From being an Abandoned who had rarely left the Hollowed Grounds, to embracing the call of adventure, to dying and being reborn first as an Ascended and then as an Ancient, Maea has gone through quite the amount of changes in her life. One thing remains common, though, in her attempts to find out just where she belongs; she’s always had a craving for knowledge which has brought her to so many places and to meet so many people here in Caido. We can’t wait to see what else is in store for her!
Congratulations, Maea!
Credits
Court of the Fallen was created in October of 2018 by Odd, Honey, and Crooked.
Skinning and hosting by the epically talented Kaons, and functionality fanciness by the coding magic of Neowulf. If you ever see either of them around, make sure to show them some love!
"Musta been a big bubble." Adam mused, watching his fork spin before his eyes as he tried to imagine the trial that Pet described. Had Pet known it was going to happen before he'd gone to Safrin? Did he regularly throw himself into situations like that?
He seemed to have no issue with keeping himself in a cult-like family, at least. Adam sighed, knowing that tonight was not the night to get into this particular debate. "...It...It was dumb. I'm sorry - we can talk about it later, but I don't wanna get into it right now. ...I'm...glad you wanna keep me safe." Carefully, he didn't agree to Pet's request; it seemed his lover's way of 'keeping things safe' was to lay down and take whatever came at him, which was not at all Adam's way.
At least it didn't seem hard to summon tenderness between them, with the way Pet promised his return, their hands slipping together as he headed to the living room. The room was a mess, but there were chairs to sit on and a fire (not yet lit), along with many cushions. However, Adam did not sit on any of these, suddenly overcome by an intense tension, a need to say what he had to say before he lost the courage to do it.
"So uh, I wanted to tell you something..." He reached his his pocket for the note Jigano had written for him, but his fumbling, anxious fingers dropped it; worried that bending down to get it would ruin the mood (such that it were) he grabbed Pet's hands and decided to get it out, over and done with, as quick as he could: "Pet the thing is, we've been doing this for a bit, and you're real nice and handsome and I like how you talk t'me and I think uh--I think..well no, I know...Iloveyoumaybe? No, I do. Yeah." Wide eyes and frozen posture, Adam waited to see how Pet would react.
”It was.” Peter agrees solemnly, watching Adam watch his fork. A strange loop of men not knowing where to put their gazes. ”I... cried it? I think?” He tries to clarify, a crooked twist on his lips as he waits for the reaction to that.
The sigh Adam heaves makes Peter cock his head. Even he can tell the subject is only being put to bed, not put down completely, but at the moment that’s all he needs. He can report back, say they’d had a talk, which they had, and that things were settled. Which... they sort of were. For now.
Peter was led to the living room easily, following after Adam, a moth drawn to the flickering light of his desire. They didn’t sit, despite the cozy warmth surrounding them, the other man stayed standing, and Pet followed his example. This was clearly what the evening had been leading to, but he was lost. The moment swelled, beginning to insist upon itself as Adam fumbles with something from his pocket, drops it, and picks up Pets hands instead.
When the words finally poured from Adam, all Pet could do was blink, try to pull them apart in his mind. There was no reaction for a breath, then two, then Pets eyes began to shimmer, tears pooling in them even before he had fully realized the weight of what Adam said. Before he could even make sense of it. He pulled his hands away, moving them up to cup Adams face, holding him gently so he couldn’t pull away. ”Can... can you say it again?” The words were soft, the voice small, a dam for the emotion that surged through him, made his hands shake and his eyes wide.
Pet claiming he...cried the magic big bubble he almost drowned in was a truly bizarre addition to an already weird story and all Adam could do was laugh and shake his head, not sure how much of it had been some kind of God-induced hallucination on Pet's part (some of it had to be, right?).
Thankfully, it seemed Pet was willing to let discussion of Zariah slide away for the night. It would have to be addressed later, but Adam did not want Pet's 'family' souring the mood any more for this night, which he had hoped to be special.
And after Adam had stumbled his way through what he'd hoped would be a suave confession, he was unsure if he could ever make anything special again. Not knowing what reaction to expect from Pet given the mess he'd made of his words, he was quiet as hands came up to cup his face, only lifting one of his own hands, fingers gently brushing over Pet's scarred knuckles.
"Oh, sure. Of course." With a little laugh, Adam took a deep breath, trying to speak clearer this time: "I love you. I love you, Peter. You've really...really made me realise what all this relationship shit should be like."
It seemed strange to see Adam like this, when normally things came so easily to him. The romance, the words, the touches. Things that Pet found himself struggling with, dancing around, unsure of when to do what. Adam never seemed to stumble in their dance, and to see it now, well... It gave this a greater weight, made Pet pay more attention without him even realizing.
When the words were repeated, Pet sucked in a shuddering breath, and slowly, while Adam continued, tried to pull the taller man down towards him. Tried to press their foreheads, then their noses together. Tried to look him in the eye, Pets blue seeming even brighter with how they were ringed in tears. His fingers twitched against Adams cheeks, like he could somehow spell a response against his skin.
When the words came, they were strained, pushed through a breathless throat and leaden, useless tongue. ”I love you too.” And then a laugh, slow at first but growing into a giddy, hysterical racket that only stopped when Peter clamped a hand over his mouth and tried to pull back, afraid now that he had ruined the moment.
With a smile on his face that came from a genuine joy, Adam let himself be pulled down towards Pet, kissing his forehead on the way. They looked in each others eyes, so close it made him laugh, though he also found himself stunned by the blue in Pet's eyes. At Pet's words Adam didn't give him a chance to pull away, just grabbed him and lifted him up, trying to hold him under his butt and pick him up.
"Come on, come with me." As he walked (a little wobbly) to the staircase and upstairs, he kissed Pet's neck, light and soft; still giving out little laughs between each press of his lips. "Cos I can feel an intense need to cuddle coming on." Reaching his bed he dropped Pet down on it then climbed over him, nuzzling his face into his shoulder and grabbing around Pet's sides, rolling about on the sheets in a sickeningly sweet way.
At the slightest touch, Pet found himself frozen, nearly mesmerized by the arms pulling him close, trying to lift him up. As if by instinct he wound his arms around Adams neck, and resisted the urge to do the same with his legs, anting some insurance in case they collapsed.
Come with me. Adam said, as if any part of Pet could deny him at the moment. Half walking and half being dragged, they made their way up the stairs, Pet trusting in Adam to lead him while he lost himself in the feeling of lips on his neck. A soft sound pushed out of him as his back his the warm softness of a bed he’d grown familiar with, made even more familiar by the even warmer body that draped over him, pressed into him.
”This is love.” Pet all but sighed, quiet, like he was talking only to himself. His fingers buried in Adams hair, his legs wrapping around the other man properly as they rolled. If Adam were to look up, he would see an almost rapturous expression on Pets face. Like he had been living without something crucial up until this point, like a man from the desert who was seeing fields of green for the first time.
In the soft sheets and with Pet curled around him, Adam thought he could be happy for a very long time. Pet's expression of happiness (he'd seen lust and joy and amusement before, but never this kind of sheer contentment) filled his heart with warmth and he reached up to cup his cheek, stroking his thumb over a scar on Pet's face.
"Yeah, I guess it is." He stayed still for a moment, just enjoying the moment, trying to save it in his mind for later - then he ruffled Pet's hair with a laugh and flopped over, trying to bring Pet down with him so they were cuddling side by side underneath a healthy portion of blankets that Adam pulled around them. "There's something I wanna do, though. Now that we're here."
And for once, it wasn't sex (not that it couldn't be that later). Reaching down between them to find one of Pet's hands and hold it, Adam looked up to his eyes and said: "I want you to tell me everything about you I don't know yet. What happened before here. What you wanna do with your life. What you like and what you don't. I just..." He laughed, a little embarrassed. "I wanna know all about you, babe. I guess it's a symptom of the love thing."
Peter has a moment, a breath, a heartbeat to enjoy the feeling of Adams hand in his face, the warmth and acceptance that radiates off of it flooring him, fluttering his eyes closed softly. The peace was broken soon enough by a giddy laugh, the aforementioned hand moving up to ruffle through his hair, sending a shiver down Pets spine and driving him closer into Adams side, under the veritable mountain of blankets that Adam pulled up.
His head cocked, as much as it could, when Adam said there was something he wanted to do. Immediately, Pet expected some kind of foreplay, or silly prelude to it, and was surprised by the gentle grip on his hand, the seriousness in Adams honeyed eyes. ”A-Are you sure?” He asked softly, worry tinging the words, out of place in the mood that surrounded them. ”It’s not... good.” It was very far away from good actually, but he’d never had anyone ever actually ask him about his life before. People either already knew or didn’t care.
”Where... where should I start?” The question came before he’d gotten Adams answer, lwas or he already sort of knew what it would be.
Silly foreplay was absolutely on the cards for later, but Adam was keenly aware that most of his relationships in his life that had come this far had been defined by only physical connection and he wanted more than that with Pet. He didn't quite have the words for it (or maybe the words were 'I love you') but he wanted it all. Pet's joy, his despair, love, pain, future, past...he wanted to drink in everything he could and still have more.
He'd had addictions before but never with quite so much intensity.
"Babe, I'm aware it's not good...uh..." With a bit of a laugh he lifted Pet's hands to their eyelines, the scars on his skin a marked sign of a hard life. Kissing Pet's knuckles to show he was not mocking him for the scars, he let the hand rest by his lips, sure there would be much more cause to comfort him soon.
As for where to start... "The beginning is usually a pretty good place."
01-24-2020, 02:06 AM (This post was last modified: 01-24-2020, 03:21 PM by Peter.)
Loneliness... is such a sad affair
and I can hardly wait
Pet hiccups out a squinty smile, not used to the support, the understanding. He lets his hand be moved easily, laughing gently when his knuckles were kissed. Maybe... maybe he could do this. Maybe it wouldn’t ruin anything. And Adam was asking. Squirming to get more comfortable, closer to Adam, he bit his lip, trying to figure out how to go through this.
”I-I guess um... the very beginning is uh, when I... when my dad, Jack um... when my mom died, he... sold me. To a man. And he uh... I...” He’d barely gotten through a sentence and he was trembling, voice wavering. ”I did... bad things. With him.” His eyes were growing distant, before he blinked, shaking his head to try and focus again. ”I did... bad things with him. And he... did bad things to...” He trailed off again, but came back quicker this time. ”His name was Ro-Ro... Rock Salt.”
As Pet moved to get closer to him Adam willingly took him in, wrapping his arms and legs tight around the other man, making a sort of cocoon of blankets and limbs to protect him as he summoned up memories of his violent past. Adam half felt he might need it himself, anyway - he'd learnt recently that a part of the whole love thing was feeling a horribly burning anger in your chest when you found out about past sins committed against your love. Nothing you could do but wish you were back there helping.
With only little 'mhm' sounds to show he was listening, Adam stayed mostly silent, nodding every so often. He could guess well enough what 'bad things' were - he'd lived in many seedy towns, known of many such deals. They were disgusting, but they happened, and he felt more of an angry sense of wrongness than any kind of shock.
"Rock Salt...lemme guess, he gave himself that name? Exactly the kind of dumb edgy shit someone who likes themselves too much would use." The one thing he could say for himself was that he'd at least never run around with an over polished nickname. Hopefully his little observation would make Pet laugh, even if just for a second, before he continued, Adam gesturing for him to go on.
Peter couldn’t help it. Despite the seriousness of the conversation, the terrible memories he was shifting through, he cracked a smile at Adams words, almost mortifying himself when he nodded confirmation. ”I-I knew his... his real name. He told me... if I told anyone, ever, that he... he’d eat me without ki-killing me first.” The threat sounds utterly ridiculous to say out loud now, but at the time it had terrified him, left him sick and shaking through the night as he tried desperately to forget the name that could damn him. ”It... it was Victor.” Pet squeezes Adams hand when he says it, some of the old fear still rising up, but it feels good to say it to. Like a small victory.
”I worked for... I was owned by him uh, until... until people from the city came. Well... they came a lot, but... to trade things, or ask favours. This was different. They came to kill everyone. Or take them. I was... I was taken. The words come faster now, maybe even a little easier, though that’s only because he’s skipped over the very very worst, ‘bad stuff’ summarizing it well enough, and he’s now at the part of his past that feels hazy and dreamlike.
”They did. uh.. something to me, and I... I had like magic, but... but not. And it hurt. I had to be... i had to do good for them, in... in tests, but I didn’t know about them, or... or what I was supposed to do, and sometimes... sometimes I did good, but... mostly I did bad. And they were... they weren’t happy. With me. I think...”{.say} Peter shakes his head, moving on. ”That’s when... or... yea, no that’s when I... I met Alex. He said he could help me, but... only if I helped him.”
Adam waited for the real name, a smile on his lips, eager to hurt this figure from Pet's past the only way he now could, with his words. As it turned out, it would be pretty easy. "Victor? Oh, Jesus. I see why he went by a nickname. Ain't anyone scared of Victor." Hopefully, this levity would make Pet smile, not make him feel as if Adam was taking light of his past.
People from the city...guards? Bounty hunters? Do-gooders? He couldn't really be sure, and he wasn't going to make Pet dwell by asking unnecessary details. Either way, he'd gotten out alive, which was the important thing. It seemed like after this event things got easier for Pet to talk about so Adam relaxed just a little, laying back more and pushing a hand through Pet's hair.
"Magic....? So, not like the magic you have here?" Adam thought this might be important. He didn't want to ask Pet to use his spells if they were borne of something he'd rather forget.
The name 'Alex' cropped up and he raised an eyebrow. "Lemme guess, he didn't help you?"
Peter couldn’t help it. He did smile a little at Adams teasing, not directed at him but at his past, a boogeyman that’s even now, he was afraid of it. It took some of that fear away, something he had never thought would happen without more time, maybe a lifetime.
He was still telling his story though, and didn’t have time to pause, in case he never started up again. There was a chance to answer Adams question though, first with a gentle shake of his head, then with words. ”It’s not like.... not like here. I don’t remember um... all the details I... I never got told, but... it was something they put in me? A.... a big needle, and... it hurt.” Pet shakes his head, trying to differentiate the pain from everything else. ”They said... most people uh... most people died, but I didn’t. And I had... magic, but it was... they called it something else.”
”He did help me. To start.” Pet insisted, then paused, chewing his lip anxiously. ”But he... I had to repay him. So I started helping him, and it kept... getting bigger and bigger, what I owed, and what he did, and...” There’s a pause, like Pet has only just realized something, only just put the pieces together. ”He said he loved me. I... hes a liar. And when I... I said I didn’t want to do anymore for him, that I wanted to... to stop hurting people, and stop... everything, he said... one more. Just one more.”
Pet is no longer looking at Adam, no longer looking at anything at all, except maybe a far off memory. ”I had to... help blow up a building. There was a... timer, and...” He shakes his head. ”It wasn’t long enough. I... wasn’t supposed to come out.”
