He figured living was just easier

SAMUEL

Stretch out my life

And pick the seams out

"After recent events I'm wondering if they are." Sam said, with far more bitterness than could be expected from him towards his family. Sighing and shaking his head, he looked away, trouble in his brow. "I...I have never doubted my alliance to the Voice as much as I do now, which is bizarre, because nothing that substantial has happened. Yet...something about that meeting. I don't know." He shrugged, though it was clear it was bothering him.

Remi's awkward answer solved several questions that Sam had asked and hadn't asked: he nodded, wondering if there was trouble in the marriage. Once, as horrible as it was to admit, he might have been a little happy. Now he was just tired and didn't want to hear any more bad news, so he didn't ask. "Are you raising her too, then?"

take what you like

but close my ears and eyes

WORDSWORTH

everything i knew is turning into ruins in your shadow

"I'll not pretend to understand, Sam. What...this family of yours is like is not a world I know well enough. But for all the things you've ever said to me...Is it the Voice? Or the Ascended?" Sam keeping the details to himself was well enough, perhaps this too he could ponder on his own.

Swallowing, Remi shook his head gently, but firmly. "No." He replied softly. "Aoife was my only child. For me, there won't be anyone but her." Still, that didn't get quite to the heart of it, so looking up, he levelled the bookmaker an uncertain sort of stare. "She lives with us of course, so I suppose in that sense it would be wrong to say I'm not helping, but...I'm not her father."

THE ALCHEMIST

i thought that i'd be ready
but falling isn't steady once you let go

SAMUEL

Stretch out my life

And pick the seams out

Remi's question quietened Sam for a second as he thought, bringing a hand to his chin and rubbing his fingers over his mouth as if trying to stop himself admitting a thought too soon. "...I suppose a bit of both, really. The Voice does things I struggle to justify. The Ascended seem to not like me very much as a whole. Yet, it is the most belonging I have ever had, and I believe in some ways we have vastly improved the world. Me and you would not be stood on this beach were it not for the Voice, after all." It was a multi-layered issue and one that he couldn't seem himself discussing with anyone but Remi: he'd missed the man's calm and balanced opinions of the New Goddess.

The mention of Aoife, while to be expected, sent a little chill through Sam. It was that name he'd shouted on this very beach not that long ago. A part of him wanted to apologise, but the part that was beginning to learn how to navigate this new Remi thought better of mentioning it at all.

"I see. And I assume Safrin isn't living there?" He let out a soft, not quite laugh and shook his head. "Sorry, that's...a silly thought. ...Did you...ever think you'd end up here? With a husband on a beach, with a Demi-God child and...well, I've heard you're the Governor." Sam raised an eyebrow as if asking Remi to confirm this.

take what you like

but close my ears and eyes

WORDSWORTH

everything i knew is turning into ruins in your shadow

"More and more I'm learning that's the thing about faith in the gods...It isn't for us to justify the things they do. Either you believe them above human notions of right and wrong and realize that we're just toys in this sandbox of theirs, or...you try and fight them on it." His shoulders shrugged, his tone making it clear which side of things Remi believed himself to be on. "Well, I'd be here. I didn't take a portal to get to Torchline like you did." The Alchemist corrected with a small grin.

Raising his brows at that, considering Sam's expression to see if that was meant to be some poorly worded joke, eventually, he shook his head. Like him, the bookmaker wasn't always the best with words. At least Remi could forgive him that, now. "No, she's not." He replied softly.

"This life? No. I imagined Ronin and I would have died a long time ago at the hands of some monster we picked a fight with. But all this?" He looked around as if expecting to see physical manifestations of all that he'd accomplished and endured. "And yes, I am. That I chose myself, so I suppose I expected it in some capacity."

THE ALCHEMIST

i thought that i'd be ready
but falling isn't steady once you let go

SAMUEL

Stretch out my life

And pick the seams out

Remi's idea of the Gods being above morality was interesting, something Sam had considered himself...though perhaps there was something more human that was the real problem here: "It's tiring, when you defend the Voice, to have to be justifying to everybody all the time. No one questions those that follow the Old Gods as heavily as they do Ascended. Sometimes I miss the days where the largest fights I was in were to do with the pricing of my books." Some of those had been rather fierce (retail, ugh) but at least he hadn't felt like his personal beliefs and self were being attacked. "..But what am I to do anyway? I can hardly un-Ascend." Shrugging, he seemed to drop it.

It occurred to him that he actually didn't know how Remi had gotten to Torchline. He hadn't been at Fiat Lux when Aoife had been killed and he had only found the man some time later. "..How...did you get here? If you want to tell me." He couldn't imagine that he and Ronin had walked, given the distance.

His 'joke' about Safrin went down like a lead balloon but he tried to move past it quickly, smiling a little at Remi's words on his life. "Then...that's good. That you have what you want."

take what you like

but close my ears and eyes

WORDSWORTH

everything i knew is turning into ruins in your shadow

There was more the Alchemist might have said—that Sam could just stop defending the Voice and let her fight her own battles, or that he could go back to tending his shop and sever his ties with his kin—but he too let the subject drop with a nod of his head.

'Safrin.' Remi replied in a low voice. "Ronin had gone to the Temple, though I suppose you know that part of it. Safrin appeared and when she took him away, she took Aoife and I as well." He didn't know why of course and when last Remi had seen the goddess, he'd been far too furious for rationality so he'd never actually asked.

"I have something I chose." The Alchemist corrected. It wasn't necessarily the same as having what he wanted. 'Come on. Sounds like things are about to begin." He inclined his head back towards the beach. As...strangely pleasant as it was speaking to Sam, the Alchemist needed Ronin now more than ever. With Isla's blood now dry on his fingers and stiffening his skin, the urgency he felt was only rising deep in his belly.

~FIN

THE ALCHEMIST

i thought that i'd be ready
but falling isn't steady once you let go