try to be living as your vice
and can you be my type?
As much as he didn’t want to, Peter understood at least a little of the struggle that Sunjata was. The situations were different, but all the worst parts of them seemed to show up the same, the traumas and compartmentalizations and sharp, heavy edges. In Peter they hid a numbness, a disconnect, that even now made it hard to really think about what had happened, what he’d gone through. He knew he’d always wanted the chance to be soft though.
A difference maybe, between him and Sunjata. Peter had never chosen to grow hard, it had happened so he could protect himself, so he could survive another day. So they would run together, into something that never seemed quite as bad as what the reality really was. And then one day, he could stop, and step neatly out of his haze and impossible to fully recall memories and into a life where things were how they were meant to be, where he was soft. Except, it didn’t really work like that, and he had learned the idea he was trying to pass onto Sunjata.
It’s why Peter doesn’t really react when the panther says he hadn’t thought of being both before. He understands. The hyenas head nods, feeling the murmur of uncertainty get washed away in the sudden warmth of understanding, sends a feeling of equal warmth back, pride and a tentative support, which feels strange but not bad. You might like it better than being one or the other. He offers, certainty in his silent voice. Peter knew, despite everything, he preferred how he was now to anything he’d been. Anything he might have become, if he wasn’t here.
Silence grows between them for a moment, Peter staring at the panther, not letting his eyes slip off into the distance like he usually would. There is a fair amount he’d give to know what was going on in the other attuneds mind at that moment. He is surprised when the admission of pride comes, and goes very still, a curious feeling coming off him. In a different Face, his eyes would be welling up, and he would be desperately, desperately trying to hide it, but he can’t quite hide something his mind is so willing to share. How does one stifle a silent voice anyway? It takes him even longer to actually summon words again, the rhythm of them awkward when he does manage. Thank you, but... Why would... why would it mean less to come from you? As far as Peter was concerned, it meant more. This was the first real conversation he’d had with Sunjata, and the man was proud of him. It didn’t exactly seem like something it was possible to fake, and he didn’t really think the other was the type of person to do that.
Somehow honestly made it feel even stranger than anything else Peter could have considered.
I think I would... simply prefer to not see anyone from... from before. Peter responded dryly, though he nodded his head again. I do my best here. I am... I want to... Peter snorted, not sure if he could really believe he was great, but... maybe he could believe he was taking some steps in the right direction. That he could be on his way. Do you think... are you doing... being great here? He didn’t now why, but it felt more rel if it wasn’t simply him. More attainable.
A difference maybe, between him and Sunjata. Peter had never chosen to grow hard, it had happened so he could protect himself, so he could survive another day. So they would run together, into something that never seemed quite as bad as what the reality really was. And then one day, he could stop, and step neatly out of his haze and impossible to fully recall memories and into a life where things were how they were meant to be, where he was soft. Except, it didn’t really work like that, and he had learned the idea he was trying to pass onto Sunjata.
It’s why Peter doesn’t really react when the panther says he hadn’t thought of being both before. He understands. The hyenas head nods, feeling the murmur of uncertainty get washed away in the sudden warmth of understanding, sends a feeling of equal warmth back, pride and a tentative support, which feels strange but not bad. You might like it better than being one or the other. He offers, certainty in his silent voice. Peter knew, despite everything, he preferred how he was now to anything he’d been. Anything he might have become, if he wasn’t here.
Silence grows between them for a moment, Peter staring at the panther, not letting his eyes slip off into the distance like he usually would. There is a fair amount he’d give to know what was going on in the other attuneds mind at that moment. He is surprised when the admission of pride comes, and goes very still, a curious feeling coming off him. In a different Face, his eyes would be welling up, and he would be desperately, desperately trying to hide it, but he can’t quite hide something his mind is so willing to share. How does one stifle a silent voice anyway? It takes him even longer to actually summon words again, the rhythm of them awkward when he does manage. Thank you, but... Why would... why would it mean less to come from you? As far as Peter was concerned, it meant more. This was the first real conversation he’d had with Sunjata, and the man was proud of him. It didn’t exactly seem like something it was possible to fake, and he didn’t really think the other was the type of person to do that.
Somehow honestly made it feel even stranger than anything else Peter could have considered.
I think I would... simply prefer to not see anyone from... from before. Peter responded dryly, though he nodded his head again. I do my best here. I am... I want to... Peter snorted, not sure if he could really believe he was great, but... maybe he could believe he was taking some steps in the right direction. That he could be on his way. Do you think... are you doing... being great here? He didn’t now why, but it felt more rel if it wasn’t simply him. More attainable.
cause we need to be given a good life
and can I be your type of metal?
PETER
Base Code by Sky!
