesitantly, quietly; Sam nervous to say them in case somehow they broke that bond.

Samuel

I want you so badly

But you could be anyone

the higher i climb

Unhappily, Remi simply nodded in the face of what was probably one of the most confident convictions he'd ever heard from Sam. Still, he bit the inside of his lip, brows furrowing with the weight of his worry and concern that he felt helpless to give voice to. "Use the stone. Anytime. I will always come for you." The alchemist said finally, pale eyes sweeping up, his promise unbreakable.

"That..is a good way of putting it. I think part of me still remembers you, not the things that happened or what we did or didn't do, but you, even if my mind does not." Remi added, finding a boyish laugh bubbling on his lips.

the farther i fall when i do

Coding base by Sky!