OLIVER
Loren's words were kind, but also unhelpful. Oliver knew that he was useless because he hadn't done anything to help anyone. Unlike pretty much everyone else in the Grounds, he hadn't done a single thing to be important or meaningful, not once making a lasting impression or proving to be worth saving. "But if you live a life for others, won't you be helpful in the end?" Loren had been so helpful and kind to everyone. He had given Oliver a place to stay and had established himself as a friend... but then again, he didn't ever seem to be happy with that. "How can you meet the balance? Of you know, helping others but also being happy?" Loren seemed to have finally taken a grasp of this, so hopefully he'd be able to guide Oliver in the right direction seeing as he was neither helpful nor completely happy anymore.
There is a light shrug and Oliver leaves it at that. He can't answer it because he knows the answer is a stupid one: he doesn't know. There is no way that he can for sure know that Amun hasn't been with others. "Sorry if this is too much information... but back during LongNight, he and someone who I won't name out of respect came up with me. They flirted with me and each other, I tried flirting back, but... the man who won't be named basically told me that Amun was his- and Amun drank from him- while having me sit there and watch... and... yeah." It was hard to explain and the entire time, Oliver didn't look at Loren's face, clearly struggling to really speak about this. His face was beet red and his voice soft, reflecting how vulnerable he felt. "It's stupid, I know... and trust me, I won't be making the same mistake again. I won't be having any one-offs any time soon with my condition, but if it does happen? That's all it is." It hurt to say that, to know that he probably wouldn't have anything more than that. Until he actually served a purpose in their society, all he would be was that kid who doesn't understand how romance and relationships worked. Pitiful, really.
Harper wasn't going to be like Amun, absolutely, but what if Harper found out? Learned how terrible Oliver was with romance and that he was incapable of understanding it? It'd be embarrassing and detrimental. "I'll try. Just... gotta find the right time and right way to say it." And honestly? Oliver would probably never find the right time nor ever actually learn how to confess his feelings without being an annoying, weirdo, freak. Great job Oliver, you really do learn nothing from your life lessons.
Finally looking back at Oliver, he let out a playful eyeroll. "Listen, I didn't know if it really was all that common. Just because my old home and this place share one similarity, doesn't mean everywhere else has it. I mean hell, this place has books but apparently, there is no way to quickly print books! You just have to handwrite them!" That was one comparison that really stuck out to him. Things may seem similar on the surface, but they were drastically different when truly examined.
There is a light shrug and Oliver leaves it at that. He can't answer it because he knows the answer is a stupid one: he doesn't know. There is no way that he can for sure know that Amun hasn't been with others. "Sorry if this is too much information... but back during LongNight, he and someone who I won't name out of respect came up with me. They flirted with me and each other, I tried flirting back, but... the man who won't be named basically told me that Amun was his- and Amun drank from him- while having me sit there and watch... and... yeah." It was hard to explain and the entire time, Oliver didn't look at Loren's face, clearly struggling to really speak about this. His face was beet red and his voice soft, reflecting how vulnerable he felt. "It's stupid, I know... and trust me, I won't be making the same mistake again. I won't be having any one-offs any time soon with my condition, but if it does happen? That's all it is." It hurt to say that, to know that he probably wouldn't have anything more than that. Until he actually served a purpose in their society, all he would be was that kid who doesn't understand how romance and relationships worked. Pitiful, really.
Harper wasn't going to be like Amun, absolutely, but what if Harper found out? Learned how terrible Oliver was with romance and that he was incapable of understanding it? It'd be embarrassing and detrimental. "I'll try. Just... gotta find the right time and right way to say it." And honestly? Oliver would probably never find the right time nor ever actually learn how to confess his feelings without being an annoying, weirdo, freak. Great job Oliver, you really do learn nothing from your life lessons.
Finally looking back at Oliver, he let out a playful eyeroll. "Listen, I didn't know if it really was all that common. Just because my old home and this place share one similarity, doesn't mean everywhere else has it. I mean hell, this place has books but apparently, there is no way to quickly print books! You just have to handwrite them!" That was one comparison that really stuck out to him. Things may seem similar on the surface, but they were drastically different when truly examined.
I JUST WANT MY EXISTENCE
TO BE MORE THAN TREMBLING
TO BE MORE THAN TREMBLING
