OLIVER
At Sunjata's insistence, Oliver tried his best to take a few deep breaths. He sniffled a small bit and at first, it was extremely hard, but after a bit he was finally able to take full breaths. As well, he had stopped crying by now. That didn't mean he didn't absolutely feel like shit and the alcohol was really, really hitting hard now. He still felt incredibly guilty.
It may not look like it, but Oliver was still giving Sunjata all of his attention, listening as the man went on the explain the horrors he had been through. It changed a lot of how Oliver viewed Sunjata, but he still felt comfortable around him. Sunjata had been forced to kill those people, which was down right awful. There was blood on his hands, far more than Oliver might ever have. Still, it was in the past and he was forced. "You didn't deserve that...your father is a dick piece of shit. He shouldn't have forced you to do that. You're so kind and caring and just nice." Sunjata had showed Oliver that he was a kind person. A kind person wouldn't have rescued him from the cold. Jata was free from his father and could be himself.
Oliver, on the other hand, didn't have that excuse. He wasn't forced to do it.
"You don't understand." His words came out harsh, but still quiet. He sounded frustrated, like Sunjata had said something extremely incorrect. And he had, in Oliver's eyes. Sunjata did not understand what was going on.
The blonde's voice cracked as he spoke and he sounded heartbroken. Like he hated himself with every fiber of his being. "He was so nice to me Jata. He complimented me and he let me paint and he invited me to his guild. It's all over. I lost my chance. I fucked up and almost killed a nice person. I recognized the voice and it still wasn't enough." He had to focus on not crying again. Oliver was so excited that someone had actually invited him to join a guild. Someone had actually looked at his painting skills and wanted him to be part of something.
"It's the first time I felt like I wasn't a burden. Someone actually wanted me for me...and I ruined everything. I'm a piece of useless shit. I hurt people and I cant even do anything to make up for it." Oliver was dejected and still trying his hardest not to cry. In his tone, he was angry, but with himself. Nobody was to blame but himself. He believed every word he spoke.
"I tried to offer my help but there's nothing I can do.
It may not look like it, but Oliver was still giving Sunjata all of his attention, listening as the man went on the explain the horrors he had been through. It changed a lot of how Oliver viewed Sunjata, but he still felt comfortable around him. Sunjata had been forced to kill those people, which was down right awful. There was blood on his hands, far more than Oliver might ever have. Still, it was in the past and he was forced. "You didn't deserve that...your father is a dick piece of shit. He shouldn't have forced you to do that. You're so kind and caring and just nice." Sunjata had showed Oliver that he was a kind person. A kind person wouldn't have rescued him from the cold. Jata was free from his father and could be himself.
Oliver, on the other hand, didn't have that excuse. He wasn't forced to do it.
"You don't understand." His words came out harsh, but still quiet. He sounded frustrated, like Sunjata had said something extremely incorrect. And he had, in Oliver's eyes. Sunjata did not understand what was going on.
The blonde's voice cracked as he spoke and he sounded heartbroken. Like he hated himself with every fiber of his being. "He was so nice to me Jata. He complimented me and he let me paint and he invited me to his guild. It's all over. I lost my chance. I fucked up and almost killed a nice person. I recognized the voice and it still wasn't enough." He had to focus on not crying again. Oliver was so excited that someone had actually invited him to join a guild. Someone had actually looked at his painting skills and wanted him to be part of something.
"It's the first time I felt like I wasn't a burden. Someone actually wanted me for me...and I ruined everything. I'm a piece of useless shit. I hurt people and I cant even do anything to make up for it." Oliver was dejected and still trying his hardest not to cry. In his tone, he was angry, but with himself. Nobody was to blame but himself. He believed every word he spoke.
"I tried to offer my help but there's nothing I can do.
a disaster!
a massive mess
trying to not die
