The white sheep of the family
The whole story came crashing down, and took what little self-control and semblance of coherent thought Loren had with it. Remi had thought, all this time, that the summoner had abandoned the alchemist. Well that much was true. But it hadn’t necessarily been by choice and it certainly hadn’t been for someone else. Loren was careless, and cold, and unthinking, but not cruel. Never cruel.
Both of his hands came up to clutch at his hair, as if to drag the thoughts and emotions from his mind by force. He moaned, a terrible, broken sound, and swayed where he stood before slumping against the wall, barely able to stand. ”Remi, I-I would never…” The Launceleyn’s voice was frantic, and his hands now fell to his side, before twitching forward, almost of their own volition, heading towards the other man’s shoulders. However, they stopped just before they made contact and hovered there, since the summoner didn’t know what he would do, what Remi would do, if they touched.
”I loved you. I...I love you, even. How could I not? I would never...I can’t...I wouldn’t...do that. Not that. Never that.” Loren knew this was unfair to lay on the alchemist, but the Launceleyn couldn’t bear the thought that this was what Remi had been thinking the whole time and the Launceleyn couldn't seem to stop the words once they started pouring out of him in this unstable rush. ”I don’t…I don’t know how to explain what happened to me. I went mad. Crazy. Psychotic. I...I went to that dark place in my mind, the one I retreat to when the world gets too much and I need to shut it out and I can’t, can’t, can’t deal with it anymore, except this time, I, I, I didn’t come out. It...it went t-too well and I was in this, in this fog in my mind I couldn't find my way out of. Until...until...until the leaves started changing again and forced me to see how long I’d been...lost. But by then it was...it was too late.” It was all coming out wrong, the same as it had with Ronin, and Loren let his hands and his body fall, sinking to the ground with a sob.
Both of his hands came up to clutch at his hair, as if to drag the thoughts and emotions from his mind by force. He moaned, a terrible, broken sound, and swayed where he stood before slumping against the wall, barely able to stand. ”Remi, I-I would never…” The Launceleyn’s voice was frantic, and his hands now fell to his side, before twitching forward, almost of their own volition, heading towards the other man’s shoulders. However, they stopped just before they made contact and hovered there, since the summoner didn’t know what he would do, what Remi would do, if they touched.
”I loved you. I...I love you, even. How could I not? I would never...I can’t...I wouldn’t...do that. Not that. Never that.” Loren knew this was unfair to lay on the alchemist, but the Launceleyn couldn’t bear the thought that this was what Remi had been thinking the whole time and the Launceleyn couldn't seem to stop the words once they started pouring out of him in this unstable rush. ”I don’t…I don’t know how to explain what happened to me. I went mad. Crazy. Psychotic. I...I went to that dark place in my mind, the one I retreat to when the world gets too much and I need to shut it out and I can’t, can’t, can’t deal with it anymore, except this time, I, I, I didn’t come out. It...it went t-too well and I was in this, in this fog in my mind I couldn't find my way out of. Until...until...until the leaves started changing again and forced me to see how long I’d been...lost. But by then it was...it was too late.” It was all coming out wrong, the same as it had with Ronin, and Loren let his hands and his body fall, sinking to the ground with a sob.
Will blood tell
