Don't paint wonderful lies on me that wash away
Fingering the edges of her shawl, Maea bowed her head in turn as he accepted her apology and offered one in return. Breathing in through the nose, she held the air in her lungs for a moment and forced out a good amount of tension with the exhale that followed. Repeated it, like Loren had taught her, until her shoulders didn't feel as painfully stiff as before.
They were talking. That made everything easier. Words were something they had always been good at sharing.
"It was never my intention to blackmail you into anything," she said, shaking her head. In hindsight she realized how it must have looked, and chided herself for not considering it before. "I intended to speak to you about the Academy as soon as I was offered a spot. Yes, I knew you wouldn't like the idea, and that it might take some persuation, but... I thought my reasons were good enough to at least bring it up."
Shifting a paper on the table before her so that it lay straight on the pile, Maea thought back to the events of the recent past, laid it out straight in her mind so she could see her own decisions more clearly. Explain herself better.
"Then... Sunjata told me about the Advocates. Said he wanted more information about Halo, and I... saw no reason not to offer my help, since I already wanted to go there. I thought, that if he came along you would see that I was serious, that it wasn't just a whim because I wanted to play at being a mage.
"And I... really wanted to help him."
Blushing slightly, she touched her fingers to her neck. Tugged the collar a bit higher, hoping that the fabric and her long hair would suffice to hide the fading bruises on her skin. Intimately placed, quite deliberate in their making.
"It seems my thinking gets... clouded, where he's concerned."
They were talking. That made everything easier. Words were something they had always been good at sharing.
"It was never my intention to blackmail you into anything," she said, shaking her head. In hindsight she realized how it must have looked, and chided herself for not considering it before. "I intended to speak to you about the Academy as soon as I was offered a spot. Yes, I knew you wouldn't like the idea, and that it might take some persuation, but... I thought my reasons were good enough to at least bring it up."
Shifting a paper on the table before her so that it lay straight on the pile, Maea thought back to the events of the recent past, laid it out straight in her mind so she could see her own decisions more clearly. Explain herself better.
"Then... Sunjata told me about the Advocates. Said he wanted more information about Halo, and I... saw no reason not to offer my help, since I already wanted to go there. I thought, that if he came along you would see that I was serious, that it wasn't just a whim because I wanted to play at being a mage.
"And I... really wanted to help him."
Blushing slightly, she touched her fingers to her neck. Tugged the collar a bit higher, hoping that the fabric and her long hair would suffice to hide the fading bruises on her skin. Intimately placed, quite deliberate in their making.
"It seems my thinking gets... clouded, where he's concerned."
