over and over again

M  A   E    A I talked to God to no avail Said, "If you won't save me, please don't waste my time." "You assume that's the worst of my offenses, good sir" she countered, with a wry sile. "I may also have tried to stage a coup to establish myself as the leader of the Hollow Ground... as you do." It had very nearly succeeded too. But in hindsight, Maea was almost glad for the bout of illness that prevented her from going through with the last stages. She was not cut out for leadership, and the only reason she had even attempted it in the first place was the impending crisis of the barrier possibly coming down, along with the unknown threats that may or may not lurk beyond. As for being devoted to Ludo... "Hmm... Not sure if devotee is the right word. It was the first deity to ever respond to my prayers, and I like them a lot. I suppose... if I had to choose one to call for, it would be them? So if that makes me a follower, then I guess I am." Reaching out to the snow around them with her thoughts, Maea used her powers to form a snowball and lobbed it at Amun. "None of them are too keen to listen to me overall, so beggers can't be choosers, can they?" She laughed, and made a little dash forward; perhaps it was stupid to waste what little energy she had on playing around, but it was hard to resist.

my whole life is mine, but whoever says so will deprive me,

for it is infinite.

Maea’s revelation stopped Amun in his tracks momentarily. When he turned to face her, his expression was delighted. ”Is that so? I’m impressed, icy.” Then he tilted his head and smirked. ”What stopped you, though?” With that, he resumed his forward motion, though his tone had been eager to hear the answer to his question.

As she worked through her feelings and relationship to Ludo and the gods, he simply forged ahead, pressing on against the snow. "So if another god answered you, you'd consider worshiping them instead?" Tone was still mostly casual, but there was a slightly quiet edge to it.

When the snowball hit him squarely in the back of his head, however, he halted once more. Turning, he grinned wickedly at her. Then he stooped down and scooped up two snowballs, one in each hand. Lobbing at her, he sprang into motion, moving as erratically as he knew how, hoping to throw off her aim.

Thankfully, he had breath to spare for talking. "I don't think you're allowed to call yourself a beggar, or say that none of them are keen on you when one of them danced with you, icy." His tone was mocking, but lacked any hint of malice.

by being moved I exert my empire,

making the dreams of night real

AMUN

M  A   E    A I talked to God to no avail Said, "If you won't save me, please don't waste my time." "Poor health. While I lay coughing and sweating, someone else got the jump on me and took the spot. After that, all my allies changed their mind." She managed to dodge the first projectile, only to have the second one hit her squarely in the chest. Laughing at the spray of cold that trickled in beneath the collar, she busied herself with fashioning a few more snowballs. It gave her time to think, to consider. It was old lack of confidence that spoke, really. The inherited attitude of 300 year's worth of spite, of empty prayers that went unanswered, of lingering disbelief that any god - even the one who'd done so much for her, who'd given her so much - would actually want her loyalty. Or friendship. But when Amun put things in perspective, she supposed she didn't have much to complain about. "Well... no. Not just like that. I've seen the Core, and the Voice... but we don't really get along. I guess... but how can I say I don't favor them if I've never met the rest?" Chucking three snowballs at him in one go - one with each hand, and a third with her telekinesis - Maea slowed down as the cold air began to wear on her windpipes. Running was a bad idea, it seemed.   "How about you, do you have anyone you prefer?"

my whole life is mine, but whoever says so will deprive me,

for it is infinite.

Amun waggled his eyebrows at Maea. ”Some allies.” Tilting his head, he regarded her with a mischievous gaze. "So was this before the Merciless, then?" Tone and expression curious, he waited eagerly for her response.

Then he ducked away from one of her snowballs, though the other two hit him in the thigh and shoulder respectively. Holding up his hands in mock surrender, he grinned. Then his eyes narrowed. "What do you mean, you don't get along? And do you mean the rest of the old gods then, icy?" The Ascended's tone was casual.

At her question, he smirked, making sure his fangs were visible. "I do, yes." With that, he winked at her and spun on his heel, resuming their forward march. The mountain pass to the portal chamber was pretty closer by this point, though the terrain had also grown rougher as they climbed the road in the Fangs.

by being moved I exert my empire,

making the dreams of night real

AMUN

M  A   E    A I talked to God to no avail Said, "If you won't save me, please don't waste my time." "Yes. I do recall seeing that name on the noticeboard. Something Launceleyn... apparently there are a few of them. Never had anything to do with any of them. By that moniker, I take it she isn't a particularly soft touch?" Frowning, she left off the games and returned to the walking - one step, two steps, onward thorugh the wind. Slowly the landscape was changing, the ground rising ever so slightly, and when the snow parted she could see something on the horizon, like a cloudbank that wasn't moving. Hills? Trees? Maea couldn't tell, and too preoccupied with the conversation to ask. "So many questions. Does it matter? Old gods, new gods... They're all the same in that they're more powerful than me by far, and if they set their minds to something I can either bow and obey, or stay out of their way if I don't agree. The Voice made it perfectly clear that I would be wise to do the latter." Turning to face Amun, she laid eyes on him just in time to see the smile, the flash of fangs, hear his reply. And suddenly, it all made sense. The way he moved, the lack of care for the climate, the cold, how he had been so quick to move when he shouldn't... Maea swallowed, hard. It... was ridiculous, to be afraid now. If he really wanted to hurt her, he could have just left her out there on the tundra. And yet... suspecting something and having it confirmed was two entirely different things. Thing was, she couldn't entirely control it. The way her stomach clenched, how cold her fingers felt. How the laughter died away in her eyes, and curdled on her tongue. "You're ascended, then?" Not a question, really. It was more that she didn't know what else to say. All the words... just died.

my whole life is mine, but whoever says so will deprive me,

for it is infinite.

Amun shrugged. "She's not queen anymore, and the one time I spoke to her she didn't strike me as too difficult to interact with." Although the potter's tone was less than certain about the former queen, his expression was still light.

Winking, he tilted his head at her. "I don't know. You tell me if it matters." The potter's eyes gleamed. "Are you going to stay out of the way?" His voice held a quiet intensity.

At the fear in Maea's eyes and voice, the Ascended chuckled, the sound dark and low. "Aw come on, icy, we were having such a nice conversation. Don't go all squirrelly on me now." His tone was light, but his eyes had hardened somewhat.

Still, he didn't stop his steady forward motion, leading them deeper into the mountains, farther down the path. "And before you get on your high horse, your chosen god ordered the genocide of my people, and I'm still helping you get back to the Hollow. So I'd be careful before you start slinging accusations around."

by being moved I exert my empire,

making the dreams of night real

AMUN

M  A   E    A I talked to God to no avail Said, "If you won't save me, please don't waste my time." Just like that, the fun was gone. How was it that she could see only reassuring friendliness one moment, and a hidden threat behind every glance the next? It wasn't right, and it wasn't fair, but damn it if she could stop herself from inching just a little bit further away from him. Not that it mattered, not that it would make a difference if he decided to do anything. But see, it wasn't so much the teeth or the abnormal speed as it was the memory of stalking footsteps somewhere behind her on a dark street, a stream of sticky silver shimmering through the air as a head tumbled off its shoulders, and the overpowering stench of petrichor in the air as a gentle voice told her to please mind her own fucking business. Memories that were too fresh, too close, that came welling down upon her like an avalanche, with no care for timing or the fact that she was being rude to someone who'd only been kind so far. "I'm sorry" she murmured, barely more than a whisper that shouldn't have carried over the wind. "It's not that... they locked my people in too, and it's not... Just bad experience, okay? Nothing personal..." If only she could explain it, even to herself. But fear was like that, sometimes. Irrational, unwarranted - or was it? - and completely pointless. It was ridiculous, really. Sam was ascended, and she didn't mind him at all. Kristopher... had been, and he had frightened her, and enjoyed seeing her fear. Then he had died... and it changed nothing. Then there was Wessex, who cared nothing for her and never had, even when Maea tried to help. And where did that leave Amun? A big unanswered riddle. A question that didn't like to give answers, with unknown goals, wants and needs... and perhaps it was the unknown about it all that scared her the most. This is where Jigano and the other loreseekers would urge her to step forward and ask questions. To challenge her fears and go looking for the deeper truth, the hidden knowledge she desired. But Maea... only bowed her head and wove her trembling fingers into the shawl, holding tight as though her life depended on it. "I'm sorry" she said again.

my whole life is mine, but whoever says so will deprive me,

for it is infinite.

At Maea’s apology, Amun’s eyes tightened. They turned darker as she continued to speak. "That so, icy?" His teasing tone had turned scornful, slightly cruel and judgmental where it had been fun before. "Because it sure feels personal." With that he turned to continue trudging through the snowdrifts.

He didn't bother turning around when she next spoke. In fact, he was silent for a long while. When he finally did speak himself, it was quiet, barely audible over the sound of the wind that seemed omnipresent in Halo. "Fear and loathing of the new and the unknown is always the easiest route. But it's never the right one." Pausing, he stared into the distance. "We're close." He picked up the pace, though not to a punishing degree.

by being moved I exert my empire,

making the dreams of night real

AMUN

M  A   E    A I talked to God to no avail Said, "If you won't save me, please don't waste my time." The silence was all the more jarring because it followed on the cheerful banter. Maea felt it like a leaden weight to her stomach. A slight nausea that weighed her down, as if it was all her fault... and she guessed it was. Placing one foot in front of the other, barely seeing where she was going, she wrestled with herself and with his accusations until it finally became unbearable. "Are you saying I shouldn't be afraid, then? Of any ascended, ever, even though you could break me like a twig just becuase you feel like it?" That was just as unreasonable as the fear itself. Like saying she shouldn't be wary of wolves because they might not kill her, because they might not attack her when hungry. Just because she had met one or two that didn't bite, should she trust them all... or stay on the safe side? "I'm saying I try not to judge, but I've been given more reason to stay away from ascended than to trust them, and... I don't know you. Really I don't. So far you've been kind, and I don't want to lump you in with all the nightmare stories they told us when I was a kid... but how am I to know what's real or not?" When you don't answer my questions. But she didn't say the last part aloud. Maea hated that every word she said sounded like an excuse, hated it even more than she meant it, that she really thought that way. They made her sound so... cowardly. Close minded. And maybe she was, for all that she tried to change.

my whole life is mine, but whoever says so will deprive me,

for it is infinite.

Chuckling, the sound dark and low, Amun halted and turned to look at Maea. ”First, I told you I’m a lover, not a fighter. I could hardly break you like a twig, even if you are far too skinny.” He gestured at his own, weaponless, only leanly muscled frame.

”Second, are you saying that I should be afraid of every follower of Ludo just because they might kill me? I’ve heard they’re a genocidal lot, icy.” He raised his eyebrows in a challenge. ”You should only be afraid of me if you think I’m a monster.” Leaning forward, he grinned (though baring his fangs might’ve been more accurate). ”Do you think I’m a monster?” His dark eyes glittered against the icy white backdrop.

The Ascended smirked, though this time it was as cold as it had been warm before. ”What happened to doing the right thing, even when it’s hard, icy? To not giving in to prejudice or falling prey to the wisdom of the masses.” Turning on his heel, he stalked forward again, leading them higher into the mountains. Up ahead, he could just see the entrance to the portal chamber, where guards no doubt lurked. ”Find your own truth, instead of giving in to others'.”

by being moved I exert my empire,

making the dreams of night real

AMUN

M  A   E    A I talked to God to no avail Said, "If you won't save me, please don't waste my time." Pale eyes darted to his frame as he gestured to himself, but the lean figure did nothing to assuage her fears. Who knew what hidden powers he possessed? They were not so different there, not so easy to read and judge true... who would ever believe it if Maea claimed she'd been party to murder, after all? Not with those small hands, so white and seemingly clean. And he might not have to worry about the followers of Ludo, but the Abandoned? Oh, he should be afraid of them. Was that not why even the gods avoided her kin? Capable of too much, able to reach heights beyond what their creators intended... (As far as she knew, at least. Who could truly say what Caido had meant this world to look like?) But... Even though her stomach thrilled as he leaned in with those fangs exposed - had they grown larger than before? - and even though the intensity of his gaze made something cold trickle down the back of her neck... Maea shook her head. Monster? No... She could only see a man. A potentially dangerous man, but... weren't they all? "No" she breathed. "You're not." She had stopped when he did, and when Amun spun back around to keep heading for the rocky slope and the destination they apparently were heading for, she lingered for a breath. It was... not easy, to be challenged like this. To be tried, and tested, and found wanting both in his eyes and her own. Her lips twitched as she slowly followed in his tracks, a hint of a weary, bitter smile; "For someone who scoffs at learning, you are awfully wise. Sure you're not better suited for the Loreseekers than me, sage one?"

my whole life is mine, but whoever says so will deprive me,

for it is infinite.

As Maea said she didn’t think he was a monster Amun smirked. It was not a friendly expression. ”Well. Glad you think so." He paused. "Now at least. Let's see what happens when you’re safely home and no longer have to rely upon me, icy.” He winked at her, an ironic echo of his earlier playfulness. Because he'd seen her fear, and he would not forget.

Then, however, his dark facade sloughed away as if it had never been, and he walked down the path with a spring in his step. ”I told you, I prefer to be out in the world than studying it in the pages of some tome.” He grinned mischievously, though she couldn't see it from behind. "Plus your sage leader is way too much of a stick in the mud for my tastes." With that, he led her towards the entrance to a cave. Inside, she'd see some guards idling about, along with a pillar of light.

by being moved I exert my empire,

making the dreams of night real

AMUN

M  A   E    A I talked to God to no avail Said, "If you won't save me, please don't waste my time." There wasn't much she could say to that. Because, in all honesty? Even Maea didn't know what she would think then. How she would end up remembering this encounter. It had started off good, and perhaps it might still end the same, but there were too many words unsaid in between there and here. Too much old prejudice, and not enough time to process her traumas. This new predicament she was in didn't exactly help matters any. "We'll just have to see" she sighed. "Feel free to prove me wrong?" It wasn't quite an invitation, nor entirely a challenge, but it was an outstretched hand, there for the taking if he ever felt like accepting her apology. Because she meant it; Maea didn't want to be afraid of him, and if he cared to try and pick up the tone they'd started to find... well. She wouldn't turn him away. At least.. she hoped she wouldn't. The pale-haired woman was just about to retort in defense of her guildmaster when she became aware of the cave they were heading towards. She saw people moving about there, and a peculiar light phenomenon that lit the sky for some distance around them. There was something eerily familiar about the way it towered up like a pillar, like... like a spire, and alarmbells started to ring in her mind when they got closer to the entrance. "What is this place? I thought you said you'd take me to the Hollow Ground..." she asked, turning to Amun with wide eyes. Her lips had gone pale, nearly colorless, and though there was still fear in her eyes, it no longer seemed directed at him.

my whole life is mine, but whoever says so will deprive me,

for it is infinite.

Amun shot a challenging glance back at Maea. ”Oh, so the burden of changing your mind is on me, icy? You have no ability to form your own conclusions absent my intervention? Without me holding your hand you'll inevitably conclude that I'm a monster?" Grinning without an ounce of humor, he turned back to face the cavern before them.

At her question, the grin morphed into a full on smirk. "I said I am, and I am. That's a portal. You missed this particularly development on your travails through time and space, but you'll step through it, and it'll take you to this foggy place. You'll see signs for various place. That's where there are other portals, including the Hollowed Grounds. Take one step towards it, you'll be at the sign. Take another, you'll find yourself in the Spire. Don't worry, it's safe to walk to the entrance from there." With that, he prowled forward, almost uncaring if she followed at this point. "And unless you wanna chance another mystery storm, it's the only way home for you." He kept his steady march towards the light.

by being moved I exert my empire,

making the dreams of night real

AMUN