HOTARU
She's in a long black coat tonight
Waiting for me in the downpour outside
Waiting for me in the downpour outside
His humor is only met with a bland look. "It's not a skill you should flaunt." She has been fighting since day one to help relieve him of that burden, and yet he masochistically seeks it out day after day. Nate clearly has been helping at least if the way Sunjata calms beneath his touch is any indication.
For all the brief moment of respite and quips had lasted, it seems everything spirals out of her control within mere moments. Sunjata tugs her in close by the shoulders, and his quiet voice seems to echo in her ears. She is a maelstrom of emotions, wanting to shove them both away and spit her venom, because she is fine. She despises being treated as if she's fragile, as if she's just another of those weak willed emotional women that Sunjata attracts magnetically. Hotaru hates that he reduces her to that, even as she sinks into the embrace helplessly, hiding in his shoulder so that she doesn't have to look at Nate. There is a fine tremble to her entire body, but she does not cry. She would sooner bloody her fingers to pluck out her own eyes than allow that right now. It would be a physical hypocrisy of her claims, and she is happy for them. It is not a lie, even if that happiness is at the cost of her own.
Nate includes himself in the embrace, and her breaths go haggard and uncertain, but it's all she will allow herself. It is a cruel kindness, to be wrapped in their arms as a cold and paltry consolation prize. Hotaru knows they're too kind to mean it that way, which is all that keeps her in their arms. But she straightens eventually, glad for her dry face as she composes herself and puts distance between them, as should be appropriate. "Thank you," she forces herself to say. "I'm sorry. I'm not normally such a wreck, and it's certainly not your fault." A steadying breath, and she digs her nails in her thighs for lack of anything better to do to prompt some control. "But the wedding this time better be more enjoyable, is all I have to say." Trying for levity, for distraction.
There's nothing else she has to say. She won't make them feel guilty for finding each other. She is merely the shared ground between them, and Hotaru may be many cruel and unjust things, but she won't insert herself here. Not at their expense.
For all the brief moment of respite and quips had lasted, it seems everything spirals out of her control within mere moments. Sunjata tugs her in close by the shoulders, and his quiet voice seems to echo in her ears. She is a maelstrom of emotions, wanting to shove them both away and spit her venom, because she is fine. She despises being treated as if she's fragile, as if she's just another of those weak willed emotional women that Sunjata attracts magnetically. Hotaru hates that he reduces her to that, even as she sinks into the embrace helplessly, hiding in his shoulder so that she doesn't have to look at Nate. There is a fine tremble to her entire body, but she does not cry. She would sooner bloody her fingers to pluck out her own eyes than allow that right now. It would be a physical hypocrisy of her claims, and she is happy for them. It is not a lie, even if that happiness is at the cost of her own.
Nate includes himself in the embrace, and her breaths go haggard and uncertain, but it's all she will allow herself. It is a cruel kindness, to be wrapped in their arms as a cold and paltry consolation prize. Hotaru knows they're too kind to mean it that way, which is all that keeps her in their arms. But she straightens eventually, glad for her dry face as she composes herself and puts distance between them, as should be appropriate. "Thank you," she forces herself to say. "I'm sorry. I'm not normally such a wreck, and it's certainly not your fault." A steadying breath, and she digs her nails in her thighs for lack of anything better to do to prompt some control. "But the wedding this time better be more enjoyable, is all I have to say." Trying for levity, for distraction.
There's nothing else she has to say. She won't make them feel guilty for finding each other. She is merely the shared ground between them, and Hotaru may be many cruel and unjust things, but she won't insert herself here. Not at their expense.
singing "Baby come home" in a melody of tears
While the rhythm of the rain keeps time
While the rhythm of the rain keeps time
