Amalia
the shield of safrin
Her silence prevails through his sudden declaration, the girl listening intently as Loren speaks. It takes a level of self control not to bite back at certain things, to defend against the words so easily read as veiled critiques. Defensiveness, the need to always be right- it is a suit of armor easy to fall into. As easy as the guilt and anxiety she has worked so hard to overcome.
So instead she listens, willing herself to truly hear. Friendship, or something like it: this is what they're trying for, and he owes it to him to make herself open, to take the time and hear his words, just as she would want to be heard in turn. The pain of being cast out from one world, of being abandoned in a new, with conflict other than what he was born to... what must it be like?
She watches as Loren tops off his glass and waits for him to finish again. "I don't want war either," the Shield agrees, thinking darkly of Roana's attempt to cause just such a thing, of the justification the woman gave for taking countless lives. Slipping down so her head rests on her palms, elbows on the counter, Amalia looks up at Loren through dark eyes that are suddenly young. "I don't think the Ascended are all bad. Sam would never want to hurt anyone, and Rexanna is Kiada's mother, and Wessex- Wessex helped raise me. I... I love her." There's something hopeless in her expression, a fragile thing which threatens to break behind her earnest gaze.
"I wish that things could go back to how they were. Before... before. I wanted the world to open up so badly, but I never thought... I didn't know how complicated it would all become."
So instead she listens, willing herself to truly hear. Friendship, or something like it: this is what they're trying for, and he owes it to him to make herself open, to take the time and hear his words, just as she would want to be heard in turn. The pain of being cast out from one world, of being abandoned in a new, with conflict other than what he was born to... what must it be like?
She watches as Loren tops off his glass and waits for him to finish again. "I don't want war either," the Shield agrees, thinking darkly of Roana's attempt to cause just such a thing, of the justification the woman gave for taking countless lives. Slipping down so her head rests on her palms, elbows on the counter, Amalia looks up at Loren through dark eyes that are suddenly young. "I don't think the Ascended are all bad. Sam would never want to hurt anyone, and Rexanna is Kiada's mother, and Wessex- Wessex helped raise me. I... I love her." There's something hopeless in her expression, a fragile thing which threatens to break behind her earnest gaze.
"I wish that things could go back to how they were. Before... before. I wanted the world to open up so badly, but I never thought... I didn't know how complicated it would all become."
you are slowly growing
but you are still growing
and that is enough
