- NATE -
but who am I to say?
let's all just run away
let's all just run away
It shouldn't be so easy to pull Sunjata in, the shift should not have happened so fast, so suddenly, and Nate tries to brace himself for what's coming next, whatever hell they have to slog through. Though there is a part of Nate that's glad it wasn't a fight to pull the other man close, to get him down onto the ground. He might not feel pain but that doesn't mean he can throw himself against barbs forever.
The shaking breaks his heart though, along with the face pressing into his neck. Trying to hide. It brings back different memories, no better than before really, and it makes Nate shift, try to pull more of the other man against him, onto his lap. "Okay." He repeats softly, lips pressed against whatever part of Sunjata's face isn't hidden away. There's a tremble in his voice now, and he doesn't have the strength to hold it back anymore, doesn't have it in him to hold himself up as well. His mind's been trying to collapse this whole time, has only stayed together for the other, and now that the crisis feels like it's passed?
Nate doesn't tremble, doesn't try to hide. He can't. All that's left is for the mire in his chest to force itself out some other way, the shimmering in his eyes finally pushing past the dam he'd had up. It doesn't even feel cathartic, just adds to the feeling of panic, of terror. He shouldn't be alive, neither of them should, not really, but they are, and he has no idea what to do, beyond pressing his face harder against the other man, not bothering to hide the cool fluid dripping down his cheeks. Instead, he tries to force more words out, like an idiot, unable to hold his tongue. "You're fucking... you're important to me. I want... I don't know, Jata, I don't, but... whatever I do want, I want it with you."
The shaking breaks his heart though, along with the face pressing into his neck. Trying to hide. It brings back different memories, no better than before really, and it makes Nate shift, try to pull more of the other man against him, onto his lap. "Okay." He repeats softly, lips pressed against whatever part of Sunjata's face isn't hidden away. There's a tremble in his voice now, and he doesn't have the strength to hold it back anymore, doesn't have it in him to hold himself up as well. His mind's been trying to collapse this whole time, has only stayed together for the other, and now that the crisis feels like it's passed?
Nate doesn't tremble, doesn't try to hide. He can't. All that's left is for the mire in his chest to force itself out some other way, the shimmering in his eyes finally pushing past the dam he'd had up. It doesn't even feel cathartic, just adds to the feeling of panic, of terror. He shouldn't be alive, neither of them should, not really, but they are, and he has no idea what to do, beyond pressing his face harder against the other man, not bothering to hide the cool fluid dripping down his cheeks. Instead, he tries to force more words out, like an idiot, unable to hold his tongue. "You're fucking... you're important to me. I want... I don't know, Jata, I don't, but... whatever I do want, I want it with you."
grab your saints and pray
and we'll burn this world today
and we'll burn this world today
